An Autumn Dawning

[E.A Rumfield]

Autumn is dawning
and I watch the first leaves fall
coloring the afternoon
with their random dance
the weakest ones pale first
and are picked up by the wind
highlighting it's invisible force
all the leaves are doomed
but some are still green
you gotta enjoy it
while
it lasts

[Scheherazade]

I have read this three times (twice out loud) and I cannot shake the feeling that it is prose divided into shorter lines.

Maybe getting away from strict, rule-bound grammar might help... I am not sure.

Last three lines, in my opinion, do not go with the rest either.

Also, "it's" should be "its".

[cacian]

I really like this very much.

[Varenne Rodin]

This is about autumn. It is autumnal, if I am not mistaken.