Under 5MN Unedited Poetry

[cacian]

write a very fast poem without stopping under 5 MN no more. NO EDITING permitted.

blue
grey
blue
grey
alternate
prey
play to it
ray.

[YesNo]

I wonder if this can be done.
I wonder if this could be fun
To dump the drivel from my head
Expecting that it might be read
Expecting that someone might care
About the stuff that lands up there.

[cacian]

I wonder if this can be done.
I wonder if this could be fun
To dump the drivel from my head
Expecting that it might be read
Expecting that someone might care
About the stuff that lands up there.

haha really cool YeNo. I enjoyed ;)

[cacian]

sometime life
can come and go
but i stay and so
that is all that matter
though.

[cacian]

hope is perfect
when it is
near
it feels real
the clouds
could almost
thrill their
coat of air
frill.

[YesNo]

I liked your post #4 the best so far, cacian.


There's coffee waiting in my cup.
It's getting cold. I better drink,
Take in the world, yes, drink it up
And try and then not try to think.

[slipee]

Doing things so fast
is not my usual manner
laughing will not last
like grass beneath lantana
a shadow of a doubt
first thought on my mind
and what it's all about
I owe you one (next time)

[slipee]

LoL
Thanks for a challenging thread :)

Naturally the clock was on my mind ^^ but I'm sure we'll have some fun with this.

[cacian]

YesNo thank you I really liked the latest one of yours :)
slipee I enjoyed yours very much it reads so fast it is fluent;)

[cacian]

suppose
i was you
and you were
me
what would you do
if it was true?
I guess I'll
few
the time
I spend thinking of you.
that best I know.

[slipee]

fixated
analysing
but familiarity
is deceiving me
from what
and from which
and how long?
this frayed concoction
this amalgamation
this recipe
you consist of nothing
I know in this world
I can only guess
and when I find you
one thing is certain
you are always the same
if not the same
ball of lint
for whom
I am once again
bemused.

[YesNo]

Nice one, slipee. I didn't expect it was a ball of lint until the end.

[slipee]

Thanks, YesNo :)

I wanted to edit it, but if not for the game it wouldn't have existed :)

...most annoying full stop at the end too. I think it was a reflex right before I clicked Post! At the same time I'm glad I have to leave it alone.

[prendrelemick]

The dilemma of a falling man

Aaaaaargh
said the man falling in the abyss
should he draw breath
and start another?
has he time?
Or should he carry on
With the one he's started,
Life is full of dilemmas.

[Jack of Hearts]

An Empty Building

These cornerstones will know no cracks,
and between the walls hold empty space;

the silent parish, the wooden racks
and rose and silver, and gold and grace.

[Jack of Hearts]

There's coffee waiting in my cup.
It's getting cold. I better drink,
Take in the world, yes, drink it up
And try and then not try to think.

Handsome!





J

[YesNo]

Thanks, Jack of Hearts. The ending in yours with "gold and grace" nicely pairs words I thought wouldn't be paired except by alliteration. Prendrelemick's dilemma will linger in my mind longer than the five minutes it took to write it. Should it become my dilemma, I've decided to try to carry on.

[2X2E5]

Strange is the day,
pretending to light candles,
and this poem will take 5MN
and 13 seconds. For you and
for me.
Try singing with a mouth
full of water.
Look at and out the window and see
the dreams drawn in movies.
Picture yourself surrounded by kids,
and imitating 'fun'.
Intentions have love; little doubt.
Say good bye to being loud.

[2X2E5]

By the end of this poem
I will have cheated.
I will have exceeded
the time you conceited.
To feel my life as though it
were vice,
I will have edited one sentence
twice!
Can you figure or can you guess,
which sentence I'd love to take
home and undress?
I'm just kidding and I feel shame
for treating my words like a game;
I'm still lured by getting fame.
Forgive me please, for being a tease.
Nevermind don't forgive, just critique
me and laugh.
I've one more minute to spend,
and I will think of more until the end.
Phack.
Sheet.
I'm running low.
Hope this poem will have a 30 second
GLOW.

