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DAVESTRUGSTRUG
10-29-2013, 09:37 AM
Recently I took Doctor Who too seriously
Its the fiftieth anniversary this year and
The book I finished explained the very first
Episode went out the day after Kennedy was shot.

I wanted to celebrate Amy Pond played by
Karen Gillan from Inverness pouring dirty
Thoughts into a rather Joycean novel
Running to one-hundred thousand words.

I picked up knowledge the way I pick up
A fallen wet little bag containing the wet
Leaves and my mug of tea standing there
The mug a pink dalek holding the heated water.

Amy and the seventh doctor are having sex
Up near Loch Ness and I swooned writing
The Loch itself was swooning and in the Tardis
Up high the third doctor watching swooning.

Apparently a Canadian got it all going people
Had to occupy a spot between Grandstand
And Juke BoxJury I read the book another book
The locations discussed I wrote I dosed myself.

I was becoming the twentieth doctor I was
Full of galaxies and not much running around about
Travel through time perhaps the Australian in the film
Did it better and Amy kisses well how my tongue stretches.

I am over it now masturbatorial seeing the trees are not
Cybernauts then holding my gut and sensing tonight
The night is mine burgers with cheese and toasted baps
Or just a ruddy brilliant and respected tin of soup.

They were just out to entertain the kids old Sydney Newton
Terry Nation Verity Lambert and kids need their entertainment
She lives in Los Angeles Jon Pertwee wanted more money
Tom Baker looked at bit like Tom Stoppard a little Pan.

Jerrybaldy
10-29-2013, 12:29 PM
Brilliant! I thoroughly enjoyed the read. Not a particular fan of Doctor Who so it's not down to that. I am not a major fan of punctuation in poetry, but your lack of it in such liquid lines of thought left me grasping at times. I just really enjoyed the freedom with which it flowed as if you didnt give a flying one and although you were listing facts at times, it always felt unique, querky and very different from the hoi polloi. Good job!
JB

DAVESTRUGSTRUG
10-30-2013, 08:22 AM
Marvellous! Thanks, Jerrybaldy.

AuntShecky
10-30-2013, 04:38 PM
The opening stanza reads like prose, less poetic than the stanzas which follow. I've nothing against nonce words, but "masturbatorial seeing" doesn't make it. Judicious punctuation would clarify the meaning (though a poem doesn't necessarily have to be ALL about meaning.)

Good try-- and can't fault the originality.

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