A Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ist Manifesto

[WolfLarsen]

A Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ist Manifesto
by Wolf Larsen

1) Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Zippity-Boppity-Hoppity-Sing!

2) Tomorrow is the zip-zap-zing that we should all bop about!!

3) The time has come to hoppity-hop and Bopity-bop and Doo-doo everywhere!

4) Doo-doo is the spiritual and spherical equivalent of Schmipadee-do--dism! Long live Schmipadee-do--dism! Long live Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism! Long live individualism! Let every living human being on this planet become his or her own great unique ism! Live your life like a great unique ism that belongs to you and no one else because you're ism is yours, and no one else's! Individualism now! Individualism forever! Creativity now! Creativity forever!

5) Dong-ding-who!op is exactly the yippeeeeee we’re talking about! We're talking about the "sum of the hysteria of all the chaos in the universe, or something." These are the great poetic words of the de-facto founder of this great artistic/literary movement Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!

[Bewlay Brother]

"because you're ism is yours, and no one else's! Individualism now!"

It is your ism, not you're ism.

No other way to respond, except that it is too bad the greedy vicious capitalistic piggish conservative bigoted literary high-upper scoundrels reject things like this because they are so prudish they can't see how brilliant and paradigm-shattering this is and how it opens doors that will never be closed again.

[hillwalker]

I'd be interested to discover what your intention was in writing and posting this on here.

Presumably you're after feedback - but would you prefer us to tell you to stick to what you do best and ignore any constructive criticism or helpful suggestions - leave it exactly as it is and not be 'derailed'? Or are we invited to have our opinion concerning it - and air it on here?

I'm curious, seriously... as I imagine most of us are. What's this all about?

H

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

All I know is that Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop is an actual name of a man who was recently arrested (I forget for what), which this is obviously a reference to. What the hell Wolf is actually talking about, I don't know,

And I've mentioned this before, Wolf, and I'll mention it again--the extreme overuse of exclamation points is overwhelmingly distracting. It made this nearly unreadable (though much wasn't needed to cross that bridge).

[WolfLarsen]

Welcome to Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism! This is a new literary movement! You can see the latest Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ist poem in the poetry section. It is entitled ?21st Century oPetry – Yoetrp – Tyroep AnEbodi?

[hillwalker]

Thanks for clearing the matter up so succinctly. I'll leave you to "play" at being a writer.

H

[cafolini]

You must now bomb Hill with a cream puff to seal the issue and unfinish the jobodoodoo.

[Darcy88]

Live your life like a great unique ism that belongs to you and no one else because you're ism is yours, and no one else's! Individualism now! Individualism forever! Creativity now! Creativity forever!

We're talking about the "sum of the hysteria of all the chaos in the universe, or something."

The guy who named himself Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop bears a striking resemblance to Charles Manson. He was also caught carrying around a loaded handgun.

Your call for absolute individuality, for hysteria and chaos, for total maximum uniqueness, only goes to show how unfamiliar you are with all those things. Look at Rimbaud, look at Nietzsche. Complete freedom leads to neurasthenia, to breakdown, such meteoric rise always ends in calamitous descent. A fish can leap, leap high into the air toward the sun, but it must return to the water. Chaos for any duration beyond a brief flash spirals into madness. You're either mad or fettered, your sentiments being a sign of your struggle against those fetters.

People who have experience with the kind of freedom you long for often acquire a healthy respect for boundary and measure. Learned you nothing from the tale of Icarus? Or from that of Phaeton? There are lessons to be garnered there. As I said before, the dionysian is complimented by the apollonian and there is a marked difference between freedom and chaos. Entirely denouncing all conservation and form is a sign of immaturity, proof that you fail to grasp the essentially cyclical nature of art and life. You would have the wild flowers bloom year round, you'd hold bacchanalia each and every day, through all four seasons rather than solely the spring.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, a time to reap that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I think your words are wasted on him, Darcy.

[Jack of Hearts]

What's important to you isn't any revolution in itself. It's that you be the one to start it.

Spotlight revolutionary.









J

[Darcy88]

I think your words are wasted on him, Darcy.

I know. But debate is often futile. Doesn't make it any less fun.

[BookBeauty]

Juvenile nonsense.

Words were not artfully chosen in this piece. There is much to say for the painstaking art of classic writing, where every word has its place. Every word that was chosen was done so because it furthered a message, theme or idea.

In this piece, I see words written to get attention, but no true art in any way, shape or form.

It reminds me, however, of a story in modern art.

There was a man who was so frustrated with his wife's lack of success with her realistic art pieces that he made a creation that took him a few seconds and attempted to sell it. It was basically a few paper plates with child-like doodles of a smiley face on them.

Art sellers loved it, the public adored it, and it reached critical acclaim. He became quite famous before confessing his true intention for the piece.

I'm afraid the names are lost on me, but the point is: There is a lot of work circulating out there that is worth our time to read, and view, and then there is work that takes very little thought and energy that has no true value in it.

Just my two cents.

[MarkBastable]

Juvenile nonsense.


Maybe it is. But I don't think it's much more juvenile or nonsensical than an awful lot of creative writing submitted here that doesn't attract such open criticism. I'm not sure why Wolf's effort has been singled out for this concerted opprobrium. I think that it might be because this piece irritates and exasperates people. However, if exasperated irritation is justification for such strongly-worded reaction to members' submissions, I might start contributing a few more critiques around here.

