Throwaways

[Jack of Hearts]

Removed by author.

[hillwalker]

There's a lot to take in here - you're obviously mining a rich seam at the moment. Some read like works in progress and it might be interesting to see where they take you a couple of months down the line. But the stand-out one for me was the first - I can't get that one out of my mind.

H

[Hawkman]

I'd have to agree with hill that there is rather a lot to take in and comment on in a single post. I've definitely seen The Good Lieutenant before, but I'm not sure how much revision you've given it. The first one, or at least elements of it, also feel familliar, especially "the smack-smack tile floor," which is very striking.

in viii I hope, "The great strip-ed temple" is a typo.

H

[tailor STATELY]

Throwaways ? There's some meat on the bone here I found rare.

i. and iv. stand out for me. viii. shows promise, though I'm a bit ambivalent on ascertaining your intention.

If your unhappy with them put them in a folder marked works in progress (although all poems are works in progress in my world).

Thank you for sharing.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[Jack of Hearts]

Thanks you three. These are the ones sitting in purgatory, no life in them, etc. None of them are new. Part of the reason for this thread's existence is archival purposes- this reader reads your archives, his archives, archives of members who left here a long time ago and so forth. It felt handy to put all of these in one place rather than hidden in LitNet's back pages, and maybe get them read too.







J