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twist
12-03-2012, 08:51 AM
There is good and bad in every man
And like the two sides of a coin
'Tis upto him and him alone
Which side of the coin is uppermost

twist
12-03-2012, 07:40 PM
An attempt at lyrics

I'm just a lonely one in a lonely crowd
Just a lonely cloud in a lonely sky
Just a lonely guy in a lonely car
Just a lonely star in a night
Just a lonely light in a lonely street
Just two lonely feet in the lonely sand
Just a lonely hand on a trigger
Just a lonely figure under a lonely sea
Just a lonely me

Charles Darnay
12-03-2012, 07:47 PM
Not sure what you're doing with the first one. It's not much of a poem, and it says absolutely nothing.

hillwalker
12-04-2012, 05:35 AM
^^ Have to agree - not a poem and hardly enlightening.

As for the 'lyric' - again too derivative to mean much to anyone except the writer.
The 'lonely hand (?) on a trigger' might have led somewhere interesting but you fail to take us anywhere - overall like your first piece it's an exercise in saying nothing.

H