[YesNo]

Thirty seconds, all I need
To catch your kiss
That lets me feed
Upon your face that I now miss
Upon your lips that I would kiss.
Just thirty seconds more, I plead.

[prendrelemick]

By the end of this poem
I will have cheated.
I will have exceeded
the time you conceited.
To feel my life as though it
were vice,
I will have edited one sentence
twice!
Can you figure or can you guess,
which sentence I'd love to take
home and undress?
I'm just kidding and I feel shame
for treating my words like a game;
I'm still lured by getting fame.
Forgive me please, for being a tease.
Nevermind don't forgive, just critique
me and laugh.
I've one more minute to spend,
and I will think of more until the end.
Phack.
Sheet.
I'm running low.
Hope this poem will have a 30 second
GLOW.

Brilliant!



and a bit weird!

[jajdude]

Are we allowed to think a bit beforehand,
Or change a thing we write, if we have to make the five minute mark?
Or must we just go, unrehearsed, on the spot with whatever verse
Pops up in our heads. Hey, that on the spot part sounds familiar.

[2X2E5]

I'm not entirely certain myself, but I think it would be more interesting to write it on the spot and unrehearsed.
Flow like River.

[YesNo]

I think its best to let it flow,
Forget about the critic though
It might sound better with some thought
Or editing if you're not caught.

[2X2E5]

@Pendrelemick, thanks:) What you do like about it (what thoughts or feelings do you get from it)?

hUmmm:
These words are getting in the way
of what I want to express today.
Through them nothing will make sense,
but I will murmur and maybe someone
will be impressed and undress.

Tap your knee three times on the
cold earth ground,
Your touch reach the Core,
and gave some an extra heart
beat.

It's not meant to be understood,
for like I said, my words today
play the Ace and Jack of a absurd.


(now I gotta admit, I edited, had to delete "-ed" from "touch"

[YesNo]

Four lines is all that I can do
And then I guess I best be through.
Some think that four is not so many.
Some wish I hadn't written any.

[2X2E5]

Seven of unfamiliar faces,
philosophy majors make
the six on dices turn into
a sad smiley face.
Five hipsters will be drowned,
but I don't care four them.
This triangle of repetition
has got my nuts inching,
but what can I play
when you're two step away
from being my one and only
lover.
Zero zero one, one zero, one
I'm done.

[slipee]

Smiling, laughing inwardly
not pegs but pliers
holding my jeans on the line
kinking wires and segmented
side winding and expired
Drying in a draught
Easter's easterlies rap to the Venetian beat
Pigeons selling their conspiracies
their wicked beaks
and incredulous settlements
their conceptual investments
always tight lipped muttering
before they take flight
white **** on the guttering
on the ledges, the awnings
Who'd climb to clean it?
Not I.
Let the weather rub it out
like the mascara of degradation
smearing scars in desecration
going further costs dignity
but where there's a will there's a way
and where there's a will
there's inheritance
always scheming while they wait
while they wait they flutter
in my rooftop, ****ting
sitting, ****ting, and wishing
that I'll slip into the precipice
that my toes will point at the ceiling
twitching morse code
conceding my riches
before I have time to reconsider

[YesNo]

Alice tells me to write because
she's my muse and she is getting
tired with my low level of output
but I don't think it's so bad
considering how uncooperative
she's been insisting I don't edit
anything and do it all in five minutes
but I'm not in control and so
I start.


Sunny day
Come let's play
By the way....

Come on, Alice, what's next?
I can't continue like this. Give
me something better than this drivel.


Oh my God
Life's so odd

Really? Is that all you can come
up with? Clock's ticking. I've got
less than a minute to go. Oh no.
I can't think of anything....10,9,8...
Oh, no! Oh...

[prendrelemick]

"Don't come in till 9" he crackled down the phone,
An unexpected hour,
To waste as I like
Here are the last 5 minutes.

[2X2E5]

Hi my name is David
and I'm addicted to
collecting books..
Your honour, I understand
I'm guilty and accused
of never reading them.
I will plead and explain
that this addiction helps
cope with my life's pain.
Its easy to buy beautiful
covers and beautiful names,
beautiful ideas – in that there
is no shame; its easy to spend
someone elses dime,
on a “craft” that takes up
an indefinite source of time.
Please make your verdit
and recollect that my crime
causes no harm
Its a meager desire to build
a book farm.

