Diary Of A Shadow

So I was in the library chatting on the internet as I usually do. ( I don't have a computer at home so basically I'm at the library everyday.) when all of the sudden the emergency lights went on for the entire building where two hundred people had to be evacuated from the inside to the outer parking lot area.

( Including myself.)

( Probally some punk kid pulled the fire alarm thinking it was cute.)

As random luck would have it I met one of the librarians working who is a attractive girl around my age in the parking lot where we began to converse as fire trucks encircled the library.


To my surprise when I asked her out for a coffee in her free-time she did not reject me but instead actually accepted my request by giving me her phone number.

( Could it be my new clothes and boots?)

( I did dress up today as a result of buying new clothes.)

Anyways she told me to call her Tuesday 3 p.m. sharp.

To say I'm excited is no over-exaggeration as the thought of being in a relationship with this beauty has me enthralled.

It's been three years since I have ever done anything like this and to say I'm out of practice when it comes to dating would be no over exaggeration at all.

I'm excited where right now I feel giddy wanting to jump up and down but at the same time I am filled with anxiety worrying if I will come off well or not in her eyes.

( Not to mention that currently I'm a financial train wreck looking very un-impressive when it comes to status and social influence.)

( Will she see past all of that? I don't know.)

( My expirience with many women is negative on all of that but still there is somthing peculiar about her that I'm hoping is somehow different.)

I try to be a person who expects nothing who feels no sense of hope in anything where if nothing should come to happen afterwards I feel no pain or loss from such a emotional stance but I would lie if I said that I didn't want this encounter to go just right.

For now I am caught amongst a haze of day dreams until me and this girl meet again.