On the generous deployment of exclamation marks, by the way, I agree with Mutatis. When I get to be emperor, slaphappy exclamation marks will be punishable by the public severance of fingers.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

WolfLarsen is the only creative writer on LitNet I read regularly, and that's solely because of the hilarious comments/discussions his writing spawns. To be honest, if I'm going to read, I'm not wasting my time on unpublished, anonymous writers. Don't get me wrong, there are some good poets here (I don't bother reading short stories--I learned my lesson not to after slogging my way through a few), but most seem like your run-of-the-mill angsty teen.

[stlukesguild]

Maybe it is. But I don't think it's much more juvenile or nonsensical than an awful lot of creative writing submitted here that doesn't attract such open criticism. I'm not sure why Wolf's effort has been singled out for this concerted opprobrium.

I think the obvious answer is that Wolf's efforts have been accompanied by the greatest of pretensions in the form of his manifestos calling for some great literary revolution. If you go about dismissing the majority of the "classics" (or works included in the Norton Anthology) then you better be able to back it up with some alternative of real merit. Mozart, Michelangelo, and Beethoven were all openly egotistic (as were endless other artists... a strong ego being almost a prerequisite for the arts)... but they all backed up their claims. There are certainly any number of juvenile attempts at writing poetry or prose posted here every day... but seldom from individuals calling for a iconoclastic revolution and setting themselves up as some literary visionary or Messiah.

[cafolini]

The way I see it, Wolf is not so much interested in what he proposes as he is in stirring the pot to let the vapors rise, the ingenuity spring in diverse ways with room for many more subjects than the typical inflexibly interpreted stuff based on normality and the preservation of canons that serve little purpose in many unrevealed realms.

[MarkBastable]

Maybe it is. But I don't think it's much more juvenile or nonsensical than an awful lot of creative writing submitted here that doesn't attract such open criticism. I'm not sure why Wolf's effort has been singled out for this concerted opprobrium.

I think the obvious answer is that Wolf's efforts have been accompanied by the greatest of pretensions in the form of his manifestos calling for some great literary revolution. If you go about dismissing the majority of the "classics" (or works included in the Norton Anthology) then you better be able to back it up with some alternative of real merit. Mozart, Michelangelo, and Beethoven were all openly egotistic (as were endless other artists... a strong ego being almost a prerequisite for the arts)... but they all backed up their claims. There are certainly any number of juvenile attempts at writing poetry or prose posted here every day... but seldom from individuals calling for a iconoclastic revolution and setting themselves up as some literary visionary or Messiah.

Yeah, that's a fair point. I was assessing the thing in isolation, never having read any of his other pronouncements.

[Bewlay Brother]

Maybe it is. But I don't think it's much more juvenile or nonsensical than an awful lot of creative writing submitted here that doesn't attract such open criticism. I'm not sure why Wolf's effort has been singled out for this concerted opprobrium. I think that it might be because this piece irritates and exasperates people. However, if exasperated irritation is justification for such strongly-worded reaction to members' submissions, I might start contributing a few more critiques around here.

On the generous deployment of exclamation marks, by the way, I agree with Mutatis. When I get to be emperor, slaphappy exclamation marks will be punishable by the public severance of fingers.

Can you give some examples? I have no idea what you are talking about.

(Besides the "Babies" short story)

[WolfLarsen]

I never said I was the Messiah of the literary world. There are literary conservatives who put things in my mouth that I never said. I just say that the literary world is an uptight puritanical dinosaur. I love literature, but the literary world is basically a putrid swamp infested with people of closed minds. But not everybody in the literary world is like that.

There are all kinds of people on this literary board. There are those who like to write dry, archaic, lifeless 19th-century style poems. But other people like myself prefer innovation. I'm not interested in writing 19th-century style poetry in the 21st century. This makes some people mad, because I'm not like them.

Back before the Internet I used to read my stuff at poetry readings. People had two reactions. They either loved my poetry or they hated it. For every person that loved my poetry there were usually two or three others that hated it.

Did you know that I Wolf Larsen got the lowest scores in the history of the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams? Unless somebody beat my record (I doubt it) I still hold the distinction of having the lowest scores in the history of both the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams. I think that is quite an accomplishment! After all, the Green Mill Tavern is supposedly where the poetry slam was born.

At the Green Mill Tavern my poetry practically caused a riot, as Chicago in the conservative Midwest is far less tolerant of innovation than New York City, so the people in New York didn't actually nearly riot. So anyway, I nearly followed in the footsteps of the composers Igor Stravinsky and Gustav Mahler, as their symphonies caused riots when conservative concertgoers went on a rampage.

To this day one of my favorite pieces of music is Igor Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. I feel it is a wonderful piece of music! But of course, it certainly was not written in "good taste", and it angered the ignorant connoisseurs of "good taste".

[Darcy88]

I never said I was the Messiah of the literary world. There are literary conservatives who put things in my mouth that I never said. I just say that the literary world is an uptight puritanical dinosaur. I love literature, but the literary world is basically a putrid swamp infested with people of closed minds. But not everybody in the literary world is like that.

There are all kinds of people on this literary board. There are those who like to write dry, archaic, lifeless 19th-century style poems. But other people like myself prefer innovation. I'm not interested in writing 19th-century style poetry in the 21st century. This makes some people mad, because I'm not like them.

