Biggus
02-13-2017, 05:58 AM
FAIRY TALE’S RESPUN # 11
Hansel and Gretel’s little trips
Were always exceedingly fruitful
Because once deep in the woods
They became Handsy and Grateful
AU PAIR
The meaning of the term
Au pair, is a “Social equal”
So you will find your husband
Ran off with the social equal
ARE YOU WEARING BLOODY CLOTHES?
Are you wearing bloody clothes?
I don’t mind admitting that you look scary
I hope it’s a Halloween costume and you
Haven’t escaped from the penitentiary
I WENT INTO HOSPITAL FOR MINOR SURGERY # 10
I went into hospital for minor surgery
The whole surgical team acted like comedians
As I was going under I heard the surgeon say
“Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!”
WHAT’S A BIDET?
While looking at a hotel website
His granddaughter asked “What’s a Bidet?”
The old soldier smiled wryly and retorted
“It’s a couple of days before D-Day”
WHEN THE ALLSPICE SINGERS
When the allspice singers
Really went off the rails
Coryanda and star Anise
Had the Pepperatzi on their tails
BOOTS THE CHEMIST SUNDAY OPENING
11am to 9pm the sign read
But the opening time was well past
And we were left out in the cold
And their apathy left me aghast
The signage needs to be amended
And a new sign should be tasked
Open “When we can be bothered”
Until “We can no longer be asked”
PEPERAMI IS A BIT OF AN ANIMAL
Peperami is a bit of an animal
Is the pitch the adverts hit
But its animal origins aside
I would like to know “what bit”
Hansel and Gretel’s little trips
Were always exceedingly fruitful
Because once deep in the woods
They became Handsy and Grateful
AU PAIR
The meaning of the term
Au pair, is a “Social equal”
So you will find your husband
Ran off with the social equal
ARE YOU WEARING BLOODY CLOTHES?
Are you wearing bloody clothes?
I don’t mind admitting that you look scary
I hope it’s a Halloween costume and you
Haven’t escaped from the penitentiary
I WENT INTO HOSPITAL FOR MINOR SURGERY # 10
I went into hospital for minor surgery
The whole surgical team acted like comedians
As I was going under I heard the surgeon say
“Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!”
WHAT’S A BIDET?
While looking at a hotel website
His granddaughter asked “What’s a Bidet?”
The old soldier smiled wryly and retorted
“It’s a couple of days before D-Day”
WHEN THE ALLSPICE SINGERS
When the allspice singers
Really went off the rails
Coryanda and star Anise
Had the Pepperatzi on their tails
BOOTS THE CHEMIST SUNDAY OPENING
11am to 9pm the sign read
But the opening time was well past
And we were left out in the cold
And their apathy left me aghast
The signage needs to be amended
And a new sign should be tasked
Open “When we can be bothered”
Until “We can no longer be asked”
PEPERAMI IS A BIT OF AN ANIMAL
Peperami is a bit of an animal
Is the pitch the adverts hit
But its animal origins aside
I would like to know “what bit”