Are you wearing? # 4

[Biggus]

ARE YOU WEARING MOURNING CLOTHES?

Are you wearing mourning clothes?
Black really does look good on you
And I am very curious to know
If your underwear is black too

ARE YOU WEARING SOMETHING OLD?

Are you wearing something old?
A family heirloom lovingly handed down
Something of great personal sentiment
Pinned to your beautiful wedding gown

ARE YOU WEARING SCENT?

Are you wearing scent?
You don’t usually exude
Even when you’re going out
For a social interlude
If you are wearing scent
It means you’re going to get rude

ARE YOU WEARING SLIPPERS?

Are you wearing slippers?
Yes I do think they suit you
I just questioning their suitability
For a visit to the zoo

ARE YOU WEARING A BAGGY SWEATER?

Are you wearing a baggy sweater?
For a particular reason maybe
You haven’t suddenly become a frump
So you must be having a baby

ARE YOU WEARING BEIGE?

Are you wearing beige?
For one reason or another
But please don’t be telling me
That it’s your favourite colour

ARE YOU WEARING MUSK?

Are you wearing musk?
Well someone is me thinks
And I know that it’s not me
But God it really stinks

ARE YOU WEARING FALSIES?

Are you wearing falsies?
How disappointing is that
I thought you were well proportioned
But your chest is really flat
I thought you were a catch
But I was wrong about that
I thought I was getting mackerel
But I ended up with sprat

ARE YOU WEARING FISHNET TIGHTS?

Are you wearing fishnet tights?
That’s not a bad catch, I’ll bet
There’s a sight worth seeing
When you bend over Jeanette
That must be like the moment
The football hits the back of the net

ARE YOU WEARING A SCOWL?

Are you wearing a scowl?
Or is it your irritable bowel
No it’s an irritable scowl
Because I left my wet towel

[Jack of Hearts]

There's no way to explain it, but this is simultaneously the worst and the best.




Goallllllllll!







J

[Biggus]

I can live with that.
Thank you