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DieterM
07-24-2012, 03:01 AM
… with boom boom boom,
progressive instants hammer out
of little plastic balls
in ears smelling of citrus,
synthetic cadences beating the day,
percussing streets and houses
while my feet move on and on,
the morning freshness bearing
promises of smould’ring hours to come,
and cars, unheard, slow down, accelerate,
and on I walk and on and on,
reality framed into one hundred
and twenty seven fragments every minute,
while sentences and pictures
swirl around the think tank,
bumping into one another,
Spain is burning, how to barbecue a pizza,
and those 8,000 from Peugeot
soon to be unemployed,
and have I put my keys into the bag?,
and boom boom boom, I march,
light, shadow, light,
a city portion flickers by
in boom boom boom three steps,
I cross two handsome men,
unsmiling, yet their pectorals
under taut shirts put me
in a state of pure euphoria,
a couple, hand in hand, walks by,
leaving a wafting trail of
CK eternities playing with Givenchy,
and boom boom boom,
the road is long but
distance insubstantial
while the music blares…

Twota
07-24-2012, 12:52 PM
boom boom boom, I like the poem. :D

DocHeart
07-24-2012, 02:23 PM
A great exercise in pace! I'd like to hear you read this out loud and see if it would be like I imagine it --rhythmical but breathless, poignant but fast.

Really, really great.

DH

Bar22do
07-24-2012, 04:57 PM
this one, Dieter, is simply perfect, powerful, amazing - it goes straight to the Favorites!

DieterM
07-25-2012, 04:26 AM
Thanks Twota, Doc and Bar for commenting, and I'm really glad you liked it! Wasn't so sure about how it would be perceived by others as with the current heat, all my sensors are rather diminished…

DocHeart
07-25-2012, 08:41 AM
An afterthought: the title might be better if you use "at" instead of "in".

DieterM
07-25-2012, 10:28 AM
Got me there, DocHeart! But argghhhh, I cannot for the love of it change the title on this forum! So let's just pretend, you and me and any new reader, please, that I did change, ok? Thanks a lot, chaps! PS: I guess you know what the word "heat" means, too, if you're still in Athens. Never 've been as hot as the day I was looking for a particular adress somewhere near Syntagma in mid-August, noonish...

DocHeart
07-25-2012, 02:08 PM
Got me there, DocHeart! But argghhhh, I cannot for the love of it change the title on this forum! So let's just pretend, you and me and any new reader, please, that I did change, ok? Thanks a lot, chaps! PS: I guess you know what the word "heat" means, too, if you're still in Athens. Never 've been as hot as the day I was looking for a particular adress somewhere near Syntagma in mid-August, noonish...

Oh I know all about heat, my friend.

the morning freshness bearing
promises of smould’ring hours to come,

These (brilliant) two lines was where I started to really relate...

By the way, what are you doing around Syntagma mid-August? Even the muggers are on an island by then. Next time, just hop on a ferry :)

Best,
DH

miyako73
07-25-2012, 03:14 PM
Impressive! One of my favorite poems in this forum. I listened as I read. It felt as if I danced as I thought about Spain and smelled the non-existent perfume.