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andave's place

Heeeeelp! SOS!!

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Help! Is this confusing?? Do I make sense or do I twist you in circles with my different tenses? This is for a scholarship that asks me to make a top ten list of things I want to accomplish in my lifetime. Of course I had to dress it up a little, but my editor (my Mom) says that she got so confused with the tenses. Basically I'm telling a future me, an old me, what I want me to be like now.

Dear Me,

You’ll probably find this in your attic fifty years from now. Please remember me, when I am lost in the depths of time. I do not fear growing but I am afraid that you’ll be something I never wanted you to be. When I am old—when I am you—remember who I wanted you to be.
I want you to be well-read. Books hold the key to humanity; to forget them would be to forget yourself and all that you hold most dear.
I want you to be well-traveled. Truly become a child of a thousand lands and the entire universe is yours!
I want you to own wonderful things. Not money but old books, art, and music. Let there be a record of who you are.
I want you to grow in grace.
I want you to get many Ph.D's in more than one subject!
I want you to be a fantastic professor. You have the power to mold people and their lives—do not abuse it!
I want you to do something principled and heroic. Find out your limits, even if it hurts.
I want you to write a book. Fill it with real characters that leap off the page and into your heart.
I want you to be a wonderful wife and mother.
Finally, all of the things on this list are worthless unless they are used for a specific purpose. Use them to glorify God. I want you to be a Christian more than anything!
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Comments

  1. Virgil's Avatar
    I think you need to phrase it in the past tense. Or is it past conditional tense? Something like this:
    "I want you to have been well read.

    Edit: Though as I reread it again, what you have is ok too. I guess I can't decide either. Let's see what someone else says.
  2. applepie's Avatar
    I was getting ready to post the same. You are writing to yourself in the future, but talking at the age you are now. So... maybe change the wording a bit. Simply changing "I want" to "I wanted" makes a huge difference. Maybe try that and see if you like how it reads. Much Love, Meg By the way, good luck with the scholarship:)
  3. mtpspur's Avatar
    I felt it reflected what you are writing now to your older self and it should be written as the young lady you currently are who is on the cusp of being a fantastic contributor to the lives of others. May God lead you in his paths and He will show you a bright future indeed. So to me the tenses made sense so don't get all Phariseeical in the details dear.
    Updated 10-24-2008 at 09:50 PM by mtpspur
  4. Anza's Avatar
    eh... hard descision. I need to think on it...
  5. kiz_paws's Avatar
    I can't decide either, Andya
    But I want to wish you the best of luck with the scholarship!
  6. andave_ya's Avatar
    Thank you so much for all your help, everyone! I will try fiddling around with it and see what happens.