Walking

[Revolte]

This day,
better spent asleep
was rather spent walking
through the vastness of empty space
(accompanied only by memories
of trotting horses and hunted rodents)
while moods swung on tire-swings
–like children playing in Silent Hill
waiting for the sirens to alarm them
of hellish ghouls and guilty mothers
so they may flee to the scene of the crime
and find solace in it's rusted church walls.

[Revolte]

why do I have 74 views and not even a "you suck homes!!!!"

granted I'm both drunk and very manic/depressed right now but really. people shoudl say something from time to time. you know?

even a hateful comment is a recognition. same with the others. wy do some have 30 comments and a a thousand views, how, why, why?

[jajdude]

Dunno. First time I saw it. Some get a lot of replies for several reasons I guess. A well-liked writer or a well-liked piece of writing, of course, and the OP replying to everybody adds a bunch.

Then again, look at the number of replies to all the poems and short stories on these first pages. A good few zeros, which is a bit disheartening for the writer I suppose.

[PrinceMyshkin]

"may" in the penultimate line should be might and "it's" in the final line should be without the apostrophe. Otherwise it's a fine and vivid perception/apparition.

[the facade]

i agree - many posts here are never acknowledged. very disheartening for writers looking for constructive criticism.

anyway,
"through the vastness of empty space" - is as empty a statement (poetically speaking) as its content.
"(accompanied only by memories
of trotting horses and hunted rodents)" - appears self-indulgent here.
but from here on ("while moods...") the poem picks up and to my surprise i felt that you did a marvelous job discussing emotions and moods as a whole(something i normally feel needs be illustrated in particularity).
so, i concluded the poem with enjoyment.

looking forward to reading more!

[Revolte]

well I'm glad no one is punching me in the face for my out of mind demand for attention.