edsar27
11-04-2013, 01:11 AM
I am open to critique and criticism. This is my first short story and I want honesty over sugar coating . Thank you and I pray you enjoy
House Full of Light
It is the coldness from within that permeates into the room. The irrevocable facts on which I hang my head on. In the short time of my life never have I felt the utter feeling of loss as I do now. I sit here fixated on the wood paneling. It seems to be some sick joke that what were once living things now line this room. A small ironic smile plays on my lips, the first in many days. Residing in my hands is the only thing that anchors me to this morbid place of now dead trophies. Its name is simply Fate, ever so heavy and cumbersome, silvery with a six –round chamber.
I am seated on the floor, not really seeing the walls but beyond. Truly, I am in a picture show seeing things which were and have ceased to make sense. It is as if I stand above looking down, a deity with no power, only being able to remember. My mind flows forth seeking comfort to overcome the pain that is buried within my very bones.
Before me lies a house full of lights, the air itself a breath of warmth and beauty. I descend into the house, a beggar seeking refuge, and I hear her laughter. Oh how I am mesmerized by blue eyes sparkling with life and love, her long brown hair sweeping back as she prepares the table. Her very presence is a bath of wonderment and delight, how my hand trembles just to touch her. I feel the flickering of my soul trying so hard to reconnect with its other half. My heart tries to find the rhythm of her heart, jumping erratically around in my chest unable to be this close to her. The house full of lights groans at the seams trying desperately to hold in and reflect the love that fills it. Surely if any of this were to cross into the world, it would be irrevocably changed and transformed to a place where guns, violence, and need would vanish.
My hands tighten on Fate as I try in vain to pull myself from her. My very existence feels at stake here. My struggling is futile as i follow her to the kitchen and further immerse myself in her presences. There he stands a different person from a time past. His face shines with a smile of fulfillment. Two hearts beating together, one soul in unison together. She comes up to him tracing her fingers across his neck. I can feel them across mine warm and loving. She rests her head on his shoulder and I can smell the fragrance of woman that I know so well as she says how she loves him. My heart stops beating and I become ice frozen not willing for that moment to continue , but wanting it to never end. My endurance has run its course as I flee from the house full of lights.
Outside i tremble and shake. My knees on the ground, tears streaming marring my face I am unable to stand. Yet her aroma is still in my nostrils, the weight of her head on his shoulders, a comfort to know she is there. The warmth of their love beating brightly, lighting this cruel world with a sun full of acceptance and desire; I reclaim my composure and turn to face that house. It is merely held together by the shared feelings of those within, it simply radiates.
My hand cramps due to the tightness of me holding Fate. Tears pooled and staining my shirt, I lift my head and look across to where their ghostly images haunt my eyes. I have turned every light on trying to desperately to feel as they felt. Can the moon shine without the sun? I can hear the voices of destruction calling me, inviting me to raise Fate and join them. Their promises like honey and tea warming me, promises of being with her forever in my own world. I look down at Fate, so justly named, knowing that whatever I command it will do. Fate, my protector, my anchor and now my ender?
I raise my eyes once more and look at all the lights filling this house in a poor imitation of what was once here. My legs lift me up and I go to the mirror in which she had stood in front of so many times. Feeling my hands encircling her, wrapping her up and burying my face in her hair, softly kissing her neck. Tasting who she is on my lips, I now stare at it alone with only Fate to comfort me. Fate in my hands I slowly raise, my skin tingling and time slows down. Those voices pressing my mind , I feel Fate rest coldly on my temple. My heart is calm and I am not afraid. Fate in my hands in this house no longer full of light, I see her behind me. Her voice of love echoes louder and stronger, her eyes filling me with life and the will to banish those voices. A voice of comfort in this maelstrom of despair, I read her lips, feeling them brush my ear. The warmth of her body that is not there refills me with love to endure. Tears well in my eyes and I know this is not my destiny as I lower Fate and laugh knowing more now than before.
I go to each room reliving the moments we had together. Laughter echoing and bouncing around me filling empty spaces with beautiful memories . I turn off the lights one by one, closing doors in my heart and finding my soul. To remember the love shared is a mark of gratitude for the time we had together. To accept the loss is to heal the rendered life. As I return to our room and turn off the final light I face the darkness boldly. My body lays down to rest , my hand lays Fate beside me . I close my eyes, returning to my house full of lights.
