College Summers

[S.Daedalus]

College Summers
I've returned home to find I'm not at home.
I used to think some things were eternal.
The old 'crew' has reunited tonight;
there is much talking, but little is said.
The night feels like an old puzzle left in the rain:
the pieces look the same, but they no longer mesh.

Within me (and presumably the others)
grows a galaxy of longing
furiously (and futilely) expanding,
desperate for significance.
The universe can't help but laugh.
No one can blame us for trying.

[Delta40]

nice metaphors!

[zhannochka]

Love this line! The night feels like an old puzzle left in the rain:
the pieces look the same, but they no longer mesh.

[Jack of Hearts]

True, though.







J

[S.Daedalus]

Thanks delta and zhannochka!

JoH: Unfortunate, isn't it?

[Jack of Hearts]

You'd think so at first. But what's really unfortunate is the illusion of things being constant. If, at age 7, someone had successfully impressed upon this reader that everything is in flux and fleeting, he might have enjoyed that youth in the way one admires a bite of good food- the half of its beauty is that it must pass.


Sorry for the digression. Keep posting Stephen Hero.





J

[hillwalker]

It's good to read a poem about a slice of real life that's neither over-romanticised nor dressed up as something unsufferably profound.

I particularly like the phrase a galaxy of longing; not something exclusive to youth.

More please.

H

[angliholic]

Great ink!
My favorite line--I've returned home to find I'm not at home.

[Hawkman]

Whilst I like what you are saying here I think you need to work on the first strophe. It's very prosy, although the last two lines employ really good metaphor. The second strophe works very well and is much more poetic, although I think you could safely dispense with the parentheses.

Live and be well - H

[everyadventure]

I like this one. "There is much talking, but little is said." Excellent!