faking orgasms?!

[cacian]

is that more popular then we think? apparently men fake it too according to a survey. I have never faked it I admit.
I ask how it that since a female would know if a man has had orgasms or not due to the evidence.
my thoughts are these:

Is orgasm necessary in order for sex to fulfil?
and most importantly
WHY do people feel the need to fake it? what is the idea behind it?

any views are most welcome :)

[tonywalt]

Is it necessary for you?

[MementoMori]

I ask how it that since a female would know if a man has had orgasms or not due to the evidence.


I guess it depends if he's wearing a condom. I've never known a woman to hold one up and inspect the contents or the lack thereof...



Is orgasm necessary in order for sex to fulfil?


I don't think so; not every time.

[cacian]

Is it necessary for you?

For me not it is not but I guess for a man it is a different ball game.
I should have really asked is why do people feel the need to fake it?


I guess it depends if he's wearing a condom. I've never known a woman to hold one up and inspect the contents or the lack thereof...

No a way!!! :nonod:what a joy killer that is truly off putting to say the least and yes I agree I forgot about the condom :p


I don't think so; not every time.
I think for a man it is a bit difficult but then I am not sure... I heard people say that some can have an orgasm but without the content which is kind of intriguing...I do not know I was told about it.

[lilimarlene]

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/38006774/ns/health-sexual_health/t/sorry-guys-percent-women-admit-faking-it/

and yes, I have faked it.

[cacian]

may I ask why you have?

[AuntShecky]

Don't you have better things to do?
Why aren't you reading?

Get thee to a library.
Go.

[Calidore]

IMO, faking orgasm equals failure--not on the part of the faker's partner to bring him/her to orgasm, but on the part of the faker to simply communicate. If you need your partner to do something, say something: "Oh, God, [insert instruction(s) here]!"

And sometimes an orgasm just isn't there. That's fine; it happens. So instead of letting your partner waste time and energy going for an unreachable goal, tell him/her that it's not going to happen this time, it's not their fault, and that doesn't mean they have to stop.

Like a book, sex is about much more than just the ending. And just as reading a book doesn't become pointless if you already know the ending, sex doesn't become pointless just because one or both people won't reach an ending this time. In fact, it may be even better, because you can just relax and play and enjoy more what you're doing right now.

[Delta40]

For me not it is not but I guess for a man it is a different ball game.

That's the most intelligent thing you've said :hurray:

[islandclimber]

Confusion reigns here. Cacian, you start a thread about faking orgasms and then proceed to tell this entire community that you have not faked an orgasm; yet sex and vulgarity in literature are distasteful?

[Lokasenna]

I think any doubt that we are dealing with a particularly relentless troll is evaporating quickly. I am totally convinced of it.

For a start, this board is supposed to be family friendly - this topic, and many others that you have started in the past, are in breach of that. Then there is, as has been pointed out, the hypocrisy of it all - sex in literature is distasteful, but you want us to discuss the mechanics of our sex lives on the internet? I remember there being similar threads, created by yourself, wanting to know whether we found sex dirty, and wanting to know what our fetishes are. And then in your other nonsense threads you present this facade of naive idiocy. Confusing, no?

[cacian]

Confusion reigns here. Cacian, you start a thread about faking orgasms and then proceed to tell this entire community that you have not faked an orgasm; yet sex and vulgarity in literature are distasteful?

Sex is not distasteful what is is writing about in a manner that makes it sound distasteful that is. Vulgarity is not needed in literature because the point of writing and reading is to improve are our spoken world at least that is how I see . Writing abuse language is distasteful because it comes across as vulgar.

[cacian]

IMO, faking orgasm equals failure--not on the part of the faker's partner to bring him/her to orgasm, but on the part of the faker to simply communicate. If you need your partner to do something, say something: "Oh, God, [insert instruction(s) here]!"
Agreed. I am thinking whether this is simply psychological and that there is a deeper issue behind it. I think it can become a stigma if one is not careful.


And sometimes an orgasm just isn't there. That's fine; it happens. So instead of letting your partner waste time and energy going for an unreachable goal, tell him/her that it's not going to happen this time, it's not their fault, and that doesn't mean they have to stop.
Absolutely. I think talking about is can help solve the situation and brushing it under the carpet is not the answer. I feel lots of people feel inadequate and helpless because these issue that matter the most about sex are not spoken about or aired.


Like a book, sex is about much more than just the ending. And just as reading a book doesn't become pointless if you already know the ending, sex doesn't become pointless just because one or both people won't reach an ending this time. In fact, it may be even better, because you can just relax and play and enjoy more what you're doing right now.
Indeed. There is more to sexual relationship then just the ending. Intimacy has many levels which are also important.

[hannah_arendt]

What do you think about G.R.R Martin`s writing? I was a little bit irritated the way how she uses sex scenes.

[cacian]

I think any doubt that we are dealing with a particularly relentless troll is evaporating quickly. I am totally convinced of it.

For a start, this board is supposed to be family friendly - this topic, and many others that you have started in the past, are in breach of that. Then there is, as has been pointed out, the hypocrisy of it all - sex in literature is distasteful, but you want us to discuss the mechanics of our sex lives on the internet? I remember there being similar threads, created by yourself, wanting to know whether we found sex dirty, and wanting to know what our fetishes are. And then in your other nonsense threads you present this facade of naive idiocy. Confusing, no?

