Please help!

[Lyn05]

Hello! I’m currently preparing for my English Literature exam, but I have problems with producing quality work-sometimes I get it, sometimes I don’t. I often have the issue of “narration” as well. When are you giving an idea of what’s happening and then explaining its significance, and when is it narration?

I’ve read the thread “What makes a good literary essay!?” and I hope that I have applied some of the tips provided in the following content paragraph. Please critique! Any comment is greatly appreciated!

Q: Wide Sargasso Sea is a novel that challenges and questions the status quo. How far do you agree?


The status quo is often determined by differences in wealth or racial identity, with the rich being seen to be more superior to the poor, and in the context of Wide Sargasso Sea, whites to the blacks. However, this perception is challenged and questioned by the novel, as exemplified by the treatment of Antoinette Cosway and her family, Rochester as well as the blacks.


Wide Sargasso Sea challenges the perception that the whites are superior to the blacks. The whites used to be the colonial rulers who enslaved the blacks, and despite the passing of the Emancipation Act, the whites seem to have maintained the status quo. Antoinette and her family, being White Creoles, appear to be privileged amongst the natives in Jamaica. They have Christophine, a Martinique woman, as a servant, and some of the Jamaican women come to help with the household chores. However, their service to the Cosways is not a result of racial supremacy. Christophine continues to serve the Cosways only out of her own will-because “she wanted to stay”. Annette even says that they “would have died if [Christophine]’d turn against [them]”. As such, the Cosways had no actual power over their servant, and the perceived white supremacy counts for nothing in terms of status. In addition, the Jamaican women only came to help because they were “terrified of [Christophine]”, and not because of the Cosway’s racial identity. In fact, Antoinette and her family are often snubbed by the Jamaicans, being called derogatory names like “white cockroaches”. The status quo is thus challenged and questioned. The whites who seemingly have more authority over their black counterparts are actually more powerless and vulnerable.

Some other questions I’d like to ask:
1) Do I have to underline the novel’s title every time I write it?
2) Have I used the brackets in the quotes correctly e.g. when changing word forms?

[hillwalker]

I'm not aware it's necessary to underline the name of a work when discussing it - unless that's the convention used in your particular college.

Bracketting your own words that do not appear in the original quote but that you have included to make sense - yes, that's fine and you seem to have got the hang of it. It's a bit light on relevant quotes by the way, but in such a short piece that's probably to be understood.

if you were looking to tighten this up you might consider removing 'more' from the phrase 'more superior' since the phrase as it stands implies the rich and poor are both superior.

The opening sentence of paragraph 2 recyclces what you've already said in the closing sentence of the preceding paragraph - so are both necessary?

And you've skirted around the issue of the roles played by whites and blacks - the whites would be unable to survive without Christophine which almost reverses the notion of who is master and who is slave. You mention it briefly in your final sentence but perhaps you could expand on this - how the status quo has almost been turned on its head because the whites have allowed themselves to become reliant on other people.

H

[Lyn05]

Thank you, hill :) I was worried I was narrating again.

Here's a second attempt...


The status quo is often determined by differences in wealth or racial identity, with the rich being seen to be superior to the poor, and in the context of Wide Sargasso Sea, whites to the blacks. However, this perception is challenged and questioned by the novel, as exemplified by the treatment of Antoinette Cosway and her family.

The whites used to be the colonial rulers who enslaved the blacks, and despite the passing of the Emancipation Act, the whites seem to have maintained the status quo. Antoinette and her family, being White Creoles, appear to be privileged amongst the natives in Jamaica. They have Christophine, a Martinique woman, as a servant, and some of the Jamaican women come to help with the household chores. However, their service to the Cosways is not a result of racial supremacy. Christophine continues to serve the Cosways only out of her own will-because “she wanted to stay”. Annette even says that they “would have died if [Christophine]’d turn against [them]”. As such, the Cosways had no actual power over their servant, and the perceived white supremacy counts for nothing in terms of status. In addition, the Jamaican women only came to help because they were “terrified of [Christophine]”, and not because of the Cosway’s racial identity. As Antoinette explains, “That, I soon discovered, was why they ever came at all-for she never paid them.” The fact that Christophine, a mere servant, is the one who has the ability to gather the Jamaicans to work for her- and for free- only serves to undermine the authority of the whites further. The Cosways are heavily dependent on Christophine for survival, but the status quo should have been the opposite.

Antoinette and her family are also snubbed by the Jamaicans, being called derogatory names like “white cockroaches” and “white niggers”, implying that the Jamaicans have neither respect nor fear of them. The status quo is challenged once more when the blacks set fire to Coulibri, killing Pierre and leaving behind only “blackened walls”. Here, Mr Mason’s claim that the blacks are “too damn lazy to be dangerous” is proved to be severely wrong. The blacks are not fearful of them at all, and in fact dared to rise up against them. Again, the whites’ authority is challenged and the blacks have in fact gained power over the whites, destroying their home and instilling fear.

The status quo is thus challenged and questioned. The whites who seemingly have more authority over their black counterparts are actually more powerless and vulnerable. There almost exists a reversal in the status quo, where it is now the whites who are at the mercy of the blacks.

[hillwalker]

That's much better - and it's fine as it stands I should think apart from this one sentence that is open to misinterpretation :

However, their service to the Cosways is not a result of racial supremacy.

It reads as if you are implying the servants possess racial supremacy rather than inferiority. You need to specify whose racial supremacy you are referring to.

H

[Lyn05]

Noted! And thank you so much for your time and patience in correcting this!:D