Arizona I Remember You part 1: December 7th, 1941

[kangels4ever]

Removed prior to posting of entire completed story.

[kangels4ever]

Um, I take it nobody here is into this style of historical fiction? Or are folks waiting for part 2?
Sorry to sound insecure. Just am really pleased with this story and proud to be "getting it right" much I can.

[hillwalker]

There's nothing wrong with your writing style - it's just that this topic is not one I find at all interesting (not your fault incidentally - my own blind spot).

I am sure there will be many who enjoyed it - but sometimes there's little one can add. My only criticism would be the rather melodramatic internal dialogue.Obviously anyone witnessing such events would be fired up, and would be given to the occasional curse, but it's not often a writer is able to use this alone to convey events vividly. If anything it makes the reaction a little too cartoon-ish. It reminded me of the old Batman comics with 'Zap', 'Pow' and 'Holy Smoke' thrown in to suggest action.

Good luck with Part 2 as you have obviously researched this topic and put effort into the piece.

H