ode to a summer day in the Ardennes

[DieterM]

the high sun nuzzles verdant hills,
grass and bushes wave in ripples,
and cattle is always grazing,
far away or near, in the shadows
of some half-forgotten trees

overgrown paths lure us
into shady forests where squirrels
shyly nibble hazelnuts, where fauns and elves
sing hush-hush songs and dance
with light and rustling steps

we stroll through golden valleys
that softly rise and fall, following brooks
and serenely flowing canals,
to the sound of coos and bird whistles
and combine harvesters

we wander down the main street
of a village where humble houses
made of yellow stone wait for rain
under their black slated roofs

and each evening, we feast on boar and deer
and cakes sweetened with the honey
of countless may-bees,
and each day, we forget and live

[cafolini]

Beautiful poetry. The God-given ability to forget and live is one of the main gifts one can have and cherish.

[mahmod qabaga]

hi dear


wonderful poet , shine as stars among sky

[Hawkman]

Probably not a good idea to mention shy nibbling squirrels, fauns and elves.... The Twee Claxon sounds and the poem dives, only to be robustly depth-charged by passing critics! :D S2 is expendable.

Live and be well - H

[blank|verse]

'Shall I compare thee...'

There are some wonderful moments in this poem, Dieter, although I'm not keen on stanza 2 - bit too much of the old vin plonk perhaps, when you wrote that? ;)

Stanzas 5 and 6 redeem things though, and the poem ends on a rather philosophical moment that is delicately achieved; it's not heavy-handed in any way, and remains open to interpretation. It also introduces a touch of irony; that the observant poet who has created this detailed piece remembers to live in the moment, as it were, appreciating life but not dwelling too much in the past.

Just some minor points: it struck me the image in line 3: 'and cattle is always grazing' sounds a bit too busy in context. I wonder if something like: 'cattle graze noiselessly' or 'grazing cattle sway lazily' might better reflect the ennui of the scene.

And I thought the introduction of the 'combine harvesters' was a bit out of place, after the more typical birds calls; partly it's just having the flat noun itself, I wonder if it could be softened by describing their sound first: 'the rustling threshing of the combine harvesters' or something? (Even then, I'm not sure about the inclusion of 'combine harvester', the action they perform is quite violent; Seamus Heaney utilised this quality in his poem 'The Baler' (http://www.theguardian.com/books/2010/oct/09/forward-prize-poetry-seamus-heaney), which has a more ominous tone, and brings with it connotations of a different kind of reaping.)

Anyway, overall it's an enjoyably detailed and wonderfully observed poem, Dieter.

[DieterM]

Geez, guilty for committing stanza #2 while being perfectly sober! I see what you dislike about it, maybe it's because unicorns, witches, dragons and dwarves are missing? LOL I think I'll rewrite this one, or take it out completely.

Anyway, the cattle-bit is not so accomplished yet either, nor is the combine harvester bit, I admit. On a very personal level, I do find the c.h.-sound rather reassuring, heard from a distance, like lawn mowers or airplanes. They will always remind, for one reason or another, of high summer…

As I'm back to work, and painstakingly sober ever since I've left the lovely Ardennes (if you have the chance, do visit that region; there are hardly any tourists, which is really nice. Mut make sure you'll have fine weather, though, because when it rains there, the place can be rather bleak), you'll have to wait until some new inspiration makes me come up with some better replacements.

Btw, dear mahmod qabaga, your words have been very very welcome! Which writer doesn't cherish a nice compliment from time to time? I plead guilty again…

Thanks for commenting anyway, everybody. Your input always helps me see things in new light!

[hannah_arendt]

Congratulations Dieter :)

[Haunted]

Was going to look up Ardennes but then I have your poem, so why ruin it. What picture can convey half-forgotten trees, what video will show fauns and elves singing and dancing, or else how am I to taste cakes sweetened with the honey / of countless may-bees, except here? So much beauty in these words.

[virtuoso]

I like the juxtaposition of the idylic landscape with the primitive houses. I do like the surrealistic departure in stanza two. Your descriptive words, shady and lure, perfectly set the enchanting scene. This is one of the best poems that has been posted on the site in a while. Congratulations on your well-deserved vacation, because it brought out the real poet that lies within your soul. I am sure that your accompanying muse gave you even more inspiration!