House Full of Light
It is the coldness from within that permeates into the room. The irrevocable facts on which I hang my head on. In the short time of my life never have I felt the utter feeling of loss as I do now. I sit here fixated on the wood paneling. It seems to be some sick joke that what were once living things now line this room. A small ironic smile plays on my lips, the first in many days. Residing in my hands is the only thing that anchors me to this morbid place of now dead trophies. Its name is simply Fate, ever so heavy and cumbersome, silvery with a six –round chamber.
I am seated on the floor, not really seeing the walls but beyond. Truly, I am in a picture show seeing things which were and have ceased to make sense. It is as if I stand above looking down, a deity with no power, only being able to remember. My mind flows forth seeking comfort to overcome the pain that is buried within my very bones.
Before me lies a house full of lights, the air itself a breath of warmth and beauty. I descend into the house, a beggar seeking refuge, and I hear her laughter. Oh how I am mesmerized by blue eyes sparkling with life and love, her long brown hair sweeping back as she prepares the table. Her very presence is a bath of wonderment and delight, how my hand trembles just to touch her. I feel the flickering of my soul trying so hard to reconnect with its other half. My heart tries to find the rhythm of her heart, jumping erratically around in my chest unable to be this close to her. The house full of lights groans at the seams trying desperately to hold in and reflect the love that fills it. Surely if any of this were to cross into the world, it would be irrevocably changed and transformed to a place where guns, violence, and need would vanish.
My hands tighten on Fate as I try in vain to pull myself from her. My very existence feels at stake here. My struggling is futile as i follow her to the kitchen and further immerse myself in her presences. There he stands a different person from a time past. His face shines with a smile of fulfillment. Two hearts beating together, one soul in unison together. She comes up to him tracing her fingers across his neck. I can feel them across mine warm and loving. She rests her head on his shoulder and I can smell the fragrance of woman that I know so well as she says how she loves him. My heart stops beating and I become ice frozen not willing for that moment to continue , but wanting it to never end. My endurance has run its course as I flee from the house full of lights.
Outside i tremble and shake. My knees on the ground, tears streaming marring my face I am unable to stand. Yet her aroma is still in my nostrils, the weight of her head on his shoulders, a comfort to know she is there. The warmth of their love beating brightly, lighting this cruel world with a sun full of acceptance and desire; I reclaim my composure and turn to face that house. It is merely held together by the shared feelings of those within, it simply radiates.
My hand cramps due to the tightness of me holding Fate. Tears pooled and staining my shirt, I lift my head and look across to where their ghostly images haunt my eyes. I have turned every light on trying to desperately to feel as they felt. Can the moon shine without the sun? I can hear the voices of destruction calling me, inviting me to raise Fate and join them. Their promises like honey and tea warming me, promises of being with her forever in my own world. I look down at Fate, so justly named, knowing that whatever I command it will do. Fate, my protector, my anchor and now my ender?
I raise my eyes once more and look at all the lights filling this house in a poor imitation of what was once here. My legs lift me up and I go to the mirror in which she had stood in front of so many times. Feeling my hands encircling her, wrapping her up and burying my face in her hair, softly kissing her neck. Tasting who she is on my lips, I now stare at it alone with only Fate to comfort me. Fate in my hands I slowly raise, my skin tingling and time slows down. Those voices pressing my mind , I feel Fate rest coldly on my temple. My heart is calm and I am not afraid. Fate in my hands in this house no longer full of light, I see her behind me. Her voice of love echoes louder and stronger, her eyes filling me with life and the will to banish those voices. A voice of comfort in this maelstrom of despair, I read her lips, feeling them brush my ear. The warmth of her body that is not there refills me with love to endure. Tears well in my eyes and I know this is not my destiny as I lower Fate and laugh knowing more now than before.
I go to each room reliving the moments we had together. Laughter echoing and bouncing around me filling empty spaces with beautiful memories . I turn off the lights one by one, closing doors in my heart and finding my soul. To remember the love shared is a mark of gratitude for the time we had together. To accept the loss is to heal the rendered life. As I return to our room and turn off the final light I face the darkness boldly. My body lays down to rest , my hand lays Fate beside me . I close my eyes, returning to my house full of lights.