[prendrelemick]

Well wha do you know
Who would've guessed it
I've had my breakfast
but can't digest it
For the cat's on the wrong side of the door.
She'll woaw and mew
and not let me rest
Till I rise and admit
the unwanted guest.

[2X2E5]

When morality meets reality
I'll met you on the dark blue
side of the wave and my plate.

When my second hand fades
behind the condensed window
my hue will face the tracks.

When blackness around takes
strength and makes of itself a
wool blanket and a evaporating

shadow.

I'll be tip toeing on park benches.

[2X2E5]

Well wha do you know
Who would've guessed it
I've had my breakfast
but can't digest it
For the cat's on the wrong side of the door.
She'll woaw and mew
and not let me rest
Till I rise and admit
the unwanted guest.

I liked the sense of the poems but felt that between "digest it" and what proceeds, there's no bridge. Its like a giant leap from one idea to another making the object of the cat had to understand at first. But I like and relate the description of the conflict with the cat :)

I've read some of your poems on different forums...love em :)

[slipee]

By the fifth, if I am done
May you pull the string
See it undone
For in my wake, if by design
Your social demeanor
Dismantles mine
But that's ok, it's mine to wear
Accessorise me
This guest with no chair
Oh so naive! I am, after all
Run-of-the-mill Bill
Who tried to stand tall

[cacian]

tick
tock
tick
tock
I want to write
against
the clock
I assure you it is
a crock
I can hear myself
spoke.

[YesNo]

tick
tock
tick
tock
I want to write
against
the clock
I assure you it is
a crock
I can hear myself
spoke.

Nice one. Here's my thoughts inspired from your poem.


Why Going Back In Time Makes Makes No Sense

Against the clock I go 'tick tock'.
It mocks me when it goes 'tock tick'.
Unsynchronize me from this clock
Or tick and tock when I go 'tick'.

[cacian]

YesNo thank you your piece is fun too :D

[DocHeart]

I was hoping
After one year
You wouldn't
Be posting
Anymore

But here
Come threads
And annoying
Children
Babbling around
The dinner table

[prendrelemick]

when I walk these hills
I feel my roots strike
down into the earth
with each step.

[cacian]

tennis
the raquet
aims high
but the ball
stays lies
from the ground
to the skies
bounce
bounce
not allowed.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

We have a new puppy,
her name is Isis,
she paws at her water
a messy crisis.

[cacian]

a little idea float
in my head
I could had
if it was not for instead.

[prendrelemick]

We have a new puppy,
her name is Isis,
she paws at her water
a messy crisis.

That Puppy you wrote o',
we'd like a photo.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

That Puppy you wrote o',
we'd like a photo.

Let's head over to the bar.

[cacian]

clear as a diamond
seer
amen but don't fear

[slipee]

Whatever my brain suggests
I quickly insert and do not contest
Sometimes, well most times, it's clear
I miss the point and for that I'm revered
It's a wondrous thing some might say
Subconscious texts; devoid all delay
Be warned though I stress, no I YELL!
Whatever your mood; we can tell

[2X2E5]

Without the abrasion of my English,
my poetry would sound quite pinkish.
I'd love to bit an orange and taste sour
lemon, but for now let's party until 11,
in the morning until our jokes become
corny, and our neglected vinyls start to
melt, and remember all the times we once
were pushing down the stairs by what we
felt. A melted kinder suprise egg in my pocket,
we'll split it among us 7, and play a miming
game to help us wipe the chocolate glued to
our whiskers. Maybe we'll get frisky, and
fall asleep between the cushions of the couch.
Light some candles and close the shades,
and let's read half way through Pushkin's
queen of spades. We'll order pizza, and spill
some pop, dance to Dubstep, until the neighbours
hesitate to call the cops. But they wont, because
we've been good for so many years. Pews and mews
get ready to sweat, the whiskeys here, so out
go our fears. No parents at home, since 2002,
no sniffing glue from the corridor where I met
you. Cheers! And lets play oligopoly.