applepie

I wasn't going to blog at all tonight, honest:) The plan was to go to bed early since I've had far too many late nights lately. Striving for that goal, I was sitting here enjoying a nice glass of red wine, a Chianti (my current favorite), trying to relax before calling it an evening. An empty house is really not the place to be when you are trying to mellow out. With nothing to distract me, I've spent the night thinking about life in general. Many people come and go in my life, but the nice red wine made me think of one in particular.

Her name was Krissy and I met her when I first moved to Washington. She was my neighbor by way of living across the street. We hit it off and became friends of a sort. It began with just the passing hello and goodbye. Before long, I was babysitting her children for a little extra money. Her son was close in age to Garrick, so it also bave him someone to play with. Our husbands were both on sea-duty at the time, so they were gone as much as they were home. After a while we started to do dinner at one another's houses. Especially when our husbands were gone, we would often take turns cooking so that we had a bit more help than there would be otherwise. Krissy was the one who introduced me to red wine for the first time. It was a Cabernet, I believe, but almost any red has her surfacing in my thoughts.

I've had many people come and go in my life, and many of them have been close friends. I'm not too sure what happens but we just eventually grow apart. It is almost as if I meet them, learn to love and care for them as a friend, and then when we've taught the other all there is for us to teach the whole thing dissolves. The friendships are very real, but they are almost more part of our learning than anything else. From Krissy I learned to be independant from my family and to stand on my own as a woman, mother, and wife. From me, she took away the resiliance to deal with constant changes in life. She was never one to favor change, and I think I helped her learn to cope with that, just as she helped me learn to utilize my own independant spirit.

As a child the shifting friendships was something of a pain in my heart. I was never able to accept that sometimes friendship is forever, but the relationship part of it will dissipate. We lose touch, and all they are is a fond memory in my head. Something called upon by such things as the taste of red wine, the barely noticable scent of patcholi in the air, or the smell of fish sticks cooking in the oven. I know that is an odd one, but one of the most vivid memories I have of a childhood friend was staying the night at her house. We had fish sticks for dinner, and the smell still brings her to my mind.

Krissy and I have grown apart in the past two years, but she is still fond in my heart. I hold dear the happy memories of our time together, and I carry with me all that I have learned. When something triggers the memories I grieve for what is lost, but I rejoice in what was found for however brief a time. This is to the friends whom have come and gone, those who are filling my present with love and joy, and for those who will come in my future to help me to continue to grow and become the person I am destined to be. Listen to the song and enjoy, the contrast of melancholy and optimism reminds me of my own heart. As such, it is a personal favorite... Peter Gabriel's - I Grieve[URL="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQ3wpjdYMqk"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQ3wpjdYMqk[/URL]

Until the next time, much love and thanks for being some of the friends who are breathing life, joy, and knowledge into my life now.

Much Love,
Meg