No title

[hanzklein]

She's in the water right now
Frail is the tender white boned arm
And frailer still the soul!
When a moment sudden, the nimbus turns stormy
Her complexion is all affrighted as a deer's
I take her to my breast,
My heart panting
And she enchanting

But the waves are cruel
Who will hold thee? Not me
Michaela!

[hillwalker]

This is really rather good - I loved the opening 3 lines.

But I found the 'And she enchanting' line hard to swallow.
There's nothing here to convey how she is 'enchanting' so making such a bald statement at the end of something more enigmatic spoils the illusion.
Was it perhaps slipped in to supply a little rhyme? It reads that way - and the poem would probably survive without it.

H