Back before the Internet I used to read my stuff at poetry readings. People had two reactions. They either loved my poetry or they hated it. For every person that loved my poetry there were usually two or three others that hated it.

Did you know that I Wolf Larsen got the lowest scores in the history of the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams? Unless somebody beat my record (I doubt it) I still hold the distinction of having the lowest scores in the history of both the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams. I think that is quite an accomplishment! After all, the Green Mill Tavern is supposedly where the poetry slam was born.

At the Green Mill Tavern my poetry practically caused a riot, as Chicago in the conservative Midwest is far less tolerant of innovation than New York City, so the people in New York didn't actually nearly riot. So anyway, I nearly followed in the footsteps of the composers Igor Stravinsky and Gustav Mahler, as their symphonies caused riots when conservative concertgoers went on a rampage.

To this day one of my favorite pieces of music is Igor Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. I feel it is a wonderful piece of music! But of course, it certainly was not written in "good taste", and it angered the ignorant connoisseurs of "good taste".

I have never laughed as hard as I am laughing at this response. Comparing yourself to Stravinsky? Yes Wolf. The audience reaction showed their resistance to innovation, not their dislike for poetry of poor quality. You actually maintain as a badge of honour, as an achievement, the fact that your poems received the lowest scores. This response is the finest thing you've ever written. In terms of comedy it outclasses anything by Mark Twain.

[cafolini]

I never said I was the Messiah of the literary world. There are literary conservatives who put things in my mouth that I never said. I just say that the literary world is an uptight puritanical dinosaur. I love literature, but the literary world is basically a putrid swamp infested with people of closed minds. But not everybody in the literary world is like that.

There are all kinds of people on this literary board. There are those who like to write dry, archaic, lifeless 19th-century style poems. But other people like myself prefer innovation. I'm not interested in writing 19th-century style poetry in the 21st century. This makes some people mad, because I'm not like them.

Back before the Internet I used to read my stuff at poetry readings. People had two reactions. They either loved my poetry or they hated it. For every person that loved my poetry there were usually two or three others that hated it.

Did you know that I Wolf Larsen got the lowest scores in the history of the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams? Unless somebody beat my record (I doubt it) I still hold the distinction of having the lowest scores in the history of both the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams. I think that is quite an accomplishment! After all, the Green Mill Tavern is supposedly where the poetry slam was born.

At the Green Mill Tavern my poetry practically caused a riot, as Chicago in the conservative Midwest is far less tolerant of innovation than New York City, so the people in New York didn't actually nearly riot. So anyway, I nearly followed in the footsteps of the composers Igor Stravinsky and Gustav Mahler, as their symphonies caused riots when conservative concertgoers went on a rampage.

To this day one of my favorite pieces of music is Igor Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. I feel it is a wonderful piece of music! But of course, it certainly was not written in "good taste", and it angered the ignorant connoisseurs of "good taste".

But Wolf, stop disappointing me. I rather have you as one of the great messiahs than 99% of the ones mental myopia recognizes. Keep shaking the apple tree. When this is over you should go to update the wing of Antonin Artaud.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

Well, there's nothing wrong with Wolf's ego. Seriously, dude, get over yourself.

[Bewlay Brother]

I never said I was the Messiah of the literary world. There are literary conservatives who put things in my mouth that I never said. I just say that the literary world is an uptight puritanical dinosaur. I love literature, but the literary world is basically a putrid swamp infested with people of closed minds. But not everybody in the literary world is like that.

There are all kinds of people on this literary board. There are those who like to write dry, archaic, lifeless 19th-century style poems. But other people like myself prefer innovation. I'm not interested in writing 19th-century style poetry in the 21st century. This makes some people mad, because I'm not like them.

Back before the Internet I used to read my stuff at poetry readings. People had two reactions. They either loved my poetry or they hated it. For every person that loved my poetry there were usually two or three others that hated it.

Did you know that I Wolf Larsen got the lowest scores in the history of the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams? Unless somebody beat my record (I doubt it) I still hold the distinction of having the lowest scores in the history of both the Nuyorican and Green Mill Tavern poetry slams. I think that is quite an accomplishment! After all, the Green Mill Tavern is supposedly where the poetry slam was born.

At the Green Mill Tavern my poetry practically caused a riot, as Chicago in the conservative Midwest is far less tolerant of innovation than New York City, so the people in New York didn't actually nearly riot. So anyway, I nearly followed in the footsteps of the composers Igor Stravinsky and Gustav Mahler, as their symphonies caused riots when conservative concertgoers went on a rampage.

To this day one of my favorite pieces of music is Igor Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. I feel it is a wonderful piece of music! But of course, it certainly was not written in "good taste", and it angered the ignorant connoisseurs of "good taste".

We don't have anything wrong with innovation. Your work has no substance to it. It means nothing. (except for that interview you did with yourself. That seemed like it was a 5th level satire or something)

For example,

I absolutely LOVE David Bowie. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AVhfInAEQI


But hate Lady Gaga...

http://www.psdmate.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/lady-gaga-celeb.jpg

[Bewlay Brother]

Well, there's nothing wrong with Wolf's ego. Seriously, dude, get over yourself.

I know! How does this sort of thing even happen? I used to think I was a bit too arrogant about my writing, but I don't have 1/4th the ego he has but write 557 times better.

This further convinces me that doing things for shock value is the single biggest farce art has ever been a victim of.

Wolf is to liberals what Sarah Palin is to conservatives. (times TEN!)

