Sci-fi Love

[Delta40]

Is the coffee table
with the glass stains
and cigarette ash
enough to suck you back
through the vortex
of sixty seven Star Trek episodes?
I'll wear large hoop earrings
and call you captain
if you slick back the hair
missing with your scalp.
What's that epic journey we went on again?
It doesn't matter now
since after breaking parts of me
with erotic alien concepts
I crawled a lifetime
through miles of conflictual emptiness
till I found my feet
in a plastic bag
tied to a olive branch.
Now I wonder
how many past lives
do we live knowing more
about our existence yesterday
than we do today?

[E.A Rumfield]

Very good.

[Hawkman]

Two things, Delta. "...slick back the hair missing with your scalp" Is the guy a victim of a Native American?

And:

"through miles of conflictual emptiness" is an awful line, I guess you could be using it ironically, but it spoils the poem. I'd just cut it.

Everthing else - Great!

Live and be well - H

[Delta40]

Two things, Delta. "...slick back the hair missing with your scalp" Is the guy a victim of a Native American?

And:

"through miles of conflictual emptiness" is an awful line, I guess you could be using it ironically, but it spoils the poem. I'd just cut it.

Everthing else - Great!

Live and be well - H

He has indeed been scalped. It's hanging in my wardrobe :p

I will mull over the awful line with an awful cup of coffee.

Thanks very kindly Hawk

[Jerrybaldy]

"Delta dated a Trekkie, Delta dated a Trekkie" :D

I am grappling still with the meaning of the last 5 lines, its a riddle in a vortex. Beam me up.

[Delta40]

"Delta dated a Trekkie, Delta dated a Trekkie" :D .

What gave me away?

[Jeos]

'It doesn't matter now
since after breaking parts of me
with erotic alien concepts'

This is true.
Loveless eroticism eventually breaks us.

Interesting poetic prose.

[Jerrybaldy]

This is true.
Loveless eroticism eventually breaks us.


Or... maybe it's not true.

[Jeos]

you are right Jerry... but only now and then. Too often it leads to derision...

[Bar22do]

Hey Delta, this is great except for that line Hawk mentioned. Touching. Plus it seems to me you looked into my notebook where I scribbled of emptiness and of feet. You'll see it posted one of these days when I have time to have a look at it. Your writing always surprise even though it is always so much YOU. Actually this IS you.
Yes, and maybe it isn't true, I mean about the loveless eroticism.

[Delta40]

Thanks Bar. You see why I have to keep the notion of emptiness in but I get the line is pretty bad. Am still drinking awful coffee...

[Jerrybaldy]

What gave me away?
You gave me no clue, it must have just been my incredible intuition :ciappa:

[Delta40]

You gave me no clue, it must have just been my incredible intuition :ciappa:

Can't fool a Brit :thumbsup: