thewriter9813
01-05-2014, 06:50 AM
Hi, I would really appreciate it if you comment what you think of this short story to help me get a better idea of what people think of my stories. Thank you.
My blood burns as I chase a rabbit through the undergrowth. The trees that stretch out before me come up and then pass in a blur. My paws pound on the ground yet makes no sound; it’s like floating. The dry leaves kick into the air as I pass the twigs and sticks crack on slide on the dirt path. I follow the tiny sound of feet rocketing ahead. The rabbit makes sharp turns in and out of trees, trying to lose my trail. I keep up, staying a ways behind as to keep the chase up. The wind whistles past my ears and I howl to the moon. As the rabbit starts to lose hope it slows and I lift my pace. I didn’t want to kill it. The blood of a wolf burns in my human bones; now, the blood of a human burns in the bones of a wolf. I turn back into my human form slowly. My ears flatten and shape onto the side of my head. The same goes for my nose, except in the front of my face. My eyes turn from a predatory blue to a soft ocean shade. The fur that stood on edge disappears until I’m on my hands and knees in the dirt. I pant in my human form as the lungs of a wolf slowly shrink to fit inside this smaller form. I stand and am glad that I don’t lose my clothes when I change form. Instead of ripping, the clothes disappear and morph into fur. It’s a good job too as the night is chilly. I walk silently using my heightened senses to pick up where I am. I was with my pack picking up speed until I saw the rabbit. I listen to the voices of my inmates and locate where I am. I wasn’t off track. I was a little to the right of them and they were still heading up the hill. I was already there and but I walk over to the left. I cross Brandy as I reach them. He is changing form from a silver-grey wolf to his tall and muscular self. All the werewolf men were muscular and the girls were strong too. It came with the genes and the abilities; a good form and senses to run and hunt in. I stand next to Brandy until he is fully upright and then I walk on, alongside him, to our pack leader. He stood within a crest of trees in front of all of us. It was the first chase we’ve had since the Full Moon two months past. The rain and the snow had been keeping us indoors and in our human form. The stars above twinkled and a soft breeze stirred my bones as we welcomed our newly changed. They would soon fall into the ranks and into the routine. They would soon learn of the other paranormal beings that run with us and learn of the treaties that have been in place since the start of our War. The night air was bliss and the sense of freedom welcoming. I will sleep well tonight.
My blood burns as I chase a rabbit through the undergrowth. The trees that stretch out before me come up and then pass in a blur. My paws pound on the ground yet makes no sound; it’s like floating. The dry leaves kick into the air as I pass the twigs and sticks crack on slide on the dirt path. I follow the tiny sound of feet rocketing ahead. The rabbit makes sharp turns in and out of trees, trying to lose my trail. I keep up, staying a ways behind as to keep the chase up. The wind whistles past my ears and I howl to the moon. As the rabbit starts to lose hope it slows and I lift my pace. I didn’t want to kill it. The blood of a wolf burns in my human bones; now, the blood of a human burns in the bones of a wolf. I turn back into my human form slowly. My ears flatten and shape onto the side of my head. The same goes for my nose, except in the front of my face. My eyes turn from a predatory blue to a soft ocean shade. The fur that stood on edge disappears until I’m on my hands and knees in the dirt. I pant in my human form as the lungs of a wolf slowly shrink to fit inside this smaller form. I stand and am glad that I don’t lose my clothes when I change form. Instead of ripping, the clothes disappear and morph into fur. It’s a good job too as the night is chilly. I walk silently using my heightened senses to pick up where I am. I was with my pack picking up speed until I saw the rabbit. I listen to the voices of my inmates and locate where I am. I wasn’t off track. I was a little to the right of them and they were still heading up the hill. I was already there and but I walk over to the left. I cross Brandy as I reach them. He is changing form from a silver-grey wolf to his tall and muscular self. All the werewolf men were muscular and the girls were strong too. It came with the genes and the abilities; a good form and senses to run and hunt in. I stand next to Brandy until he is fully upright and then I walk on, alongside him, to our pack leader. He stood within a crest of trees in front of all of us. It was the first chase we’ve had since the Full Moon two months past. The rain and the snow had been keeping us indoors and in our human form. The stars above twinkled and a soft breeze stirred my bones as we welcomed our newly changed. They would soon fall into the ranks and into the routine. They would soon learn of the other paranormal beings that run with us and learn of the treaties that have been in place since the start of our War. The night air was bliss and the sense of freedom welcoming. I will sleep well tonight.