Noiz

[MystyrMystyry]

It Arrives

Slow As A Snail Crawl

At First

And As Quiet

Barely A Whisper

But Soon It Is Feeling

Its Way

Slug-Like

For Entry

Across The Window Pane

It Creeps

Searching For Cracks

Through Which

To Ooze


The Glass Rattles

A Little

Sympathetically

With A Thunderous Truck

And That Signals

The Freefall

Through The Worlds

Within Worlds

As The

Petrol Dragons

Are Released

From An Invisible Gate


Who Will Win Today

In This Space Age

Rat Rage

Four Wheeled


Race

[Delta40]

It's like a slow silent eerie build up to some colossal eruption but of course I really don't know - unless the flag just went down for the Indi 500...

[MystyrMystyry]

That's what early mornings are like around here Delta - from the top of the hill the city bound traffic roars past from 5.30 til 9am - thank the Electro-Engineers for Engineering Earplugs to block my Hearing

[Hawkman]

I find the line spacing and capitalization of every word a bit tiresome I'm afraid, which is a pity because I like the poem. As for the poem itself I think that using a snail reference followed by a slug reference a little later on, doesn't quite work. A subjective opinion, of course, but I'd drop the slug-like completely.

Best, H

[MystyrMystyry]

it arrives
slow as a snail crawl
at first
and as quiet
barely a whisper
but soon it is feeling
its way
for entry
across the window pane
it creeps
searching for cracks
through which
to ooze


the glass rattles
a little
sympathetically
with a thunderous truck
and that signals
the freefall
through the worlds
within worlds
as the
petrol dragons
are released
from an invisible gate


who will win today
in this space age
rat rage
four wheeled


race