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View Full Version : Chapter 5 (Pt1) :3



Sayleeee
10-27-2016, 02:58 PM
I am a **** writer, but here is a part of my Chapter, starring me =D

“I still don't understand why we can't just locate a Pendant bearer and give them the seven Pendants of [-],” Saylee exclaimed as she flew above the towering tips of the husky mountains. She was presently tracking a large mass of energy, particularly that of several dozen [-], but she was sure that it encompassed the energy of several others as well. “Traveling these great distances may become tiring after some time.” She added as she surveyed the harsh terrain below.

To her, everything looked the same: trees lingered below the towering slopes and stretched across the expansive landscape, with an occasional pond situated in the middle of the

'Had this been the planet from whence you came, your concerns would be understandable, but it isn't, it's much smaller,' The Provenance replied almost instinctively, and yet, she was clearly agitated by Saylee' subtle worryings. 'There is a small patch of empty terrain below, land there.' She added orderly, with little to no concern about their previous discussion.

Saylee' violent aura regressed into nothingness before she came to a stop mid-air. She began to lower herself towards the ground below. Once she found her footing, she surveyed the area and asked the Provenance why she had chosen this area in particular. 'The encampment of the militants is a few kilometers away from your present location.' She explicated.

Following a shrug of her shoulders, Saylee began to walk north.

'Not that way, they are located in the other direction...' The Provenance explained with an insightful tone.

Saylee sighed in response, before she turned around and walked towards the other direction. “You are aware that I haven't had enough time to completely recover from my years of slumber. It seems that my abilities are still lacking and are presently in the state of recovery.” She explained, trying to justify her conduct.

She stepped through a great number of shrubs and herbs and in between the swaying limbs of the lofty trees, simultaneously noticing that the wind had underwent natural development and increased in strength from their present altitude.

'That is completely understandable. However, I feel compelled to warn you to be careful. The group that you are about to engage are known as 'The Humanitarian State Of Independence'; they are a terrorist organization seeking to sabotage the relationship between the the humans and the [-].' The Provenance explained, revealing more relevant facts that Saylee wasn't aware of.

“For political ambitions?” She asked, seemingly intrigued. However, the underlying politics regarding her people's position in the world troubled her little.

'Their underlying motivations are not presently known, but they have been denoting hostile actions motivated by intense dislike towards the [-]; the only logical determination regarding this seems to be politically driven, to whatever means is anybody's guess.'

“The political conflicts between the [-] and the human beings are not my concern; you informed me that my objective to ensure the survival of my people, correct?” Saylee questioned.

t0sh
10-27-2016, 03:22 PM
This writing sucks, too many errors.

Dreamwoven
10-28-2016, 05:12 AM
This may be true, but its a matter of being encouraging, not just a put-down. It would help if Sayleeee could provide a bit of info on his or her background. I've done this in my info about myself, like the country you come from and other things you think may be pertinent.

Sayleeee
11-03-2016, 10:44 AM
Thanks for all of the well thought out responses!!!!!!