Biggus
11-10-2017, 05:15 AM
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 387
Mary, Mary, quite contrary
Decided to sow Stock seed
But later she realised her error
After sowing Japanese knotweed
ARE YOU WEARING PEDAL PUSHERS?
Are you wearing pedal pushers?
I think it’s their appearance you like
Given that you are a sedentary being
And you can’t even ride a bike
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN # 6
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern
Contrary to the rumour of their demise
Are working as the Chuckle Brothers
In their most cunning disguise
A VOYAGE ROUND MY FATHER (7)
He said “I was asked by my daughter,
If I could go out to East Africa”
I retorted “that’s amazing, Kenya?”
He replied “No I had to disappoint her”
MY FRIENDS CALL ME SNAKE HIPS
My friends call me snake hips
Though not because I’m thin
I earned my unfortunate nickname
Because I have really dry skin
WHEN MY BROTHER WAS AT COLLEGE
When my brother was at college
He had an unusual nickname
Which was the “snow plough”
Because of his appetite for cocaine
LOVE IS ABOUT THE COMPROMISE
Love is about the compromise
It’s the corner stone I would say
For example if we should disagree
We compromise and do it her way
WHEN ASKED WHAT HE DID FOR A LIVING # 3
When asked what he did for a living
He replied furtively “I’m a spy”
Then he added he was from Belarus
And clarified “I’m a Minsk Spy”
IT WAS A SPECIAL TIME WHEN WE WED
It was a special time when we wed
In front of family, friend and piers
We found it a very emotional day
Even the Wedding cake was in tiers
DRINK GREEN BEER
Drink green beer
On St Patricks Day
It will count as one
Of your five a day
Mary, Mary, quite contrary
Decided to sow Stock seed
But later she realised her error
After sowing Japanese knotweed
ARE YOU WEARING PEDAL PUSHERS?
Are you wearing pedal pushers?
I think it’s their appearance you like
Given that you are a sedentary being
And you can’t even ride a bike
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN # 6
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern
Contrary to the rumour of their demise
Are working as the Chuckle Brothers
In their most cunning disguise
A VOYAGE ROUND MY FATHER (7)
He said “I was asked by my daughter,
If I could go out to East Africa”
I retorted “that’s amazing, Kenya?”
He replied “No I had to disappoint her”
MY FRIENDS CALL ME SNAKE HIPS
My friends call me snake hips
Though not because I’m thin
I earned my unfortunate nickname
Because I have really dry skin
WHEN MY BROTHER WAS AT COLLEGE
When my brother was at college
He had an unusual nickname
Which was the “snow plough”
Because of his appetite for cocaine
LOVE IS ABOUT THE COMPROMISE
Love is about the compromise
It’s the corner stone I would say
For example if we should disagree
We compromise and do it her way
WHEN ASKED WHAT HE DID FOR A LIVING # 3
When asked what he did for a living
He replied furtively “I’m a spy”
Then he added he was from Belarus
And clarified “I’m a Minsk Spy”
IT WAS A SPECIAL TIME WHEN WE WED
It was a special time when we wed
In front of family, friend and piers
We found it a very emotional day
Even the Wedding cake was in tiers
DRINK GREEN BEER
Drink green beer
On St Patricks Day
It will count as one
Of your five a day