CinDRnyc
01-12-2012, 12:14 AM
So, I have to do a 1200 word personal narrative and it CAN be fictional. I have a super rough draft but am working on it right now. What do you think of my Introduction?
Does it create interest?
Is my thesis clear?
Does it make you want to keep reading?
Thanks! I will post the whole thing tomorrow when I am finished revising
Unexpected Beginnings (might change this)
From the outside looking in, it appeared I was living the American Dream. I had a successful career as a Nurse Practitioner, a loving husband, and a wonderful family. Suddenly, a turn of events caused the good things in my life to come crashing down on me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. After months of trying to have a baby, my husband Steven and I were informed that we would not be able to conceive a child together due to his azoospermia. How could my heart feel so warm and so cold at the same time? As we tried our best to cope with this news, I received a call that would change my life forever. To my surprise, my negative circumstances would soon be transformed into a positive opportunity because Steven and I would be given a chance to give a child a loving home and raise him as if he was our own son.
Does it create interest?
Is my thesis clear?
Does it make you want to keep reading?
Thanks! I will post the whole thing tomorrow when I am finished revising
Unexpected Beginnings (might change this)
From the outside looking in, it appeared I was living the American Dream. I had a successful career as a Nurse Practitioner, a loving husband, and a wonderful family. Suddenly, a turn of events caused the good things in my life to come crashing down on me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. After months of trying to have a baby, my husband Steven and I were informed that we would not be able to conceive a child together due to his azoospermia. How could my heart feel so warm and so cold at the same time? As we tried our best to cope with this news, I received a call that would change my life forever. To my surprise, my negative circumstances would soon be transformed into a positive opportunity because Steven and I would be given a chance to give a child a loving home and raise him as if he was our own son.