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View Full Version : Tears Two Times (Goodbye Good Lieutenant)



Jack of Hearts
07-28-2011, 01:25 AM
http://th07.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2010/299/f/3/one_last_drink_by_silverwynd-d31l61c.jpg


Good Lieutenant, you're in the earth now,
I brought two dollar wine up, for what it's worth now.
Nevermind the sonuva***** infront of you,
who tries to drink it down.

And who does you this kindness?
Tell me, who could it be?
On the glass, slim fingerprints of a lover?
or maybe that sonuva*****, Henry,
buried with no wedding ring
because he solved a mystery.

Good Lieutenant, you're in the earth now.
Oh my good lieutenant, in the hearth how
hungeredly fire eats white day photos
of Henry standing next to your lover,
who leaves tears two-times in dirty ground.

Hawkman
07-28-2011, 03:53 AM
This is and intriguing piece Jack. The image which inspired it brings to mind scenes from two very different films and a folk song. The films, Gross Point Blank and Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil both have a scene in a graveyard. In GPB Martin Blank pours a bottle of scotch onto the grave of his father then tosses the bottle aside and in the other one, a voodo ceremony is performed involving booze over the grave of a murdered man. The song (I think) is called Willy MacBride, and is about resting beside the grave of a young soldier killed in WW1.

Your poem is powerful but a little confusing. The narrative mentions Henry, presumably the individual refered to by the stone on which the bottle rests. So why would his fingerprints be on the bottle?

I'm not sure about "hungerdly" when hungrily would seem to be the right choice. But apart from these minor considerations, the "Franky and Jonny" scenario you have built arond the image is pretty good.

Live and be well - H

everyadventure
07-28-2011, 10:30 AM
This poem takes quite a detour. I understand that Henry is someone who stepped in and hooked up with the lieutenant's girl? Not streamlined enough to really understand what's going on here.