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everyadventure
06-02-2011, 01:29 PM
The doctor smiles brightly,
his Adam's apple nodding in agreement.
"Clinical depression is a treatable disease,"
he proclaims, waving a glossy brochure as proof,
pointing at the model's toothy smile.
"Like diabetes, it can be managed with proper medication--"

the rats nibble at plaster walls,
as though they're made of crusted frosting.
I can hear the scrape of their teeth
and spy a pointed nose rooting at a crack.
I rush to plug the chinks
but they slide in, glossy liquid bodies
and sharp shrewd eyes

"--these samples, and we'll have you fixed up in no time."
He hands me the pills, pink and cheerful within their bubbles.
I pop one from its plastic casing,
pinching it between trembling fingers.

Kneeling, I extend it cautiously to a rat.
It sniffs, wiry whiskers grazing skin.
I will myself still, rigid.
The rat considers my offering,
then bites my hand.

With the promise of blood,
the rats descend.

PrinceMyshkin
06-02-2011, 02:38 PM
OMG! This starts out as a sober, intelligent report on a familiar enough quandary but with the protagonist's offering of the anti-depressive to one of the rats, it nose-dives into frantasy! Amazing bit of imagination.

MystyrMystyry
06-02-2011, 03:03 PM
Bizarrely brilliant!

Jerrybaldy
06-02-2011, 03:54 PM
Brilliant. The blending between the surgery and the place where the plaster walls are of crusted frosting. Lovely two line climax too. Right up my street Miss adventure.

tailor STATELY
06-02-2011, 07:17 PM
Agreed. Delightfully chilling; and so compact.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

everyadventure
06-03-2011, 10:15 AM
"Frantasy," haven't heard that word before but I like it :)

Hawkman
06-03-2011, 10:40 AM
Sorry ea, I missed this one. Great poem.

Live and be well, H

Jerrybaldy
06-04-2011, 05:21 PM
I learnt this from Prince..... BUMP :)

NoRule
06-05-2011, 01:53 AM
everyadventure,

I enjoyed this a lot. Like PrinceMyshkin stated, it is very imaginitive. The idea is unique, something I doubt someone will re-create any time soon if ever.
NoRule

Buh4Bee
06-05-2011, 08:36 AM
So interesting and strangely sobering.

zoolane
06-05-2011, 02:59 PM
I love this poem, I understand doctors room is very familiar to lots poeple suffers but then mind talk which relay the person races and want to get pills to rats instead swallowing them like probably all patients in nuts house would glad do.

_Shannon_
06-05-2011, 09:53 PM
This totally rules!