Well I feel this is no different then talking about impotence lots of people suffer from it but have not got the courage to talk about it.
Discussing issues such as these related to sex is better then writing about in a story to give it glamour and show bizz when the reality of it less then that if not worse is distasteful.

[cacian]

What do you think about G.R.R Martin`s writing? I was a little bit irritated the way how she uses sex scenes.

Are we talking of GRR Martin as HE? the fantasy/horror/science fiction writer.
I read there is sex violence and moral ambiguity but I am not very familiar with his style of sex scenes.
What is irritating about it?

[stlukesguild]

Sex is not distasteful what is is writing about in a manner that makes it sound distasteful that is. Vulgarity is not needed in literature because the point of writing and reading is to improve are our spoken world at least that is how I see . Writing abuse language is distasteful because it comes across as vulgar.

Who deems what is or is not distasteful or vulgar? It would seem you assume it is you, just as it is you who determine what the point of writing and reading is.

[Emil Miller]

I think any doubt that we are dealing with a particularly relentless troll is evaporating quickly. I am totally convinced of it.

For a start, this board is supposed to be family friendly - this topic, and many others that you have started in the past, are in breach of that. Then there is, as has been pointed out, the hypocrisy of it all - sex in literature is distasteful, but you want us to discuss the mechanics of our sex lives on the internet? I remember there being similar threads, created by yourself, wanting to know whether we found sex dirty, and wanting to know what our fetishes are. And then in your other nonsense threads you present this facade of naive idiocy. Confusing, no?

Cacian joined in Nov 2011 and, 18 months on, has just posted THREAD No.500. If anyone is still in any doubt about trolling, perhaps some form of therapy might be considered. For those who don't ignore the obvious, there's no need to :brickwall, but simply put the offender on your ignore list and avoid seeing swathes of pink avatars when going into the New Posts section.

[cacian]

Cacian joined in Nov 2011 and, 18 months on, has just posted THREAD No.500. If anyone is still in any doubt about trolling, perhaps some form of therapy might be considered. For those who don't ignore the obvious, there's no need to :brickwall, but simply put the offender on your ignore list and avoid seeing swathes of pink avatars when going into the New Posts section.

Ok I am not a troll and if you think that I am then maybe therapy is for you.
And please do not refer to me as an offender it is unnecessary and really inadequate.


Sex is not distasteful what is is writing about in a manner that makes it sound distasteful that is. Vulgarity is not needed in literature because the point of writing and reading is to improve are our spoken world at least that is how I see . Writing abuse language is distasteful because it comes across as vulgar.

Who deems what is or is not distasteful or vulgar? It would seem you assume it is you, just as it is you who determine what the point of writing and reading is.

By distasteful I mean violent or degrading. Vulgar as in unpleasant to the naked eye. I mean I do not enjoy being sworn at in real life and therefore I find it unpleasant when I come across in literature. I feel one ought to draw the line between what is realistic and what is not and I think literature's role is to do that to uplift and change ways for the better. To recourse to vulgarity or violence in art because that is the only way one gets a thrill is in my view short sighted. Again that is my opinion and I am sure you will oppose this and that is fine.

[cafolini]

Cacian joined in Nov 2011 and, 18 months on, has just posted THREAD No.500. If anyone is still in any doubt about trolling, perhaps some form of therapy might be considered. For those who don't ignore the obvious, there's no need to :brickwall, but simply put the offender on your ignore list and avoid seeing swathes of pink avatars when going into the New Posts section.

Follow your own advice, Miller. LOL

[Emil Miller]

Follow your own advice, Miller. LOL

OK. I have now added you to the ignore list.

[Calidore]

Is "troll" a new label du jour now, where everyone who does something their own way is trolling? Cacian asks whatever question comes into her head to start discussions. On a discussion forum.

It's ironic to me that a few people are now clogging up these threads with off-topic posts complaining about the existence of the threads, which makes me picture pieces of paper stating "Do not litter" strewn over the ground.

[Emil Miller]

Is "troll" a new label du jour now, where everyone who does something their own way is trolling? Cacian asks whatever question comes into her head to start discussions. On a discussion forum.

It's ironic to me that a few people are now clogging up these threads with off-topic posts complaining about the existence of the threads, which makes me picture pieces of paper stating "Do not litter" strewn over the ground.

Its precisely because Cacian's input is so voluminous and vacuous that the forum is already littered with threads and posts that are the written equivalent of psychobabble. Anyhow, I've mentioned the solution to it so for my part it's no longer a problem.

[cafolini]

Its precisely because Cacian's input is so voluminous and vacuous that the forum is already littered with threads and posts that are the written equivalent of psychobabble. Anyhow, I've mentioned the solution to it so for my part it's no longer a problem.

But you keep going and going with it. Ridiculous.

[kaethe]

The whole tread is very funny to read...I did it with amazement!

[Scheherazade]

~

Since it is no longer serving its original purpose

-whatever that might have been-

this thread will now be closed.

Please do not discuss each other

and

feel free to add anyone you find disagreeable to your Ignore List.

~