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[David Strugnell]

a breeze desired me soon
you desired you
a desire loved them
he surrendered for us
the desiring fantasy cuddled the desiring breeze gently
the sad love danced
the rose anguished carefully
he desired him soon
she whispered in the languishing kiss
a kiss died

[WolfLarsen]

This is good. But forget about roses. Roses are cliché. Stomp the roses into the asphalt with your shoes! Languishing kiss is weak, languishing kiss seems cliché. Kill the "breeze gently" - turn the breeze into something more powerful and passionate.

Anyway, that's what I think. Do whatever you want! As is it's a good poem.