Biggus
02-15-2013, 08:13 AM
CHARITABLE BEQUEST REQUESTS # 1
The Red Cross are getting greedy
Not happy to just milk me in life
They want me to will them a percentage
Of what should go to my wife
A MAN IN A HOT AIR BALLOON # 1
A Man in a hot air balloon
Has lost his bearings
As he slowly floated by
He looks down below
And shouts to a man
“Hello, Where am I”?
“Are you completely mad?”
The man shouted back
“You’re floating in the sky”
THE DEPENDABLE FIG ROLL
The dependable Fig Roll
Or Fig Newton if you must
As one of your five a day
It’s an absolute must
THE HEDGEHOG CULL
The campaigners have won
The Hedgehog cull won’t be done
They argued it shouldn’t go ahead
It was just wrong they said
Saying they were un putdown-able
I think they are just un pickup-able
THE LIFE OF PIE
Off they go to the bakers
For a pie of pork and pickle
Trundling along the road
Riding on their obesecycle
A BITTER PILL
Realisation of my folly comes
As I lay abed at first light
I took a sleeping pill and
A laxative on the same night
ON THEIR OBESECYCLE
On their obesecycle
They have to scurry
Not that the obese
Are able to hurry
They can still walk
Though they don’t bovver
And they are so fat
That they appear to hover
DON’T KEEP THINGS BOTTLED UP
Don’t keep things bottled up
If life is getting you down
Pour yourself a large one
And drink away your frown
The Red Cross are getting greedy
Not happy to just milk me in life
They want me to will them a percentage
Of what should go to my wife
A MAN IN A HOT AIR BALLOON # 1
A Man in a hot air balloon
Has lost his bearings
As he slowly floated by
He looks down below
And shouts to a man
“Hello, Where am I”?
“Are you completely mad?”
The man shouted back
“You’re floating in the sky”
THE DEPENDABLE FIG ROLL
The dependable Fig Roll
Or Fig Newton if you must
As one of your five a day
It’s an absolute must
THE HEDGEHOG CULL
The campaigners have won
The Hedgehog cull won’t be done
They argued it shouldn’t go ahead
It was just wrong they said
Saying they were un putdown-able
I think they are just un pickup-able
THE LIFE OF PIE
Off they go to the bakers
For a pie of pork and pickle
Trundling along the road
Riding on their obesecycle
A BITTER PILL
Realisation of my folly comes
As I lay abed at first light
I took a sleeping pill and
A laxative on the same night
ON THEIR OBESECYCLE
On their obesecycle
They have to scurry
Not that the obese
Are able to hurry
They can still walk
Though they don’t bovver
And they are so fat
That they appear to hover
DON’T KEEP THINGS BOTTLED UP
Don’t keep things bottled up
If life is getting you down
Pour yourself a large one
And drink away your frown