Prison of Echoes

[Jack of Hearts]

She's the nurtured night-time
and then a wash-warm bath of day-

but the ink inside my heart's run dry,
each line's a bar within my cage;

I'm imprisoned by faint echoes and
craving warmth for one more day.

[beautiful_heart]

This is a nice short poem. I really like the last four lines. :-)

[hillwalker]

Line 2 is a little ..... not even sure what it is ..... but lines 2 to 4 really resonate. Perhaps the opening needs a reworking since 'She' (the night? or the day???) disappears so quickly one wonders whether or not she ever existed.

H

[Twota]

I like the last 4 lines alot :D

[everyadventure]

A poem full of contrasts. You have two lines that end in "day" and that's a little distracting.