are we too gender focused?

[cacian]

Do societies strive by division of the senses and genders where everything is equally divided to create tension.
Ie blue for boys pink for girls hairdressers and barbers fashions and styles are all geared to separate the masculine from the feminine.
Separation by name is accusative and letting go of our gender image as the mean to exist is propably better long term.

The question is:

Sexual and idendity are linked.
Should gender interfer?

[RicMisc]

In short; yes I think we are too gender focused. There are too many things that are considered typically masculine or typically feminine. We are not only born either of the two (in general) but we are raised as either of the two as well. If you are a boy you will get in contact with boyish things form the moment you're born.

This makes me think that there is of course some difference genetically but a lot of differences are imposed by society. For example the color pink. For an insanely long time it was considered just straight up gay if you were to wear anything pink as a guy. I'm glad that's different now but it does show that these things are imposed by society and are not per se natural.

This wearing pink is just a simple example and I would have been able to survive without being able to wear something pink without being called gay. The problem however is larger because there are quite a lot of people who are not particularly fond of the things that their gender should like. This can cause certain insecurities and can cause someone to pretend to like something that he actually does not like. It can restrict people in being themselves.

I've had this problem for a very long time, I have always been quite a 'feminine' guy. I have never really been that into sports, although enjoyed doing some I didn't like watching it whatsoever. My music taste is very broad but a part of my music style could be described as feminine or gay. Now I'm not too bothered by what other people think about this but I know of some people who are and are therefore afraid to be themselves. I mean, can you imagine having to hide the fact that you like listening to that new song by your favourite artist just because it might not be masculine. How odd is that.

So yes; we are too gender focused. People should be able to like and do and wear what they like to without feeling restricted because they happen to be a guy or a girl.

[SkyCetacean]

There are inherent differences between men and women, but they are not nearly so great or imposing or all-encompassing as many would like to believe. Indeed, many of the different traits ascribed to the various genders are imposed on them by society, remnants of ages long spent and long dead, but whose remnants echo and sweep and bury themselves deep in the social zeitgeist. Things are getting better in that regard, but they are not fixed quite fully as of yet.

I think that as a society we need to come to a point where we can acknowledge our differences, and yet come to perceive people as having identities beyond their gender.

[cacian]

In short; yes I think we are too gender focused. There are too many things that are considered typically masculine or typically feminine. We are not only born either of the two (in general) but we are raised as either of the two as well. If you are a boy you will get in contact with boyish things form the moment you're born.
I think you are right. It the word 'typical' that makes easier to impose differences when really it is a biological difference the rest is aesthetic.
Like the saying 'like father like son and like mother like daughter' or as the french tel pere tel fils. I think it is myth to presume it is as simple as that.


This makes me think that there is of course some difference genetically but a lot of differences are imposed by society. For example the color pink. For an insanely long time it was considered just straight up gay if you were to wear anything pink as a guy. I'm glad that's different now but it does show that these things are imposed by society and are not per se natural.
Apparently pink use to be for boys and blue for girls. Now it is the reverse.
I am not sure how they decided on these two colours. It is could have been green and yellow for all we cared.


This wearing pink is just a simple example and I would have been able to survive without being able to wear something pink without being called gay. The problem however is larger because there are quite a lot of people who are not particularly fond of the things that their gender should like. This can cause certain insecurities and can cause someone to pretend to like something that he actually does not like. It can restrict people in being themselves.
Agreed. There is also the element of long/short hair and fashion dictating what to waer and how to wear it. I often quote fashion with faschism.


I've had this problem for a very long time, I have always been quite a 'feminine' guy. I have never really been that into sports, although enjoyed doing some I didn't like watching it whatsoever. My music taste is very broad but a part of my music style could be described as feminine or gay. Now I'm not too bothered by what other people think about this but I know of some people who are and are therefore afraid to be themselves. I mean, can you imagine having to hide the fact that you like listening to that new song by your favourite artist just because it might not be masculine. How odd is that.
It is indeed frustrating and truly sad that one has to justify to the world what they do and what they like without being taunted about.
Societies need to grow a pair. I guess religion and backwards cultures do not help.

So yes; we are too gender focused. People should be able to like and do and wear what they like to without feeling restricted because they happen to be a guy or a girl.
Do you think most of our sexual frustrations stem form such lack of expression of oneself?


There are inherent differences between men and women, but they are not nearly so great or imposing or all-encompassing as many would like to believe. Indeed, many of the different traits ascribed to the various genders are imposed on them by society, remnants of ages long spent and long dead, but whose remnants echo and sweep and bury themselves deep in the social zeitgeist. Things are getting better in that regard, but they are not fixed quite fully as of yet.

I think that as a society we need to come to a point where we can acknowledge our differences, and yet come to perceive people as having identities beyond their gender.

I think it is difficult for a whole society to ackowldge such important aspect of personalties beyond boy and girl tag because of Media influence on everything we do.
Fashion is much a contributor to such division.

[RicMisc]

An interesting video about gender, sexuality and sexual behaviour.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXAoG8vAyzI&feature=g-all-u

[cacian]

An interesting video about gender, sexuality and sexual behaviour.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXAoG8vAyzI&feature=g-all-u

Hey RicMisc thank you for the link.
There is a lot there haha.
Interesting bit about asexuality seen a sexual orientation I would propably say it is more one extreme of sex addiciton.

