Biggus
05-09-2011, 04:47 AM
MILESTONE BIRTHDAY
I’ve been dreading, turning forty,
But it occurred to me then
That I won’t really be 40
I’ll just be thirty 10
SENIOR RETIREMENT
At last I’m retired
It’s just what I desired
So goodbye to the tension
And hello to my pension
ABRASIVE BEHAVIOUR
I have been charged with murdering a man
With sandpaper, the really course grit
But I’m pleading it down to manslaughter
Because I only meant to rough him up a bit
EMBRACE WITH CAUTION
Embracing is good, I like to hug, and I like to cuddle
But you should be very careful I would say
As there’s a very fine line between a cuddle
And holding them down so they can't get away
ELEMENTARY TAXI
I jumped into the cab
'Conan Doyle’s Close driver'
Don't worry; he said,
We’ll lose him at the lights Guvna
PARTY GUEST
I went to a party
And I really dressed to kill
The SAS combat fatigues
Seemed to fit the bill
IN CASE OF EMERGENCY
Whenever my wife fills in a form for me
And it asks who to notify in an emergency
She always writes down her name, what for?
I don’t want her called, she’s not a doctor
TGIF
I have just looked at the clock
And it’s left me feeling great
Its 4 o’clock on Friday afternoon
Or what I like to call the home straight
I’ve been dreading, turning forty,
But it occurred to me then
That I won’t really be 40
I’ll just be thirty 10
SENIOR RETIREMENT
At last I’m retired
It’s just what I desired
So goodbye to the tension
And hello to my pension
ABRASIVE BEHAVIOUR
I have been charged with murdering a man
With sandpaper, the really course grit
But I’m pleading it down to manslaughter
Because I only meant to rough him up a bit
EMBRACE WITH CAUTION
Embracing is good, I like to hug, and I like to cuddle
But you should be very careful I would say
As there’s a very fine line between a cuddle
And holding them down so they can't get away
ELEMENTARY TAXI
I jumped into the cab
'Conan Doyle’s Close driver'
Don't worry; he said,
We’ll lose him at the lights Guvna
PARTY GUEST
I went to a party
And I really dressed to kill
The SAS combat fatigues
Seemed to fit the bill
IN CASE OF EMERGENCY
Whenever my wife fills in a form for me
And it asks who to notify in an emergency
She always writes down her name, what for?
I don’t want her called, she’s not a doctor
TGIF
I have just looked at the clock
And it’s left me feeling great
Its 4 o’clock on Friday afternoon
Or what I like to call the home straight