Artificial Sweetener

[Delta40]

You burst through my misery
like an overflowing bucket of popcorn.
My aura extinguishes your bounce.
Check.
Exuberance fizzles out, a recoiling snake hissing.
Even for you, I won't glitter on demand.
A mug of tepid coffee waits to be sweetened.
You speak in sugarcubes of recycled, plastic glee.
I exist somewhere between a slow death choke
and the impatient drum of your fingers.
Snap
Out
Of
It!

[deryk]

This poem gives me that somnolent ache of waking up too quickly. The speaker is falling short at jumping out of their own skin. It really SMACKS HARD of displacement. The poem works quite well as a suppressed scream.

Addendum: I also appreciate how the shape of the poem is both blunt and sharp, as though the form is further incensing the voice.

[hillwalker]

Oh how I feel for the narrator - blasted by an unwelcome bombardment of over-exuberant cheeriness from some well-meaning friend no doubt.

Great title and deftly handled as ever.

H

[tailor STATELY]

Love this:
Exuberance fizzles out, a recoiling snake hissing.
Even for you, I won't glitter on demand.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[libernaut]

is this meant to be funny?

[Delta40]

is this meant to be funny?

No. I was serious...

[Cunninglinguist]

No. I was serious...

Seriously funny? Hah, kidding :angel:

[Hawkman]

Generally I'm not a fan of "Shaped" poems, I think the term is concrete poetry, but your mushroom cloud of misery is rather effective :D Youv'e got some great images in here:

"You speak in sugarcubes of recycled, plastic glee.
I exist somewhere between a slow death choke
and the impatient drum of your fingers."

Nice!

Live and be well - H

[kittypaws]

Don't you wish that people would just let you be?

We all have our own definition of happiness.

At least that was my read!
Thanks Delta.....thoroughly enjoyed this.


kittypaws