What has love given to your life?

[osho]

Love is not always a juice of joy but also a potion of venom too. We know for sure many people have been unhappier in love than they were not in love.

There is 50 % chance and today there are 80 % chance to end up in separation.

Love makes life really lovelier and every moment really bubblier and our the partners all the merrier.

But the reality of it is something else.

I am not cynical about it

I want to hear your voice

[endgame]

according to me there are lots of kind of "love". i dont't think it's just about a man and a woman. we all said once "i love that" or "i love him/her".. that's absolutely good and beautiful but i don't think we should think just about this kind of love. anyway i agree with you. above all nowadays we see lots of people, too many according to me, that when they first met it's like their realtionship will last forever but then, when troubles star, everything ens and nothing else matter. personally i don't think it's going to be better, even if i hope so. i believe the worst side of these relationships is the lack of respect and faith. what do you think about it? i'd be very happy if you answered me. i think it's important to talk to other people and know what they think. it's a chance to grow :)))

[cl154576]

To love is to suffer and there can be no love otherwise.
- Fyodor Dostoevsky.


To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.
- Woody Allen.


What has love given to your life?
Hell.

[irinmisfit92]

I've gone through really bad online relationships, and most of the time the guys I like in real life have no interest in me. It's a complicated life, really. My friend commented that I keep getting over people. It's good because I attempt to move on, but at the same time it feels pathetic because my love are always unrequited. Whenever someone comes up and it seems that it's going to work, there are more problems and I choose to back down because I don't want to hurt them. Through love, I've learnt to be more mature and not to be selfish and really think about what I want. If I don't want this person to be with me, I'd rather be alone than hurt him because I need someone and he can fill that, but once a better person comes along my feelings for him may break down.

Love is the most important thing in my life. I'm a lonely person and I always do my best to love other people and show them that I care no matter what. The problem is that people drift away really fast; especially friends. I guess in the end love is important but people should be able to be independent as well.

[Maximilianus]

What has love given to your life?
A salad of disillusion, bitterness and rage. I may be skipping an ingredient, since I'm hardly ever a good cook.

[Maryd.]

Hell.

That seems to be the on going theme here! Hell indeed!


A salad of disillusion, bitterness and rage. I may be skipping an ingredient, since I'm hardly ever a good cook.

See... The pattern. I can.

[Delta40]

It has taught me to be forgiving not only to others but especially to myself. It has taught me to get up off the ground when I'm ready and move on as a wiser more changed person. It has taught me that any negative can be transformed into a positive.

[Maryd.]

It has taught me to be forgiving not only to others but especially to myself. It has taught me to get up off the ground when I'm ready and move on as a wiser more changed person. It has taught me that any negative can be transformed into a positive.

Oh look... One person is saved.

You go girl.. :)

[Delta40]

lol. There is nothing like owning the role you played in the deterioration of a relationship and saying you're sorry. It releases you, even if the other person never reciprocates!

My reasoning is this: If a relationship is going really well, we don't say to our partner 'This relationship is fantastic and it's all your fault!' No. We actually take credit for it's success. So take some credit for it's failure, own it, apologise and be wiser.

[Maryd.]

lol. There is nothing like owning the role you played in the deterioration of a relationship and saying you're sorry. It releases you, even if the other person never reciprocates!

My reasoning is this: If a relationship is going really well, we don't say to our partner 'This relationship is fantastic and it's all your fault!' No. We actually take credit for it's success. So take some credit for it's failure, own it, apologise and be wiser.

Even when it never really failed?... It just stopped in it's tracks... Like a magician forming a disappearing act.

[Delta40]

Even when it never really failed?... It just stopped in it's tracks... Like a magician forming a disappearing act.

Of course. We all have a personal stake and responsibility in maintaining relationships. Knowing when to call it quits is up to us too. Many people just don't want to make life changing decisions and 'blame' the other for their misery. Some people revel in misery and make it their favourite topic. Why? because they have lived a powerless existence and relied on others to define them. This prevents people from ever having to take personal responsibility for their own happiness and wellbeing.

Sounds like theory but it works in practice - with a few bumps along the way.

[Maryd.]

Of course. We all have a personal stake and responsibility in maintaining relationships. Knowing when to call it quits is up to us too. Many people just don't want to make life changing decisions and 'blame' the other for their misery. Some people revel in misery and make it their favourite topic. Why? because they have lived a powerless existence and relied on others to define them. This prevents people from ever having to take personal responsibility for their own happiness and wellbeing.

Sounds like theory but it works in practice - with a few bumps along the way.

Interesting... You sound like a philosopher.

[OrphanPip]

I haven't yet had a really bad experience with romantic relationships. Frankly, they've been the most fulfilling, happy experiences of my life. And most of them have ended amicably.

