Halls of the Dark Muse

Oh my God. What does his wife say? If she thinks he's serious, then you two need to contact the police.

His wife begged him not to do it. But he is tired of the state of the world in general and of his own current situation, and says he is just tried to always have to struggle all the time and he just dose not want to do it anymore.

The police? I don't think this should have anything to do with the police, it's not as if he had done something wrong or as if any authority had the right to decide what he has to do with his own life. Please let people die if they want to. I can relate to what he thinks about being tired of struggling. I would not know what to do either in your place. In the end it will be his choice, he seems to have taken the time to think of it. It must be horrible for his wife, to think that he might die soon and that not even her love for him or his for her might make him decide otherwise. That must be something very hurtful, what he's going through.

Muse the man is deeply disturbed. Almost no one commits suicide without a mental problem. And certainly not because the news is bad on TV. This man needs medical attention.

How tragic ... it makes me at a loss as to what to say/suggest. I think, were it my friend, that I would do whatever I could to get them to come to me (either suggest a meeting place, or have them come over to my home). If my friend was truly unstable, I'd talk him into coming with me to the Crisis Centre we have at the nearest hospital. I don't know what else I'd do -- the police don't come anytime quick when there is an actual robbery (another story, believe me), so if the clock is ticking as you are saying, leaning one way or the other -- the Crisis Centre or the local Emergency centre could get your friend the help he requires but fails to see? Something like that, Muse. I am so sorry to read of this anguish for everyone involved.

Hi Virgil. I am not sure about the mental problem. Couldn't it be possible that someone feels a terrible sorrow because life on this planet is too harsh for him? Why would we necessarily have to be willing to go on with our condition here? I'm not sure it's a question of mental problems, I believe that someone can decide in a sane way if staying alive is worth it or not, if he has enough strength to go on. That's a choice like any other choice, I think, depending on many personal elements.

Virgil, I have to agree with Sweets, I have known him for a long time, and in fact we refer to each other as brother and sister and I know he is not making this choice from a place of mental instablity, he is not "deeply distrubed" and it is not as simple as bad news on TV, it is a combination of many things. I do agree with his choice but I resepct his right to make it, becasue I know that he is making this choice with full awareness of what he is doing. I do not feel it is my place to call the police. I do not think he should be forced by drugs, or by some outside authority or restrained against his will.

Your friend's ultimate decision of course rests with him. I do not agree with it in any shape or form. Suicide has haunted me for decades in one form or another, Slashed wrists, pills, hanging, despression the litany could go on. A friend of mine's sister killed herself two weeks ago having seen her father blow his brains out seven years ago. The evil that men do lives on. But I firmly believe it is the one sin you can't take back and I believe strongly in he afterlife. Suicide is an extremely selfish act that hurts those around them. You truly did help me a few weeks ago understand my mother a bit better and I am grateful for that but if I was with your friend I gues the only thing I would have to say (if I was in a good mood that is) would be "What's your hurry?" In a very bad mood--"Need help laying a rug down so there's less of a mess to clean up?" Either question might lead one to pause and reconsider. Suicide starts at the very least from a depression of the status quo and an unwillingness to see the light. May God have mercy. Sigh--

Well both myself and my friend are reincarnationists so I suppose in a way death is not so permiment in our view, he has grown tired of his current state in life, so if he does go through with it, then may he have better luck in his next life and perhaps we will meet again in some form.

maybe you should both sit him down, talk to him and see if there is anything you both can do for him? it may be a cry for help. I've been down that road before with a friend of my from college. Its tough.

Depression is an illness, and thinking of it in any other terms but mental illness is medival.
http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Sec...3039&lstid=326
http://www.medicinenet.com/mental_illness/article.htm
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publi...lication.shtml

He has the right to make what choices for himself he wishes to make. And I am not going to do anything to have him comittied, or locked up, or drugged up.

Perhaps he could get some help with the things that he is struggling with. If that is the problem then that could be fixed. Sometimes life is difficult, but what if we all just killed ourselves whenever we were tired of going through difficulties? With effort we can change our lives into something better. Personally, my own life no longer belongs to me, it belongs to my husband and children. I do not have the right to choose to leave them. I feel sorry for people who are living only for themselves or their own satisfaction with life. That would certainly be depressing enough to make one consider suicide. I hope your friend gives himself time to turn things around.

I wonder why people need to judge those who contemplate suicide. To make them feel guilty. To accuse them of being sinners or selfish. Yes we all have felt bad in our lives but this has nothing to do with someone who feels so bad that he prefers dying. We can always try and help him, but it will always be his decision in the end. People always bring the selfish word about everything, as if being in total despair was selfish. Sometimes a family or a husband are not enough, sometimes the feeling of being lost is just unbearable, and this is something so personal that it is very hard for other people to understand it, even if they are relatives. Why wouldn't it be selfish to force someone to live just because we love them? To forbid someone from dying just to keep them with us? If we love them, then, why not leaving the choice to them? Yes, it surely is better to leave them suffering. See, selfishness is everywhere, not always where you point your finger.

I think people deal with problems differently. What one person would do, is not what another would think about. Many people thought of suicide at some point of their lives. I don't know about selfish, but I think facing problems is much better. I hear what you're saying, Sweets, but it's hard when a loved one is thinking about killing themselves. You can't help it but feel sad and a need to try to talk them out of it. You don't have to tell them they're wrong and selfish, but I don't think you'll just let them go without a talk at least.
I hope your friend finds his way and decides on what's best for him eventually, Muse.

I have tried to talk over with him why he was feeling this way, and to try and find other solutions, I do not wish him to kill himself, though I resepct that it is his choice to make, and in someways I understand, even if I would not choose the same, nor have I beein the same posistion he is in. All of his life has been an upward struggle, and he has always tried to better himself and his situtuation in the best ways in which he was able and knew how, but he has never hit even ground. I can imagine it is difficult to have to fight for everything every day. Everyone has troubles and problems, but I know the depths of what he has been through.