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I don't really see how the political analogy is relevant.

[Charles Darnay]

All I can gather from this thread and the other one in this line is that

1. I really want to be a "literary messiah."
2. I think to accomplish that I need to drink a bottle of scotch, throw paint all around my room, blast Stravinsky in the background, scream random words the paint, and film the whole thing.
3. This will lead to the salvation of all. The literate will ascend and those who hate reading will be left below.

Alright, I have a plan.

[Bewlay Brother]

I don't really see how the political analogy is relevant.

Sarah Palin is a bit embarrassing for Conservatives because she is such a caricature. The same goes for Wolf, but with liberals.

[MarkBastable]

Sarah Palin is a bit embarrassing for Conservatives because she is such a caricature. The same goes for Wolf, but with liberals.

Nope, sorry. The analogy still doesn't make sense.

[Bewlay Brother]

Nope, sorry. The analogy still doesn't make sense.

Okie dokie. I guess a bit of a stretch, but he doesn't do liberals any justice.

[MarkBastable]

Okie dokie. I guess a bit of a stretch, but he doesn't do liberals any justice.

Actually, I'm not even sure in what sense he's 'liberal'.

[hillwalker]

The audience hated 'The Rites of Spring' when it was first performed because it sounded unlike anything they had heard before in the setting of classical orchestral music performance - the same analogy could be applied to Dylan when he first 'went electric'. The audience response was hostile in the extreme.

But no one denied that Stravinski and Dylan had/have talent - it's just that the audience expected them to display these talents in a more listener-friendly manner and were ill-prepared for such revolutionary behaviour.

The difference is that Wolf doesn't have the innate talent to be able to take such risks - he is setting out to alienate his audience (whom he sees as puritanical snobs hung-up on 19th-century poetry???) and that's pretty much his manifesto as an artist. It's all about being a misunderstood maverick who counts being loathed by the mainstream as his validation rather than making an artistic statement that has some aesthetic legitimacy.

H

[MarkBastable]

The audience hated 'The Rites of Spring' when it was first performed because it sounded unlike anything they had heard before in the setting of classical orchestral music performance - the same analogy could be applied to Dylan when he first 'went electric'. The audience response was hostile in the extreme.

But no one denied that Stravinski and Dylan had/have talent - it's just that the audience expected them to display these talents in a more listener-friendly manner and were ill-prepared for such revolutionary behaviour.

The difference is that Wolf doesn't have the innate talent to be able to take such risks - he is setting out to alienate his audience (whom he sees as puritanical snobs hung-up on 19th-century poetry???) and that's pretty much his manifesto as an artist. It's all about being a misunderstood maverick who counts being loathed by the mainstream as his validation rather than making an artistic statement that has some aesthetic legitimacy.

H

Though, of course, in order to alienate your audience, you first have to win an audience you can subsequently alienate.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

Sarah Palin is a bit embarrassing for Conservatives because she is such a caricature. The same goes for Wolf, but with liberals.
I understood the analogy (though it doesn't work, because Wolf would have to have as much influence and power over the liberal community as Palin does the conseevative); what I don't understand is why a political analogy has any relevance within the context of this thread. I also don't understand your obsession with constantly bringing up the conservative-versus-liberal debate when it has nothing at all to do with the current discussion.

[AuntShecky]

I don't know if Wolf is a literary revolutionary or not or if he has talent or what? I do think he's got a je nais sais quoi that draws LitNutters to his posts like a maggot, er, magnet. Oh, I Kid, I kid.

Seriously, though, Wolf, if we were granted a peek at your bedstand or lamp table, what kinds of works would we see there? I for one am extremely interested in which writers you read regularly and which ones you admire.

Please be specific. Maybe if we read the things you do we'd inch closer to your revolutionary point of view.

I'm not being sarcastic, just curious!

[Bewlay Brother]

I understood the analogy (though it doesn't work, because Wolf would have to have as much influence and power over the liberal community as Palin does the conseevative); what I don't understand is why a political analogy has any relevance within the context of this thread. I also don't understand your obsession with constantly bringing up the conservative-versus-liberal debate when it has nothing at all to do with the current discussion.

Well every single post of Wolf he goes on some rant calling all conservatives prudish and unartistic and pigheaded and bigoted. I didn't realize I was fixating on that. I can tone it down.

[MarkBastable]

Well, yeah. But, in the sense that he uses 'conservative' the opposite is not 'liberal'.

On top of which, just because he rails against conservatives, doesn't mean that he isn't one. It's arguable he is one, actually - inasmuchas he's making the standard complaints about the apparent status quo that everyone makes when they're young. He's bang on the stereotype - and you can't get much more conservative than that.

[YesNo]

I don't know if Wolf is a literary revolutionary or not or if he has talent or what? I do think he's got a je nais sais quoi that draws LitNutters to his posts like a maggot, er, magnet. Oh, I Kid, I kid.

Seriously, though, Wolf, if we were granted a peek at your bedstand or lamp table, what kinds of works would we see there? I for one am extremely interested in which writers you read regularly and which ones you admire.

Please be specific. Maybe if we read the things you do we'd inch closer to your revolutionary point of view.

I'm not being sarcastic, just curious!
I agree, AuntShecky. I'm curious also.

In addition to the books, I would also like to know what music and movies you like, Wolf. I am amazed at the way you are able to attract attention and get people--including myself--to post a comment.

