20 today
by , 03-29-2008 at 08:47 AM (1139 Views)
Hey, it's my birthday today. I'm 20. 20! How can I be 20 already?!
You know what the irony of this is?
Yesterday we had my aunt's funeral, the one with the cancer. Dad drove us up to Gloucestershire from London and my other aunt came down all the way from Essex. My cousin wanted to come but he’d just landed at Gatwick as we were leaving, he was devastated that he couldn’t come. If there’d been a way for him to go he would’ve done it but he couldn’t. No one told him about it because they didn’t want to spoil his holiday (He’d gone before we found out) We thought he’d arrive back on Thursday but he didn’t, otherwise he could’ve come.
My views shift now and then from atheist to agnostic, sometimes I believe in something after death but mostly I know that when you die that’s it. Well, I say I know, I don’t actually know but I’m pretty sure. Once you’re gone you’re gone but you can still live on if there are people who remember you. You can be with them if they believe in you, even if you’re not really there. That’s what I think now anyway. But who knows? I could be completely wrong. Guess I’ll find out some day.
There’s two things that are certain in life (that I can see at the moment)
1) History will always grow, history is fixed in the past, while the future is what you make of it.
2) If you live, you die. You WILL die. You have to accept it. Accept it and you have nothing to fear.
That’s it for now. There’s other stuff I have to say but I’ll end for now.
(Oh, by the way, our wandering cat, Tabs, has returned today, he’s thinner and last time we saw him his paw was really swollen, we haven’t seen him in ages. I’m glad we saw him, I thought he was dead.)
Oh well, Bluebiird out.



