A Little Bit Of Humour # 148

[Biggus]

ARE YOU WEARING SKINNY JEANS?

Are you wearing skinny jeans?
They are a very skinny pair
But on those lovely slender legs
What else would you wear?

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 338

Baa, baa, black sheep,
Have you any wool?
Yes, sir, yes, sir,
Three bags full;
I can’t get rid of the bloody stuff

ADIDAS IS AN ACRONYM

ADIDAS is an acronym for
"All day I dream about sex"
And by the time I get to bed
I’m suffering from the effects

WHINGING BRITS ABROAD # 3

We went on holiday to Spain
But the shopkeepers couldn’t be lazier
The shops closed in the afternoon
I ran out of fags during the Siesta

I WANTED TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT INDEPENDENCE

I wanted to write a book about independence
About people achieving their destiny
A ground breaking piece of literature
Unfortunately my mum wouldn't let me

WE WENT TO THE LOCAL MULTIPLEX

We went to the local Multiplex
To watch a film called “Anticlimax”
I would have left early if I could
Although the first part was good

MY GIRLFRIEND PASSED OUT

My girlfriend passed out
On the “merry go round”
But she’s alright now, as
What goes around comes around

MY UNCLE’S FAVOURITE TREAT

My uncle’s favourite treat
Is Millionaire’s shortbread
But since he won the lottery
He just calls it shortbread

BEFORE THE WALL CAME DOWN

Before the wall came down, the
East was all about the Warsaw Pact
But since it was demolished, now
The East is empty and that’s a fact

I KNOW THAT PETTY CRIME IS RIFE

I know that petty crime is rife
But how did it come to this
Someone stole my urine sample
And that’s taking the piss

[YesNo]

I liked the acronym one the best. I hear people in Spain take siestas because it is too hot to do anything except take care of tourists during the early afternoon.

[Biggus]

I wouldn't mind a Sieta myself