jodiva
11-27-2015, 03:42 AM
As I heard you rummage around the attic, my soul-hidden in the seams and fold and stitches- was experiencing a strange feeling no jacket should have felt. I was giddy and scared. I wanted to cry out to you but hide from you in the same time. I imagined my cheek (if i had one) would blush and I'd skitter (if I could move) around nervously as you unveiled one box after another in this dusty purgatory.
Your hand have grown since i last felt it, I can tell. Your footsteps are heavier, too. I wonder how your face would look like after all these years. Secretly, I long to know how you smell have grown. That's all I dared to hope. One last feel of your hand, one last look at your face, one last embrace so I could remember your scent. Then I could lay here, forgotten, until the mites and moths could eat away my remaining dignity.
Now you are getting closer. Do you feel me calling for you? I hope you would. I've been so excited now, I can't think of what would happen if you decided not to open my box. But you put me in a nice, old wooden box- didn't you? I know you did. You just got to open a box as wonderful as mine, right? But what if you only came here to look for another thing? Another piece of clothing, perhaps? Suddenly I felt silly for hoping. Maybe you won't find me after all...
For a moment, all is silent except your breathing. I really hope your phone wouldn't ring. If it does, then you'd pick it up and leave me. But it would, wouldn't it? I mean, you're always so busy and so popular and so successful... I just know it'd ring any second now.
Then you shatter and throw away my worry by opening my box. Your hands are so violent, as always. It's as if you were angry at something. I've never been more grateful for that little flaw of yours.
Good God, you've grown so handsome! Oh! Look at you! You actually grew a beard? It suits you! Oh... I wish you could hear what I say now. Heyheyheyhey! Do you remember me? It's me!! It's not like I'm those kind of T-shirts that you threw away after a particularly filthy day, it's me! I missed you so much buddy... You've grown so much!
Oh.
Damn. You've grown. Look, buddy it's not like I ever hoped you'd pick me up and start wearing me again. It's been years. I totally never thought about that. Honestly. Well... maybe a little bit, a tiny ray of hope but I'm totally fine with that not happening. I just want to see you again before you left me forever. One more time is fine... and this is my one more time, right? I should be thankful for this. ****, i'm totally not crying buddy. Don't have eyes, remember?
Hey, you're smiling! Is it because of me? God, it's been so long since i saw you smile. And your hand... where's it going? OOOOOOH! YES!! YEEEEEEAAAH! YOU PICK ME UP! PLEASEDONTPUTMEDOWNPLEASEDONTPUTMEDOWN not too soon let me just feel your grip on my fabric again pleaseee... aaaah... boy, i've missed you. Now get your face closer... closer...
*COUGH COUGH COUGH*
Ooops. Sorry... Dust. Your wooden box is nice and dry, but dust still comes down through the keyhole... Are you okay? Oh thank goodness. Wait, what's with that face? Oh no... don't put me back please, it's just dust! I bet you can just throw me to the laundry and I'd be in my best in no time! Just yell at your mom to wash me! Or your maid- the one with calloused fingers!
"Hey, what's that you found, babe?"
Whoa whoa whoa. Waaait a minute. Who the hell is that? Never saw her before. Is that... is that your girlfriend? You actually went and get yourself a girlfriend? Well done, buddy! You ladykiller you! She look so charming! I wonder if you give your new jackets to her on cold days to warm her up when she 'forgot' her jacket back home. I bet you do, not that I'd know. I wonder how she fits in them?
"It's my old jacket. A birthday present from mom back in high school."
And you remember! You remember me! I love you! I remember it, too! Your mom was super kind... You know, she wasn't like any other ladies in my shop. Where I'm from, everyone's dressed to the nines. My fellow jackets were, too. They were expensive and they were bought by those men with fancy bow tie and slick shoes... But not your mom, no! I saw her walking, slightly embarrassed. I can relate- that's how I feel around everyone else. I mean, I'm the cheapest jacket in the store! Nobody wants to pick me, nobody! Nobody but her, that is! When she touch me and she looked at the price tag, I was super worried she'd just hung me back and choose something else. But she chose me! I remember her folding me real careful and putting me in a nice box with those cool red ribbons.
