View RSS Feed

Progymnasmata

Why I Refuse to Let a Banana Win: A Meditation

Rate this Entry
11 Comments
by
The Comedian
, 04-28-2010 at 01:52 PM (1768 Views)
Sometimes I can be a little competitive. And other times I can be a lot competitive. The competitive drive peaks when I pit myself versus myself. If I set a goal for myself, I need to finish it. Especially if this goal is frivolous, inconsequential, or otherwise meaningless. (Yes, I know that last sentence is a fragment).

So I have this silly pet peeve: picky eaters. Unless you're 5 or are deadly allergic to mushrooms, you should not pick them off your pizza. Just eat the damn thing and politely refuse a second piece.

This picky eating habit annoys me when others exhibit it (in which case I just shut up, then go roll my eyes when they're not lookin'). But it drives me absolutely crazy if I exhibit anything like it.

So I try all food, regardless of how it smells, what it looks like, or the various gag-reflexes that it inspires. But I have to go beyond "trying" it. I have to get to a "don't hate it" level of appreciation. I don't have to like or love the food; I just can't "hate" it.

How have I overcome the odious look of sardines and mustard sauce? The vile texture of buttermilk? Practice. These foods become my little project (which inspires endless -eyerolls- from the Mrs).

But one food almost beat me: bananas. They taste fine, but they made me sick to my stomach. I think I may have been allergic to them because whenever I ate one, a moderate to bad stomach ache would follow. It frustrated the hell out of me because I hated bananas. And I didn't want to hate bananas. I couldn't hate bananas!

So I resolved that I would never be beaten by a banana. I ate a banana for breakfast everyday. I was going to simply will away the stomach ache through force of habit and strength of desire.

Man, I went to work hunched over and grumpy for weeks.

My wife kept asking, "When are you going give this up?"

"I will not let a banana win!" I said.

"" she returned.

But, in time, and after misery, the stomach aches went away. I went a full week eating bananas without a stomach issue, and declared myself the winner.

Do I still eat bananas? Occasionally.

Updated 04-28-2010 at 01:55 PM by The Comedian

Categories
Uncategorized

Comments

  1. applepie's Avatar
    Stubborn much :lol: I know what you mean though. I can't stand being picky over food. I don't like it out of myself or my kids. An allergy is a bit different, but then I still let Victoria have bits of dairy knowing she'll have issues. I keep hoping that exposure will make it go away :)
  2. JuniperWoolf's Avatar
    Wow, that's the first time that I've ever seen you use an emoticon.

    Love the blog, by the way. What resolve! That is pretty competitive. Hmm... you weren't one of those university students that almost had a conniption fit if someone got a better grade than you, were you?
    Updated 04-28-2010 at 03:36 PM by JuniperWoolf
  3. Paulclem's Avatar


    Great blog.

    One of the best mixed blessings for me was that my Mother was a terrible cook.

    I used to love school dinners - which always had some universally disliked aspect like tapioca pudding or baked beans made by the school which were crunchy, or spam fritters or deep fried sausages in batter, (we used to get more exercise then), or the lumpy custard.

    I just couldn't understand why my compatriots would moan and complain about them.

    I am now very easy to please and never complain about food. I look at those food critics with their astronomically gastronomic standards and think - they're hardly ever going to be happy with what's in front of them, whereas I nearly always am. Who's better off?
    Updated 04-28-2010 at 05:36 PM by Paulclem
  4. 1n50mn14's Avatar
    I've never heard of banana allergies before, but I understand the self-competition thoroughly.
  5. Niamh's Avatar
    Brilliant!
    you just reminded me i have a banana in my work bag!
  6. Virgil's Avatar
    Excellent blog! Lucky for me I love bananas. I've never heard of someone not liking bananas.
  7. The Comedian's Avatar
    @Juniperwoolf -- Naw, I wasn't too pissed if someone else did better than me. A little pissed, sure. But no conniption fit. As Becca said, I'm just super competitive with myself, especially about meaningless stuff.

    Paul -- absolutely. And to answer your question, "you are better off, amigo. You are most certainly better off".
  8. qimissung's Avatar
    Alrighty then!

    Is that why you don't like those dancing bananas? And Comedian, here I thought you were the sanest and most stable of us all!
    Updated 04-28-2010 at 10:59 PM by qimissung
  9. prendrelemick's Avatar
    I hate picky eaters too- unless its onions!
  10. Scheherazade's Avatar
    How interesting.

    I really don't see the point of forcing anyone (or yourself) to eat something that they do not enjoy.

    Unless it is KitKats, of course.
  11. The Comedian's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Scheherazade
    I really don't see the point of forcing anyone (or yourself) to eat something that they do not enjoy.
    Oh Scher, it's old habit for me. "Write that paper; it's good for you!"

    or

    "I know you don't like presentations, but well, you need to learn how to do them" . . . .

    Or at home:

    "Sure vitamins are yucky, but they're good for you. Just eat them!"