[WolfLarsen]

An explanation for everything.

To answer your questions about Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism and its philosophies I have the following to say:

Zuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrroooooppp! Pliiiiiiinnnng! AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes!
Ffffrrrrroooooooonnnnnng!
Gajink! Foooork! Hicup! Wooooooonnnnnggg!
UuuuurrrrRRRRrrrrroooOOOOOooowwwwww!

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

Well, thanks for clearing things up.

[Darcy88]

An explanation for everything.

To answer your questions about Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism and its philosophies I have the following to say:

Zuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrroooooppp! Pliiiiiiinnnng! AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes!
Ffffrrrrroooooooonnnnnng!
Gajink! Foooork! Hicup! Wooooooonnnnnggg!
UuuuurrrrRRRRrrrrroooOOOOOooowwwwww!

A couple posters responded in a friendly manner and posed to you a staightforward question. This is how you respond? Gibberish? Madness is your ideal? Your goal is the elimination of all standard, even that of meaning, of sense. Anything goes. Anarchy in its worst pejorative sense.

[Bewlay Brother]

An explanation for everything.

To answer your questions about Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism and its philosophies I have the following to say:

Zuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrroooooppp! Pliiiiiiinnnng! AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes!
Ffffrrrrroooooooonnnnnng!
Gajink! Foooork! Hicup! Wooooooonnnnnggg!
UuuuurrrrRRRRrrrrroooOOOOOooowwwwww!

This is just tedious now.

[MarkBastable]

An explanation for everything.

To answer your questions about Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism and its philosophies I have the following to say:

Zuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrroooooppp! Pliiiiiiinnnng! AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes!
Ffffrrrrroooooooonnnnnng!
Gajink! Foooork! Hicup! Wooooooonnnnnggg!
UuuuurrrrRRRRrrrrroooOOOOOooowwwwww!

I think the giveaway here is that if you really believed that that explained it, you wouldn't have felt it necessary to tell us that that explained it. You'd have the confidence simply to start typing at 'Zuuuuu...' without the preamble about what it was intended to accomplish.

[Lokasenna]

We are now no longer the Knights who say 'Ni'. We are now the Knights who say... 'Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm.'

[WolfLarsen]

Lokasenna said:

We are now no longer the Knights who say 'Ni'. We are now the Knights who say... 'Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm.'


Wolf responds: Yes! Yes! Zoom-Boing! Zoom-Boing! Membrane gone hiiiiiiirrooooooowwwwww! Zwop!

PTANG is the fluorescence of Boom-Bang-Wow!

Fnnnaaaafiiily?

[YesNo]

I've always wanted to critique a poem that I didn't understand or was not even able to decipher by writing gibberish in return.

One problem with doing that, however, is the poet I would be critiquing would not realize it was a critique unless I introduced the nonsense with a readable explanation. Another problem with doing that is other readers would think there was something wrong with me which might be the case for all I know.



so i


we23

yy flying in the air air air air--long line--air air air air air
air hi yes it

wel9923
my password
no it aint ha you we something
****
else :) and so ;)

[Darcy88]

Another problem with doing that is other readers would think there was something wrong with me which might be the case for all I know.




You've demonstrated your soundness of mind on many ocassions. Wolf on the other hand....

I know what Wolf is up to. Its good for everyone to go through such a phase of freedom, iconoclasm, invention. But its just that, a phase. Linger there to long and temporary derangement becomes prolonged disease.

[WolfLarsen]

YesNo said:

so i
we23
yy
flying in the air air air air--long line--air air air air air
air hi yes it
wel9923
my password
no it aint
ha you we something


Wolf responds:

or do we something?
Let’s donk the something with yeeeyyyyyeee?
But it ain't something if we're not flying in the air, since the very air is made out of Zippity-wippity-dong!
Zwwwwwoooooooooooooop?

[AuntShecky]

Well, thanks for clearing things up.

You're the funniest person on the entire LitNet! I'd give my left whatchamacallit for your sense of humor.

[hillwalker]

At last something Wolf writes makes sense -
check out his last post for his reason why he edited his post.

As for the main post - it's got way beyond tiresome.

Time to put the spoilt brat to bed
and let us grown-ups get back to enjoying some poetry.

H

[Catamite]

I don't think he's a moron or even that erractic, I think just has a Lady Gaga esque 'Look at me!' syndrome, and so posts a lot of **** for attention. Maybe if everyone just ignores him...

[Darcy88]

YesNo said:


Wolf responds:

or do we something?
Let’s donk the something with yeeeyyyyyeee?
But it ain't something if we're not flying in the air, since the very air is made out of Zippity-wippity-dong!
Zwwwwwoooooooooooooop?

A typical revolutionary. Negation become a fire, devouring all, spreading beyond all bound.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

You're the funniest person on the entire LitNet! I'd give my left whatchamacallit for your sense of humor.

On the off chance you're being serious, thanks. :)

[JuniperWoolf]

WolfLarsen is the only creative writer on LitNet I read regularly, and that's solely because of the hilarious comments/discussions his writing spawns. To be honest, if I'm going to read, I'm not wasting my time on unpublished, anonymous writers. Don't get me wrong, there are some good poets here (I don't bother reading short stories--I learned my lesson not to after slogging my way through a few), but most seem like your run-of-the-mill angsty teen.

I usually just stick with MarkBastable and Lokasenna, they're safe bets.