I remember her passing a kiss for you through me! Did you know that? Did she tell you? It was right on the inside of the collar. She whispered that it was for luck. Every time you put me on, I sent you her kiss. She was a great mom. I wonder how is she?
"I couldn't bring myself to wear it after mom passed away. It's been over five years."
Oh no... Oh no... She died? ****. I'm so sorry, kid. I didn't know... so that's why you cried so hard when you put me in here? Poor man. She loves you so much, and I know you love her so much. I wonder why it hurts for me, too? I don't have a heart, or a voice. I can't move, but i want to hold you so tight, kid... I'm so sad for you, too. I wish you know that.
"It's a very handsome jacket. She must've worked hard for this."
"This is her one month's salary. I never found out how she could afford it."
With love and hard work, I suppose. That's what it means to be a mom.
"Wanna try it on, babe?"
"Yeah."
*fainted* Oh. My. God. You're gonna... You're gonna... You're gonna try me... On? Okay. O-Kay. Wait a minute, this is my big chance of getting back to the wardrobe, right? I need to look perfect on you! Oh, do you have to try it now? Won't you, like, wash me first or something? Some ironing can't hurt! Oh damn, what if... what if I don't look good on you anymore? Or would it be better that way? I don't want to make you sad every time you see me, either... maybe it would be better to stay in this box. Would it make you happy? Happier? Happy-ish?
Whoops. Okay, you got me up. I'm sorry for being so dusty and old and musty... Please just give me a chance. Please don't change your mind. I can't get back to the box. I just can't. Not after this, not after seeing you...
"It was always a bit too big for me, actually. I wonder how it fits now?"
"I think it's gonna be a bit tight-- hey, what's with that hole?"
"Oh, I did that. I was hanging around with some buddies back then. We were climbing a mountain up north..."
Right! The mountain trail! You almost didn't bring me along. But I was fresh from the laundry and you need an extra warm jacket because the weather said it'd get reaaally cold. And it was! You were lucky you found me in time, you'd freeze without me! See, I saved your life! Didn't save you from getting cut though. I remember that jackass who obviously thought taking a selfie on a narrow path on the edge of a cliff is a great idea. I remember the fall, we rolled down that cliff and you cut your sides on a sharp stone. When your muscles tore i felt no pain, but when the moisture from your blood soaks in my threads... I was so scared. There must be half a litre of blood coming out before your guide reach you.
Do you remember what you said when he finished patching you up? It was the first time I really fell for you, you know. You said, "Do you think it'd leave a mark?" Your guide said, "Well, yeah. It's a pretty deep cut." But then you said to him, "Oh damn. It's my favorite jacket."
I know, I know. Your head must've been hit pretty hard. I love you anyway. Especially after we reach civilization. I remember you asking the local store for some thread and needles. And you can't even sew! Maybe you're just desperate to get me fixed. I'm positive your mom would kill you if she ever saw the wound.
I got another ripped seam when you were smaller and you fight your first fight. You were sixteen and you thought you could fight without removing your jacket. We won that day, but i grumbled the whole way home. If only you could hear me. I made sure to make your skin as itchy as I could for a week after that. You were acting like a monkey for a week! I laughed so hard... *sigh*
We've been through a lot, didn't we? You took me to amazing places. The warm sands, the cool rains, gentle waves and strong wind. And the sun! The sun all the way through, the moonlight, too. They feel nice, you know. The moon radiation up there, in an airplane just for you (and me). You've lived in an adventurous journey! And I get to accompany you through all that!
I have no regret, I thought when you push your well muscled arms inside the arm-sleeve. I truly don't. I've had my share of adventure and now I can feel you here: in my soft, silky embrace that has no heat except from you. I can feel you everywhere, I can get your musky scent on me. I can feel your face once more and I know... I know that those times are not just a dream. They were real.
