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Completely rewritten and hopefully the better for it. But for the life of me I can't remember the Logos jokes.

I was scheduled for 2 pm-10 pm Saturday coming off a week vacation. Friday night second shift dispatcher Tonya slipped in the ladies room and fractured her left radial bone and is in a sling. Doctor says don't even think about working Saturday night.

When an employee calls in on the weekend they are required to contact the on call weekend manager which rotates in seniority order: Debbie, Doug, Dave, Josh, Sean, Jeannie.

Jeannie is second shift call center supervisor. Josh is dispatch supervisor. It's in my best interest to behave for her and give her proper guidance if I perceive an error of service being committed which doesn't happen as often as it used to after all these years we have a fair rapport. Except when a member is breathing fire thru the telephone and I seem to dragged into it even when it wasn't my call. Neither here nor there.

Now Doug was on call. Tonya should have contacted HIM. In the Brady Bunch universe that would have been the end of it and my life would have been a little easier that evening as I am blissfully unaware I will be called to step up when needed.

Instead at 7:30 am Saturday Tonya calls JOSH (our real boss). That might have worked except for one little detail.

She left a voice mail for him. Since Josh wasn't on call this weekend he was out having a life. Astute readers will already figure out what's coming down the pike.

To her credit Tonya also calls first shift dispatcher Sam. (Think of Sam as Logos in my AAA worldview only without lawyers and restraining orders.) Now Sam is sharp but she misread the situation. Upon hearing Tonya mention contacting Josh Sam made no move to contact Doug thinking Josh was already looking around for the fulcrum to move Heaven and Earth to get me a partner for the evening. After all we belong to him. The system works.

Not this time.

Hours go by. I leave the house around quarter after 1pm so to arrive at work and eat lunch in an air-conditioned environment and remind Sam how much she looks like Ruth and I am a shallow bad Christian at heart who worships the Peter Pan mindset--doesn't want to grow up.

While en route a panic stricken Josh finally checks his cell phone and realizes the hope of getting a volunteer dispatcher on a Saturday night (even in Dayton Ohio people love their weekends) and he has until 4 pm to do it.

A good manager would take the hit and come in.

Josh says he's covered in oil and grease from working on a truck. Sam explains to him the concept of a cold shower. Shy she is not. Josh has a thick skin and it's a foregone conclusion he won't be annoyng me this evening.
The problem with managers helping in dispatch is that they are out of practice and touch with the day to day fun and games of cheerleading, blackmailing or begging tow companies to honor their contracts with us. I woud have spent most of my evening watching the manager to make sure they don't mess up the calls.

Josh calls Doug to pass the buck to the proper manager. Doug makes some token calls with no luck. Caller ID has spared many a worker the trial of saying no to your place of employment and not be exposed as a disloyal employee when the chips are down.

2 pm comes and Sam leaves and I take her place. Being apprised of the state of confusion I already know I'll be stuck for midnight or ten hours--with no supper until I get home. The inheritance check is still two weeks away if all goes well.

I look at dear sweet Brandy who just the other day helped make my birthday special. I also know she needs money as bad as I do. Plus my friend and sister in Christ. She'll walk the extra mile with her favorite Roman.

Way too much 7th Heaven and Little House on the Prairie reruns. Brandy is going with 1st shift dispatcher Jed to see Indiana Jones and then a real date with her latest man in her life (that seems to be going well for a change). Part time Bob S. has grand-son plans. Partner Bob B. doing the caller ID thing. Highly unlikely he would have come. He hates it here. Somewhat of a comedown from Fairborn Police dispatcher especially when people don't jump when you tell them to. John and Tami from 1st shift also no shows. Tami claims family reunion which no one believes. John probably wasn't asked and he is famous for not helping anyone.

I'm thinking at least Doug isn't too bad at dispatch. Sean and Jeannie don't dispatch at all since the call center is their balliwick and Dave is good for calling members and that's about it. But he would put up a good attempt to give him his due.

Finally at 3:15 pm Sam calls in. Doug called her - twice and since she has no life she kept me company until 10 pm. She's taking Wednesday off in return to get five days in a row off. Plus we make a good team.

Ironically Saturday was so lacking in calls I can honestly say from 7 pm on I could have handled it. We never had more then eight going at a time.

Josh tried getting Sam to leave at 9 pm (for which he will pay and I warned him--take my little AAA Logos away from me will he!!) because we were down to six calls at that time. He said five to which I informed him he's blind as a bat--almost told him how to count. He was monitoring on his home laptop. He would have paid her for 10 pm anyway--because she was due to come back 6 am Sunday. Gee never bothers them to deprive ME of sleep in similar situations over the years. She refused. Wisely Sam doesn't want management doing her 'favors' as they come back on you. Josh felt I owed him a favor on the midnight run. Sort of yes sort of no. To my advantage to play the game which is all this is.

Manager Debbie showed up at 4 pm to ensure all was well and that's why she rocks as a manager. She goes the extra mile. Why Doug dragged her into this is anyone's guess. Probably needed her Ok to do the shift if he HAD to.

All went well that night but Sunday was a horror. All the people who didn't call Saturday made up for it and the usual Sunday numbers as well. I was non-stop operating until around 10:30 pm as I had to clsoe midnight as normally scheduled.

As we used to chant in the Air Force -- "We love it here, we love it here, we love it here.