Anyway, why do you guys care about Wolf at all? I've met dozens of kids like him. They wear ironic berets, make videos of meat rotting and call it "groundbreaking" then complain about how no one understands their art (oh, but they will - all of the greatest artists skyrocketed after their death, don't you know? One day, everyone will know the name Sally "douchebag-hipster" McGillicutty!). It annoys me but then I move on.

[WolfLarsen]

Wolf Larsen gives a speech at the Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ist Convention:

"Boing - boing - boing! The time has come to run and marauder and sing the Freudian marijuana bongs of Transylvania while we dance the Pa-Ting Ba-Ying Boo-Raw because Ramen noodles! The ancient rituals of Pa-Ting Ba-Ying Boo-Raw will soon be born from Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism! Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism is exactly the reason that we are all here today! We are all Zumba-Kadooba-Ratuba! We are all Jumikee-Keerockity-Zurickety! We are all Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop! And that's why I want to shower you all with the flood of my great excitement for this new movement called Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism!

Soon everyone in the world will fall to their knees in front of this great wonderful phenomenon called Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism! We are all the greatest most sweetest blasphemy that Doo-Doo has ever known! Doo-Doo is the very avalanche of pink prophylactics I'm talking about! Doo-Doo is about conquering city parks at night with our ytrFif-gbnkLif-sdptZxc-ist visions because we are all Pa-Ting Ba-Ying Boo-Raw! We are as Pa-Ting Ba-Ying Boo-Raw as the sky is green & purple & raspberry!

Soon the human race will join us in our ecstasy! Soon the bird droppings will become the very greatness that our illustrious ears could ever imagine! Because Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism is the very essence of Moon landings, and as you all know Moon landings are the most erotic tarantulas that all the manikins in the storefront windows will ever know!!

So go forth my friends my colleagues my fellow Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ians and spread the great message of Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism!
Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!
Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!!
Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!!!"

And the speech ends. The audience reacts by throwing off their clothes and running out into the streets and marching & running & dancing through downtown naked as they chant & sing & scream & shout:
"Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!
Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!
Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop!"

Copyright 2012 by Wolf Larsen

[hillwalker]

Have you not realised yet that we're bored with your nonsense? Get a life.
You are embarrassing yourself and this website with your inanities.

H

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I still find it funny that he got the name for his new revolutionary manifesto from an idiot criminal who changed his name to Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop.

[hillwalker]

I still find it funny that he got the name for his new revolutionary manifesto from an idiot criminal who changed his name to Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop.

Yeh, it's a hoot. And likely to keep most potentialy new members away. The guy is a loose cannon and if we continue to endorse his self-obsessed ravings this website is doomed. It's in OUR hands.

H

[WolfLarsen]

Somebody said:

The guy is a loose cannon and if we continue to endorse his self-obsessed ravings this website is doomed. It's in OUR hands

Those are my feelings about cyber bullies exactly. Cyber bullys are bad for websites. Actually, I've received e-mails from people who've left this very site because of certain cyber bullies. Cyber bullies scare new members away.

[Darcy88]

Yeh, it's a hoot. And likely to keep most potentialy new members away. The guy is a loose cannon and if we continue to endorse his self-obsessed ravings this website is doomed. It's in OUR hands.

H

I agree. I've decided to stop posting in his threads unless they contain a serious creative effort.

Wolf, he's not bullying. He's pointing out the obvious. Post more stuff like your longshore-man piece. It wasn't bad. The nonsense stuff contributes nothing to this community.

[WolfLarsen]

I will write whatever I want to write.

[MarkBastable]

I will write whatever I want to write.

So you should. That's your right. But as soon as you make it available to readers, those readers have the right to say whatever they want to say.

[WolfLarsen]

And if people have the right to say what they want others have the right to write whatever they want.

If you look at some of the HillWalker's latest posts he seems to be engaged in a campaign to kick writers off this board whose writing style he disagrees with. Nobody should be kicked off a posting board for expressing what is supposeded to be their right to write whatever they choose.


I'll ignore cyber bullies up to the point where they try to engage in censorship. And frankly, not just Hillwalker but one or two others have run other innovative writers off this board with their cyber bullying. Anybody with two eyes can see that some of these "critiques" of newer members posts in particular are nothing more than hostility coming from individuals with anger management problems. I think it's sad when people leave this website because of cyber bullying. Cyber bullying scares off new members, and it's bad for morale.

There's a difference between cyber bullying and simply saying you don't care for a piece. There's a world of difference, and anyone with two eyes can see that. I'm not the first person to make this observation either.

[Delta40]

Anyway, why do you guys care about Wolf at all? I've met dozens of kids like him. They wear ironic berets, make videos of meat rotting and call it "groundbreaking" then complain about how no one understands their art (oh, but they will - all of the greatest artists skyrocketed after their death, don't you know?

How comforting to know that pleb Lit-Nutters can rely on your objective conclusions about people. In future, rather than form my own opinion, I'll seek your advice before posting.

[Darcy88]

I will write whatever I want to write.

I'll read and dislike whatever I want to read and dislike and if you take issue with what myself and others say then post something we'll have nice things to say about. The reader is a better judge of a poem's merit than the poet himself, otherwise every poet who has ever fancied himself a genius would be right, myself included. I've written nonsense poetry too. Never though have I dedicated three threads to it and gotten defensive when others fail to proclaim it gold.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

If you look at some of the HillWalker's latest posts he seems to be engaged in a campaign to kick writers off this board whose writing style he disagrees with.