I'm ready. Put me back in the box, buddy. You can forget about me now. I love you so much, no matter what you do to me.
Huh? What's with that look? Come on, you won't say your boyfriend look bad in me, would you? Everybody said he grew on me! You judgmental woman! And it's the last time he's gonna wear me, too! Oooh! If only I could move I would wrap my sleeves over your dumb face and-
"Hey babe?"
"Ummm... what?"
"You look hot in that."
-strangle you... And... excuse me? Did you just...
"Really?"
You damn idiot, that's a classy, beautiful, amazing, brilliant, kind woman standing in front of you and that's the best comeback you can think of? Shame. On. You.
"Really."
"Well, I suppose we'd have to do something about this, then. Do you have some idea?"
"Mmmm. It could use some good washing. And some tender care for the ripped seams. And a new zipper, too. Well, at any rate you'd have to take it off first."
"Okay."
"Then we'll proceed with taking some other items of clothing off."
"Yes ma'am," i heard you say as you close in for a deep kiss. Then you take me off.
Oopsie daisie. Time to close my eyes! Not that I'm jealous, mind you! Like all clothes, I know. When the time comes, I'll be taken off. That's the fun part, really. Putting us on and taking us off. From you... from the shoulder of someone you love. I know I'd be forgotten for awhile, at least as you made love with that special one who you love and obviously love you very much. That's fine, too. I can wait. I've waited.
But this time, my silence won't be as long. I'd have your warmth inside me soon, I'd rub your skin again, I'd smell of you again. I'll accompany you to the bar where the beer and smoke sticks to me and you'd be forced to wash me by your girl. To the rain, where the cold and wet will soak me and you'd dry me up. Maybe you'd lent me to her in the movies to keep her warm. Maybe I'd dry her tears when she lean to your shoulder someday. It doesn't matter.
You see, my life is all about waiting for you to grow on me.
P.S.: oh! oh! Almost forgot! Here's a kiss from your mom... *smooch*
P.P.S.: ...and here's from me, buddy. zip 'em up and you can have it!
*zzzzziiip!*
*smooch!*
I love you!
14 November 2015
J. Diva S.
Your hand have grown since i last felt it, I can tell. Your footsteps are heavier, too. I wonder how your face would look like after all these years. Secretly, I long to know how you smell have grown. That's all I dared to hope. One last feel of your hand, one last look at your face, one last embrace so I could remember your scent. Then I could lay here, forgotten, until the mites and moths could eat away my remaining dignity.
Now you are getting closer. Do you feel me calling for you? I hope you would. I've been so excited now, I can't think of what would happen if you decided not to open my box. But you put me in a nice, old wooden box- didn't you? I know you did. You just got to open a box as wonderful as mine, right? But what if you only came here to look for another thing? Another piece of clothing, perhaps? Suddenly I felt silly for hoping. Maybe you won't find me after all...
For a moment, all is silent except your breathing. I really hope your phone wouldn't ring. If it does, then you'd pick it up and leave me. But it would, wouldn't it? I mean, you're always so busy and so popular and so successful... I just know it'd ring any second now.
Then you shatter and throw away my worry by opening my box. Your hands are so violent, as always. It's as if you were angry at something. I've never been more grateful for that little flaw of yours.
Good God, you've grown so handsome! Oh! Look at you! You actually grew a beard? It suits you! Oh... I wish you could hear what I say now. Heyheyheyhey! Do you remember me? It's me!! It's not like I'm those kind of T-shirts that you threw away after a particularly filthy day, it's me! I missed you so much buddy... You've grown so much!
Oh.
Damn. You've grown. Look, buddy it's not like I ever hoped you'd pick me up and start wearing me again. It's been years. I totally never thought about that. Honestly. Well... maybe a little bit, a tiny ray of hope but I'm totally fine with that not happening. I just want to see you again before you left me forever. One more time is fine... and this is my one more time, right? I should be thankful for this. ****, i'm totally not crying buddy. Don't have eyes, remember?
