New Poems! Comments?

[Carol58175817]

Here are my brand-new poems:

I danced among the birds of paradise,
I felt something I couldn't price.
Freedom and love ran down my spine,
I was going to fly and shine.

When sadness is eating your inside,
lay down by a weeping willow's side.
She will forever weep with you,
for she cries wherever her vines flew.

You are beautiful like a butterfly,
and do not need to brag about being able to fly.
Even if you see others who shine,
Remember you glow from the heart just fine.

Some of my poems may be better than the others, so feel free to comment on all of them, or maybe just one or two. Personal opinions are appreciated, whether they be positive or negative. Advice/s on how the poems could improve would be great. Thank you very much for reading and I will be looking forward to your replies!

[prendrelemick]

The words are all fine, full of new age fluffiness. They are good as far as they go. They feel to me like a start or ending. To turn them into something more worthwhile, you could develop your ideas, examine them, get behind the sentiment, go a bit deeper, take them a bit further, generate some tension .