Where has he "campaigned" to get you kicked off the board? And who else is he trying to get kicked off?

The problem with your continuos argument of you being picked on because you're innovative and edgy is that you're just not. Hell, we had a poster give example of poems almost a hundred years old doing way more outlandish stuff than you've ever done. And what do you do? Continue posting the same kind of stuff and claiming it's innovative and edgy. It's frustrating, Wolf.

[Bewlay Brother]

I will take a stab at being outlandish.

Here we go: (not worthy of own thread)

I was sitting on the sandpapered floor
In a funhouse surrounded by all the funhouse mirrors
When suddenly a crayfish crawled past
It moved so slow and so stupid and so inconsequential

And then... the tranquility came
And then...
I never said anything interesting, again.

[Taliesin]

This stuff looks like a Discordian exercise, maybe best read as a zen-koan. Then again, maybe not.
Quoting Principia Discordia


.A ZEN STORY by Camden Benares, The Count of Five
Headmaster, Camp Meeker Cabal

A serious young man found the conflicts of mid 20th Century America confusing. He went to many people seeking a way of resolving within himself the discords that troubled him, but he remained troubled.

One night in a coffee house, a self-ordained Zen Master said to him, "go to the dilapidated mansion you will find at this address which I have written down for you. Do not speak to those who live there; you must remain silent until the moon rises tomorrow night. Go to the large room on the right of the main hallway, sit in the lotus position on top of the rubble in the northeast corner, face the corner, and meditate."

He did just as the Zen Master instructed. His meditation was frequently interrupted by worries. He worried whether or not the rest of the plumbing fixtures would fall from the second floor bathroom to join the pipes and other trash he was sitting on. He worried how would he know when the moon rose on the next night. He worried about what the people who walked through the room said about him.

His worrying and meditation were disturbed when, as if in a test of his faith, ordure fell from the second floor onto him. At that time two people walked into the room. The first asked the second who the man was sitting there was. The second replied "Some say he is a holy man. Others say he is a s***head."

Hearing this, the man was enlightened.

[WolfLarsen]

A Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ist Public Service Announcement
by Wolf Larsen

Immediately! Frong - frip - twwwwwiiiiing! It's time for the underwear wars of the saints of Goo - Tyyy - Wong to invade all our minds! Stay calm! Panic! Do everything right now!
In addition, no one shall wear underwear ever again for the remainder of history! It's time to wear our shoes on top of our heads! Walk around public naked while you scream out obscenities at the Moon & the Sun because do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do!
Froooooooooooomph! From this day forward everyone shall immediately change their names! Find the most fooorip-pliping-gorockety name that you can think of and give it to yourself! Think of some puuuuuroop kind of name and give it to your dog! Get your penis a dopoofritzt kind of name! Give your pussy a nuuuumrrock-licky-Yum Yum kind of name! Give whichever hand you masturbate with its own up-Amsterdam-down-Amsterdam-up-Amsterdam-down kind of name! Call your television set anything but television set because it's time for new ping-ponging kablopity names for everything!
Hello and goodbye! Don't forget! Tomorrow is I forgot my clothes at home day! Nobody will wear clothes tomorrow - nowhere in the entire world!
And finally a great big yiiiippppeeeeeeeeeeee to everybody!

Copyright 2012 Wolf Larsen

[Scheherazade]

W a r n i n g

Please do not personalise your arguments.

It is the works that we discuss, not the people who write them.

If find yourself unable to receive negative criticism as well as the positive ones,

please refrain from posting your work in a public forum.

[WolfLarsen]

The new Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop-ism
An interview with myself, Wolf Larsen

Question: Bleepity-schleepity sclroloonnggong fin?
Wolf Larsen answers: Ooooopa Kaaaafrruuump! Icky – icky do-do dow jones mein! SChnip!

Question: Pwaaaooonnk! Scna lu lu lu lu lu la?
Wolf Larsen answers: Dwooooopp! Zwaaaaacka Zwaaaaaaaacka ka-luuuummmmph! Trrriiiinnnngg!

Question: Well, how do you ka-pluuuumphf-tennis shoes -space rocket that?
Wolf Larsen answers: Ka-chiiiiiinnnng! Plamp! Plump! Plimp! Gooooonnnnng!

Question: I see, but if you ratty-chatty-matty, then how can you dance the Martian tree from the underwear ledge at the vibrant personalities zoo, know what I mean?
Wolf Larsen answers: Faaaarrrrt!

Question: Faaaarrrrrt?
Wolf Larsen answers: Always fart! Yes fart! Fart is the answer! Vote for fart! Fight for fart! Love fart! Art for fart!

Question: And what about your right-hand?
Wolf Larsen answers the question by painting everything blue and orange and green.

Copyright 2012 by Wolf Larsen

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

Need more attention now, Wolf? Kind of sucks that you drove hill ofF the boards. He was the only person who took the time to actually try and give thoughtful critiques to your ... work.

[Calidore]

Kind of sucks that you drove hill ofF the boards.

Being fair, hill left in a snit. Nobody drove him anywhere; he has the same power as everyone else to ignore these posts/threads.

I don't have much use for this stuff either, but are dozens of posts about the pointlessness of something any less pointless?

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I don't know. Are they?

[BookBeauty]

I'd like to apologize for my previous post, mostly because Scheherzade is absolutely right. If I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all.