Hey, you're smiling! Is it because of me? God, it's been so long since i saw you smile. And your hand... where's it going? OOOOOOH! YES!! YEEEEEEAAAH! YOU PICK ME UP! PLEASEDONTPUTMEDOWNPLEASEDONTPUTMEDOWN not too soon let me just feel your grip on my fabric again pleaseee... aaaah... boy, i've missed you. Now get your face closer... closer...
*COUGH COUGH COUGH*
Ooops. Sorry... Dust. Your wooden box is nice and dry, but dust still comes down through the keyhole... Are you okay? Oh thank goodness. Wait, what's with that face? Oh no... don't put me back please, it's just dust! I bet you can just throw me to the laundry and I'd be in my best in no time! Just yell at your mom to wash me! Or your maid- the one with calloused fingers!
"Hey, what's that you found, babe?"
Whoa whoa whoa. Waaait a minute. Who the hell is that? Never saw her before. Is that... is that your girlfriend? You actually went and get yourself a girlfriend? Well done, buddy! You ladykiller you! She look so charming! I wonder if you give your new jackets to her on cold days to warm her up when she 'forgot' her jacket back home. I bet you do, not that I'd know. I wonder how she fits in them?
"It's my old jacket. A birthday present from mom back in high school."
And you remember! You remember me! I love you! I remember it, too! Your mom was super kind... You know, she wasn't like any other ladies in my shop. Where I'm from, everyone's dressed to the nines. My fellow jackets were, too. They were expensive and they were bought by those men with fancy bow tie and slick shoes... But not your mom, no! I saw her walking, slightly embarrassed. I can relate- that's how I feel around everyone else. I mean, I'm the cheapest jacket in the store! Nobody wants to pick me, nobody! Nobody but her, that is! When she touch me and she looked at the price tag, I was super worried she'd just hung me back and choose something else. But she chose me! I remember her folding me real careful and putting me in a nice box with those cool red ribbons.
I remember her passing a kiss for you through me! Did you know that? Did she tell you? It was right on the inside of the collar. She whispered that it was for luck. Every time you put me on, I sent you her kiss. She was a great mom. I wonder how is she?
"I couldn't bring myself to wear it after mom passed away. It's been over five years."
Oh no... Oh no... She died? ****. I'm so sorry, kid. I didn't know... so that's why you cried so hard when you put me in here? Poor man. She loves you so much, and I know you love her so much. I wonder why it hurts for me, too? I don't have a heart, or a voice. I can't move, but i want to hold you so tight, kid... I'm so sad for you, too. I wish you know that.
"It's a very handsome jacket. She must've worked hard for this."
"This is her one month's salary. I never found out how she could afford it."
With love and hard work, I suppose. That's what it means to be a mom.
"Wanna try it on, babe?"
"Yeah."
*fainted* Oh. My. God. You're gonna... You're gonna... You're gonna try me... On? Okay. O-Kay. Wait a minute, this is my big chance of getting back to the wardrobe, right? I need to look perfect on you! Oh, do you have to try it now? Won't you, like, wash me first or something? Some ironing can't hurt! Oh damn, what if... what if I don't look good on you anymore? Or would it be better that way? I don't want to make you sad every time you see me, either... maybe it would be better to stay in this box. Would it make you happy? Happier? Happy-ish?
Whoops. Okay, you got me up. I'm sorry for being so dusty and old and musty... Please just give me a chance. Please don't change your mind. I can't get back to the box. I just can't. Not after this, not after seeing you...
"It was always a bit too big for me, actually. I wonder how it fits now?"
"I think it's gonna be a bit tight-- hey, what's with that hole?"
"Oh, I did that. I was hanging around with some buddies back then. We were climbing a mountain up north..."
