La Muerte Espera EDITED!

[TheodoreK.16]

Thanks to everyone's suggestions I have made some changes to this one, they may be minor, but changes are changes :p Enjoy

- Theodore



La Muerte Espera

Sit in your empty house,
take another vile sip,
suck in another sickening drag,
keep on wasting your life with these addictions.

Why don't you slip a noose around your neck,
then kick the chair out from beneath you decaying feet?

Death awaits,
out in the cold rain,
peering through the window.
Looking at his watch,
the time is ticking.
La muerte espera.

[everyadventure]

Certainly less confusing this time around.

[hillwalker]

Indeed better - though I'm not sure why the feet are decaying. But it certainly makes more sense second time around.

H

[Jack of Hearts]

Seems like a step in the right direction. Can't clearly trace a definitive meaning but the emotional aspect is coming across.






J

[Delta40]

I like this and I take it decaying feet is a reflection of the person's quality of life?

[TheodoreK.16]

you got it delta :)

[Delta40]

Phew! I'm so glad. I often miss the crucial parts of poetry so its nice to get it right every now and then!