[Volya]

Hey RicMisc thank you for the link.
There is a lot there haha.
Interesting bit about asexuality seen a sexual orientation I would propably say it is more one extreme of sex addiciton.

More like the opposite of a sex addiction.

[cacian]

More like the opposite of a sex addiction.
From one extreme to the other is what I meant to say sorry I did not say correctly.
An opposite is not necessarily an extreme.
I might be wrong :p

[Alexander III]

For example the color pink. For an insanely long time it was considered just straight up gay if you were to wear anything pink as a guy. I'm glad that's different now but it does show that these things are imposed by society and are not per se natural.

This wearing pink is just a simple example and I would have been able to survive without being able to wear something pink without being called gay. The problem however is larger because there are quite a lot of people who are not particularly fond of the things that their gender should like. This can cause certain insecurities and can cause someone to pretend to like something that he actually does not like. It can restrict people in being themselves.


Actually - pink shirts have been a socially acceptable and common item of men's wardrobes since the 1920's.

[E.A Rumfield]

I think that your question is a very shallow one. As human beings we are always seeking ways to separate ourselves. Most of us seek identity in the masses. Our goals are herd goals, and that is our own fault. As human beings it is important to recognize ourselves as ourselves. Unique individuals who are very much like everyone else. We all reach the age of reason and when there it is up to us to decide to do with the knowledge. You only have to buy into what you would like to. Any meandering on the subject is pointless.

[Admin]

I have a hot pink tie I like to wear. It really pops with a dark suit.

[cacian]

Actually - pink shirts have been a socially acceptable and common item of men's wardrobes since the 1920's.
I personally think pink looks hot on men then women. Makeup also looks better on men. That is my personal opinion.


I have a hot pink tie I like to wear. It really pops with a dark suit.
Only a tie? I would get a whole variety of pink clothing to challenge the nation I would if I were a man haha.:p



I think that your question is a very shallow one. As human beings we are always seeking ways to separate ourselves. Most of us seek identity in the masses. Our goals are herd goals, and that is our own fault. As human beings it is important to recognize ourselves as ourselves. Unique individuals who are very much like everyone else. We all reach the age of reason and when there it is up to us to decide to do with the knowledge. You only have to buy into what you would like to. Any meandering on the subject is pointless.

Interesting and thank you for your post.
I am not sure what you mean by' separate ourselves'. Separate ourselves as in distinguish ourselves from the rest?
I agree that we all like to belong but I am not sure whether we all like to look and act the same.
I think some parts of societies like religions or moeurs try and alter by fixiating unatural ideas in our heads in order to exerce control because deep down these lattest know that people are going to challenge the norms or simly going to be different.
There is French quote by Moliere 'qui se sent morveux se mouche' means a minority who feels slightely touchy or concerned about their own insecurities are going to placate their insecurities on us by inventing conventions to try and pass the guilt. It is simply aguilt trip that these big institutions are about.
Sexuality has always been a concern to these institutions and so instead of letting go they would point the finger and make you feel bad about yourself.
It is only by ridding ourselves frome these stagnating backwards institutions that we gain our own free will and identities.

[E.A Rumfield]

They say New York City (my stomping grounds) is a melting pot. True, it is a collection of people from all over the world who don't want to be around each. Even till today, the blacks stick with the blacks, the Puerto Ricians with the Puerto Ricians, the Mexicans with the Mexicans, Russians with the Russians, the Italians with the Italians, the Jews with the Jews and on and on it goes. Further more the hip kids stick together, the Wall St crowd does to, the hardcore kids only hang with the hardcore kids. This is a bit unrelated but I was thinking just how much of our own thought is not our own. I don't watch the television but most people do. I was thinking about how there is a section of the country who likes Barack Obama because the Television shows and their favorite movie actors and celebrities and musical performers like Barack Obama and there is the other half of the country taught to like Romney. The people who matter already know who is going to win because who they want to win will win, the rest is just a half *** show for our benefit and the only reason for candidates is to keep us divided. Look around everything in our lives is made to separate us. Do you like the Giants or the Eagles. The Yankees or the Mets. Are you blue collar or white collar. If you every go into the city at a reasonable time you will see there are only two types of adults white collar or blue collar workers.

[RicMisc]

Actually - pink shirts have been a socially acceptable and common item of men's wardrobes since the 1920's.

It might have been socially acceptable in certain age groups, demographics and/or countries. I am talking about approximately ten years ago among tween/teen boys in Holland. I don't know how big your expertise is when it comes to this specific group but I was part of it, so my statement was based on personal experience.

[Volya]

I don't think pink looks great on men or women, but if they want to wear it thats their choice :p

[cacian]

I don't think pink looks great on men or women, but if they want to wear it thats their choice :p

It depends on which shade of pink we are talking about.
There is pink and then there is pink. There is more then fifty shades to pink haha.

[Alexander III]

It might have been socially acceptable in certain age groups, demographics and/or countries. I am talking about approximately ten years ago among tween/teen boys in Holland. I don't know how big your expertise is when it comes to this specific group but I was part of it, so my statement was based on personal experience.

When I was 15, reading and virginity were also huge social stigmas. I assumed you were talking about adult perceptions not those of children/teenagers - for lets be honest the later are really useless.