Right! The mountain trail! You almost didn't bring me along. But I was fresh from the laundry and you need an extra warm jacket because the weather said it'd get reaaally cold. And it was! You were lucky you found me in time, you'd freeze without me! See, I saved your life! Didn't save you from getting cut though. I remember that jackass who obviously thought taking a selfie on a narrow path on the edge of a cliff is a great idea. I remember the fall, we rolled down that cliff and you cut your sides on a sharp stone. When your muscles tore i felt no pain, but when the moisture from your blood soaks in my threads... I was so scared. There must be half a litre of blood coming out before your guide reach you.
Do you remember what you said when he finished patching you up? It was the first time I really fell for you, you know. You said, "Do you think it'd leave a mark?" Your guide said, "Well, yeah. It's a pretty deep cut." But then you said to him, "Oh damn. It's my favorite jacket."
I know, I know. Your head must've been hit pretty hard. I love you anyway. Especially after we reach civilization. I remember you asking the local store for some thread and needles. And you can't even sew! Maybe you're just desperate to get me fixed. I'm positive your mom would kill you if she ever saw the wound.
I got another ripped seam when you were smaller and you fight your first fight. You were sixteen and you thought you could fight without removing your jacket. We won that day, but i grumbled the whole way home. If only you could hear me. I made sure to make your skin as itchy as I could for a week after that. You were acting like a monkey for a week! I laughed so hard... *sigh*
We've been through a lot, didn't we? You took me to amazing places. The warm sands, the cool rains, gentle waves and strong wind. And the sun! The sun all the way through, the moonlight, too. They feel nice, you know. The moon radiation up there, in an airplane just for you (and me). You've lived in an adventurous journey! And I get to accompany you through all that!
I have no regret, I thought when you push your well muscled arms inside the arm-sleeve. I truly don't. I've had my share of adventure and now I can feel you here: in my soft, silky embrace that has no heat except from you. I can feel you everywhere, I can get your musky scent on me. I can feel your face once more and I know... I know that those times are not just a dream. They were real.
I'm ready. Put me back in the box, buddy. You can forget about me now. I love you so much, no matter what you do to me.
Huh? What's with that look? Come on, you won't say your boyfriend look bad in me, would you? Everybody said he grew on me! You judgmental woman! And it's the last time he's gonna wear me, too! Oooh! If only I could move I would wrap my sleeves over your dumb face and-
"Hey babe?"
"Ummm... what?"
"You look hot in that."
-strangle you... And... excuse me? Did you just...
"Really?"
You damn idiot, that's a classy, beautiful, amazing, brilliant, kind woman standing in front of you and that's the best comeback you can think of? Shame. On. You.
"Really."
"Well, I suppose we'd have to do something about this, then. Do you have some idea?"
"Mmmm. It could use some good washing. And some tender care for the ripped seams. And a new zipper, too. Well, at any rate you'd have to take it off first."
"Okay."
"Then we'll proceed with taking some other items of clothing off."
"Yes ma'am," i heard you say as you close in for a deep kiss. Then you take me off.
Oopsie daisie. Time to close my eyes! Not that I'm jealous, mind you! Like all clothes, I know. When the time comes, I'll be taken off. That's the fun part, really. Putting us on and taking us off. From you... from the shoulder of someone you love. I know I'd be forgotten for awhile, at least as you made love with that special one who you love and obviously love you very much. That's fine, too. I can wait. I've waited.
But this time, my silence won't be as long. I'd have your warmth inside me soon, I'd rub your skin again, I'd smell of you again. I'll accompany you to the bar where the beer and smoke sticks to me and you'd be forced to wash me by your girl. To the rain, where the cold and wet will soak me and you'd dry me up. Maybe you'd lent me to her in the movies to keep her warm. Maybe I'd dry her tears when she lean to your shoulder someday. It doesn't matter.
You see, my life is all about waiting for you to grow on me.
P.S.: oh! oh! Almost forgot! Here's a kiss from your mom... *smooch*
P.P.S.: ...and here's from me, buddy. zip 'em up and you can have it!
*zzzzziiip!*
*smooch!*
I love you!
14 November 2015
J. Diva S.