In any case, if your writing has a goal, and you feel that you are striving and reaching higher as a writer, WolfLarsen, then I have no right to admonish your efforts, simply because I don't understand them. It seems that your writing is as religion is to some people-- And perhaps more like poetry: Personal, and perhaps not meant to be understood. And not meant to be constructively critiqued by the uninitiated.

The words that I do understand are a bit crude and disrupt the entire scat-man rhythm it appears that you are attempting to achieve. The zippity doo-wongs do more than the 'fart', that is.

It kind of reminds me of the monkeys in the Jungle book, doing their random, crazy singing and making rhythmic noises. You know, that song with Baloo the bear and the Monkey King, and they sing, ''I wanna be like you!'' ?

Maybe there's some kind of jazzy melody in the background? :)

But again, in my opinion at least, stylistically the words chosen can be more 'cool cat', if you know what I'm saying.

Just my two cents. :)

[Darcy88]

Being fair, hill left in a snit. Nobody drove him anywhere; he has the same power as everyone else to ignore these posts/threads.

I don't have much use for this stuff either, but are dozens of posts about the pointlessness of something any less pointless?

If you were at a luncheon and someone began to hectically gesticulate and incoherently babble, and persisted to do so in the face of repeated remonstrance, driving you to leave in a subsequent fit of frustration, the responsibility for your departure would not belong to you alone.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I'd like to apologize for my previous post, mostly because Scheherzade is absolutely right. If I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all.

In any case, if your writing has a goal, and you feel that you are striving and reaching higher as a writer, WolfLarsen, then I have no right to admonish your efforts, simply because I don't understand them. It seems that your writing is as religion is to some people-- And perhaps more like poetry: Personal, and perhaps not meant to be understood. And not meant to be constructively critiqued by the uninitiated.

The words that I do understand are a bit crude and disrupt the entire scat-man rhythm it appears that you are attempting to achieve. The zippity doo-wongs do more than the 'fart', that is.

It kind of reminds me of the monkeys in the Jungle book, doing their random, crazy singing and making rhythmic noises. You know, that song with Baloo the bear and the Monkey King, and they sing, ''I wanna be like you!'' ?

Maybe there's some kind of jazzy melody in the background? :)

But again, in my opinion at least, stylistically the words chosen can be more 'cool cat', if you know what I'm saying.

Just my two cents. :)
Funny you should mention jazz, because all Wolf is really doing is scat, a singing method started in the 30s by jazz singers in an attempt to use their voice as a pure instrument, without words. Louis Prima, who voiced the main ape in The Jungle Book, was known for doing scat.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I'd like to apologize for my previous post, mostly because Scheherzade is absolutely right. If I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all.

In any case, if your writing has a goal, and you feel that you are striving and reaching higher as a writer, WolfLarsen, then I have no right to admonish your efforts, simply because I don't understand them. It seems that your writing is as religion is to some people-- And perhaps more like poetry: Personal, and perhaps not meant to be understood. And not meant to be constructively critiqued by the uninitiated.

The words that I do understand are a bit crude and disrupt the entire scat-man rhythm it appears that you are attempting to achieve. The zippity doo-wongs do more than the 'fart', that is.

It kind of reminds me of the monkeys in the Jungle book, doing their random, crazy singing and making rhythmic noises. You know, that song with Baloo the bear and the Monkey King, and they sing, ''I wanna be like you!'' ?

Maybe there's some kind of jazzy melody in the background? :)

But again, in my opinion at least, stylistically the words chosen can be more 'cool cat', if you know what I'm saying.

Just my two cents. :)
Funny you should mention jazz, because all Wolf is really doing is scat, a singing method started in the 30s by jazz singers in an attempt to use their voice as a pure instrument, without words. Louis Prima, who voiced the main ape in The Jungle Book, was known for doing scat.

Edit: This may have come off as a bit patronizing to you, BookBeautt, as I only skimmed your post before replying. You obviously know what scat is already.

[BookBeauty]

No worries, Mutatis-Mutandi! :) I often do the same thing.

I wonder if WolfLarsen sings his posts out loud before he puts them out here. :D

[MarkBastable]

I'd like to apologize for my previous post, mostly because Scheherzade is absolutely right. If I don't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all.



Actually, I think that's exactly what Scheherezade didn't say. What she said was, "If you can't bear to hear something not nice, don't say anything at all." In other words, addressing those who post their work, 'not everyone's going to be nice about it, so if you can't take that, keep your writing to yourself'.

If she'd said what you interpreted she said, I for one would be out of here so fast that the vacuum would close with a pop behind me - partly because that'd be no way to run a literature site, and secondly because, if the choice was to say something nice or say nothing, there'd be very little point my being here.

[BookBeauty]

Ah! I went back and re-read what was posted, and I now see that I was in error in my interpretation. It appears it was about the reception of criticism rather than the writing of criticism. And yet, I am still hesitant to withdraw my previous statement. I was a bit harsh upon first glance.

[Calidore]

If you were at a luncheon and someone began to hectically gesticulate and incoherently babble, and persisted to do so in the face of repeated remonstrance, driving you to leave in a subsequent fit of frustration, the responsibility for your departure would not belong to you alone.

At a luncheon, where everyone is physically present together, sure. But this is an online forum, where you must go to the babble, rather than the babble being in your face. We all choose to click on a thread or not, and thus any frustration with the contents of that thread is purely self-inflicted.