Rubaiyats of Lote-Tree

Some words of wisdom (?) (allegedly) ;-)

1. Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
-Keppel Enderbery

2. "The loss of life will be irreplaceable."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

3. "I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have is that I didn't study my Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

3. "What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

4. "It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago. . ."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

5. "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
-Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina

5. "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

6. "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

7. "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."
-Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

8. "It's no exaggeration to say that the undecided could go one way or another"
- George Bush, US President

9. I have opinions of my own, strong opinions but I don't always agree with them."
-George Bush, US President

10. "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
-Lee Iacocca

11. "The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
-Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback and sports analyst

12. "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor

13. "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
- Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

12. "We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
- Former US Vice President Dan Quayle

13. Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever,
because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever,
but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest

14. Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- Mariah Carey

15. "I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
-David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.

16. "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal
antismoking campaign

17. "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body."
-Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward

18. "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC

19. "We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
-Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks

20. "I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them.
There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians
were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves."
- John Wayne

Humour is the Sun that drives the Winter from the human face