de Renal

The end of the day always makes me sad somehow. At twilight, when everything is quiet, peaceful, soft, I feel trapped by my thoughts who grow bigger and bigger, buzzing like the bees building the hive inside my head, and finally deteriorate into nothingness. Sometimes the setting sun, which slides down my bedroom window, makes me easy; its warmth cuddles my face and I think there is nothing in this world to make me more tranquil than this soft, warm blanket from the sky. The past haunts me, and I keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again. I never learn; and I'm not sure one ever does. The dreams I have vividly speak of my regrets, even though, when I'm awake, I know things couldn't have been different. Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I wake up with tears rolling down my cheeks. People I loved aren't here for me anymore, and there is no way to tell them I'm sorry. And even if I did, nothing more can be done. I just wish I had more courage to except the fact that every person, including me, is all alone.