Nothing.

[Little Gal]

I cannot feel life passing like a line beneath my palms.
I cannot hear words coming directly.
If a squirrel moves,
Or a ripple drops
What does it mean, mean to me?
I am without words
And not without them too.
I am just some particle of anything that you tread on.
Or may be,
I am what you call something, a someone or
Or may be I am like a stopped move
Of a little bent leaf
Stuck in snow.

[PrinceMyshkin]

A "stopped move" is a wonderfully evocative phrase, consistent of course with the whole of this metaphysical meditation.

[Jerrybaldy]

It felt very vulnerable and dream like and even the font colour seemed to fit. I stumbled on the repitition of 'or' at the end of line 10 and the start of line 11. The last three lines capped it off nicely and I enjoyed :)

[Little Gal]

A "stopped move" is a wonderfully evocative phrase, consistent of course with the whole of this metaphysical meditation.

:) well put, thank you.

[Little Gal]

It felt very vulnerable and dream like and even the font colour seemed to fit. I stumbled on the repitition of 'or' at the end of line 10 and the start of line 11. The last three lines capped it off nicely and I enjoyed :)

the repetition ... is half willed and half unconsciously woven, it came easily like anything natural...it is a "something" that was in the mind when the line was crossing it and I couldn't do without it somehow..

Thank you :)

[Bar22do]

Touching reflections on life and one's own place in it, with a beautiful ending!!!
I tinkered a bit with your poem to see how to avoid repetition, hope it's alright but of course do ignore if not of help, I sure might have taken a wrong path. In any case, I enjoyed the thoughts you shared, thank you and best to you, Bar:

I can't let life pass like that line
etched in my palms.
I don't hear words coming directly.
If a squirrel moves, or a ripple drops,
what does it mean to me?
I am with and without words, perhaps
a particle of something that you tread on,
a something, someone, or just
an abated whizz of a little, bent leaf
stuck in snow.

[Little Gal]

Touching reflections on life and one's own place in it, with a beautiful ending!!!
I tinkered a bit with your poem to see how to avoid repetition, hope it's alright but of course do ignore if not of help, I sure might have taken a wrong path. In any case, I enjoyed the thoughts you shared, thank you and best to you, Bar:

I can't let life pass like that line
etched in my palms.
I don't hear words coming directly.
If a squirrel moves, or a ripple drops,
what does it mean to me?
I am with and without words, perhaps
a particle of something that you tread on,
a something, someone, or just
an abated whizz of a little, bent leaf
stuck in snow.


I thank you for the attempt..
I like it... it sounds crisp with an added suddenness that makes d meaning come more vividly..
well done... :)