[Delta40]

God no! I have two older brothers. One raped me when we were younger and the other used to bash and urinate all over me. They say siblings are actually your first authentic marriage partners.

If I travelled through the rest of my life holding both of them 100% accountable for the relationship we have today, I deny myself the power to shape my own destiny and redefine our adult sibling relationship. It's very difficult but I love my brothers and understanding our history and circumstances has allowed me to forgive (a work in progress sometimes!) their actions but also to forgive myself for allowing it to happen. I believe the strength of my love today outweighs fear and hurt which dwells in the past.

I also know that I have set boundaries on responsibility. This means I won't go so far a distance and put myself at risk in the name of love and reconciliation. I must know what my limitations are, what my responsibility is and the rest is up to my brothers. If I don't reconcile with them, it won't be from inaction on my part and I honestly can live with that. I deserve to do my best and settle for that, regardless of the outcome.

I hope you can understand what I mean.

[JuniperWoolf]

What has love given to your life?

Herpes.















(kidding)

[Maryd.]

God no! I have two older brothers. One raped me when we were younger and the other used to bash and urinate all over me. They say siblings are actually your first authentic marriage partners.

If I travelled through the rest of my life holding both of them 100% accountable for the relationship we have today, I deny myself the power to shape my own destiny and redefine our adult sibling relationship. It's very difficult but I love my brothers and understanding our history and circumstances has allowed me to forgive (a work in progress sometimes!) their actions but also to forgive myself for allowing it to happen. I believe the strength of my love today outweighs fear and hurt which dwells in the past.

I also know that I have set boundaries on responsibility. This means I won't go so far a distance and put myself at risk in the name of love and reconciliation. I must know what my limitations are, what my responsibility is and the rest is up to my brothers. If I don't reconcile with them, it won't be from inaction on my part and I honestly can live with that. I deserve to do my best and settle for that, regardless of the outcome.

I hope you can understand what I mean.

Golly, I had no idea this happened to you. The fact that you can forgive them (or at least try to) is a feat in itself. You have just become my hero. :)

You are so much more stronger than I am. And love will love you back. ♥

[osho]

God no! I have two older brothers. One raped me when we were younger and the other used to bash and urinate all over me. They say siblings are actually your first authentic marriage partners.

If I travelled through the rest of my life holding both of them 100% accountable for the relationship we have today, I deny myself the power to shape my own destiny and redefine our adult sibling relationship. It's very difficult but I love my brothers and understanding our history and circumstances has allowed me to forgive (a work in progress sometimes!) their actions but also to forgive myself for allowing it to happen. I believe the strength of my love today outweighs fear and hurt which dwells in the past.

I also know that I have set boundaries on responsibility. This means I won't go so far a distance and put myself at risk in the name of love and reconciliation. I must know what my limitations are, what my responsibility is and the rest is up to my brothers. If I don't reconcile with them, it won't be from inaction on my part and I honestly can live with that. I deserve to do my best and settle for that, regardless of the outcome.

I hope you can understand what I mean.

If your statement is true I assert you are a rare species on this planet and that demands conservation. If we have this mindset the world will really be a wonderful place to live in.
I have been deeply stirred by your sense of human relationship and tolerance. That enables us to reconcile with the conflicting human values, interests and human behaviors.

I believe that the love that can endure such dire situations is sustainable. What we call love or take it to be in the ordinary course of life is infatuation only, not love. The objective is to gratify physical or impulsive desires that crop up when our hormonal contents are brimming

[osho]

I've gone through really bad online relationships, and most of the time the guys I like in real life have no interest in me. It's a complicated life, really. My friend commented that I keep getting over people. It's good because I attempt to move on, but at the same time it feels pathetic because my love are always unrequited. Whenever someone comes up and it seems that it's going to work, there are more problems and I choose to back down because I don't want to hurt them. Through love, I've learnt to be more mature and not to be selfish and really think about what I want. If I don't want this person to be with me, I'd rather be alone than hurt him because I need someone and he can fill that, but once a better person comes along my feelings for him may break down.

Love is the most important thing in my life. I'm a lonely person and I always do my best to love other people and show them that I care no matter what. The problem is that people drift away really fast; especially friends. I guess in the end love is important but people should be able to be independent as well.

Thank you for sharing your situations on this tread. I am your friend, and all I can do is listen to you and empathize with you.

Yet the world is too big for you too worry. There are bad people, but good people too. I am not cynical about the way things work in this world.

Your experiences, bitter or sweeter will reinforce you, making you all the stronger.

You must not let down yourself.

Live as a witness and broaden your horizon of life to include more and more people and you will find plenty of people to love and care for you

[Arrowni]

Love has given me self-awareness. By being loved I realized I hated myself, and that I could change that. After such realization love can punk me all it wants, but I won't stop being grateful.