MystyrMystyry
05-08-2011, 09:51 AM
He lifted his arsecheek, and Gosos, and Jour;
Byst farted, I farted - we farted all four;
"Great stink!" gagged the fireman, as his feet suddenly danced,
"Stink!" echoed his mate to our farting, askance;
Behind wilted the postman, as his eyes sank to rest,
As deep into the night we farted our best
Without a word to each other; we kept up the pace,
Stench by stench, stink by stink, never losing our place;
We gobbled more pizza and guzzled more beer,
Smoked more tobacco, perfect our pitch without peer;
Now refueled we are prepped for a long night ahead,
For tonight is Skunk Night - not for quids we'd be dead!
An early evening before we begin whilst the moment draws near
We are ready and set, with air relatively clear;
A boom - sonic I say! - loud as three roars of thunder
Heard in London next morning, and shook it asunder;
Which is as nothing to Paris where they thought war was starting,
But it was us, just us four, with our unison farting!
Our noise was so loud, resulting of a sudden the sun to
Appear in the sky briefly to see what was unto;
To say we were honoured would be a good guess,
We were flattered our flatulence had caused such unrest;
"All for one, one for all" had become our Skunk Motto,
As swiftly we waddle toward our Skunk Grotto
Here we will spend all night drinking, smoking and eating,
And by morning our production'd be something worth beating;
Gas generated from a great manner of produce,
The higher the roughage - but can you deduce?
The most voluminous output was attained by baked beans,
The shrillest note reached was got from spicy foreign cuisines!
Garlic saw rumbling with low and deep groans,
While onions created long whiny sinuous drones;
Spaghetti and peanuts got an identical wheeze,
Which without mercy brought poor Jour to his knees;
Mushroom pies let off a sort of nifty little flutter;
Sour cream custard Byst blustered - had to open the shutter
So, we're all dropping our guts, and Gosos and I,
Out window and door, parting clouds in the sky;
The full moon above scoffs a humourless snicker,
But it drops a few inches spying all the streetlamps aflicker
Beneath our feet crack and break the floorboards so brittle;
And sirens ring out through the night, squealing no little!
But had we gone too far with our collective last bellow,
As the hovel began to wobble like jello
“They'll be lurching with searchlights for what's causing the stir"
"But they'll never suspect us - not at this juncture"
"For we are the Skunks - the Foul Farting Four!"
"And we're beyond comparison - only us, and no more!"
Our nostrils filled with the rich pong of our noisome;
Begin crumbling the walls of our condiminium,
"Looks like our party has abruptly become over"
"Fret about it later - for now get to cover!"
We hustle and wrestle to get out of the door,
Nudging and tripping to be clear of the roar,
As down came the mortar, the bricks, and the beams;
Down came those rafters to drown out our screams
Beneath the dust and the muck sat a pile of rubble,
Perhaps the karmic sting we received for our trouble;
I recall waking in sunlight, though surrounded in shadow;
With aching noggin and bump, I rose to my elbow;
The zookeepers had snared me in a net (big, it is)
While the others had scattered (scarpered, that is)
Wasting away in an enclosure in the Metropolitan Zoo,
Bored to tears with meagre rations - damn prison food!
But as soon as I regain some more of my strength,
I'll be outta here, man, without serving the length;
It's to do with a plan which I have been hatching
Though the detail's still rough (and the guards are all watching)
But at night in the slammer I still put on a show,
You can be certain it's louder than the planes at Heathrow;
The odour will cause nervous paralysis - it's horrendous,
Akin to the zebra, moose, elephant, hippo and rhinoceros,
Though maybe threefold, perhaps ten, or to be sure,
At least a hundred- or possibly thousandfold - my stinks are that pure!
.
Byst farted, I farted - we farted all four;
"Great stink!" gagged the fireman, as his feet suddenly danced,
"Stink!" echoed his mate to our farting, askance;
Behind wilted the postman, as his eyes sank to rest,
As deep into the night we farted our best
Without a word to each other; we kept up the pace,
Stench by stench, stink by stink, never losing our place;
We gobbled more pizza and guzzled more beer,
Smoked more tobacco, perfect our pitch without peer;
Now refueled we are prepped for a long night ahead,
For tonight is Skunk Night - not for quids we'd be dead!
An early evening before we begin whilst the moment draws near
We are ready and set, with air relatively clear;
A boom - sonic I say! - loud as three roars of thunder
Heard in London next morning, and shook it asunder;
Which is as nothing to Paris where they thought war was starting,
But it was us, just us four, with our unison farting!
Our noise was so loud, resulting of a sudden the sun to
Appear in the sky briefly to see what was unto;
To say we were honoured would be a good guess,
We were flattered our flatulence had caused such unrest;
"All for one, one for all" had become our Skunk Motto,
As swiftly we waddle toward our Skunk Grotto
Here we will spend all night drinking, smoking and eating,
And by morning our production'd be something worth beating;
Gas generated from a great manner of produce,
The higher the roughage - but can you deduce?
The most voluminous output was attained by baked beans,
The shrillest note reached was got from spicy foreign cuisines!
Garlic saw rumbling with low and deep groans,
While onions created long whiny sinuous drones;
Spaghetti and peanuts got an identical wheeze,
Which without mercy brought poor Jour to his knees;
Mushroom pies let off a sort of nifty little flutter;
Sour cream custard Byst blustered - had to open the shutter
So, we're all dropping our guts, and Gosos and I,
Out window and door, parting clouds in the sky;
The full moon above scoffs a humourless snicker,
But it drops a few inches spying all the streetlamps aflicker
Beneath our feet crack and break the floorboards so brittle;
And sirens ring out through the night, squealing no little!
But had we gone too far with our collective last bellow,
As the hovel began to wobble like jello
“They'll be lurching with searchlights for what's causing the stir"
"But they'll never suspect us - not at this juncture"
"For we are the Skunks - the Foul Farting Four!"
"And we're beyond comparison - only us, and no more!"
Our nostrils filled with the rich pong of our noisome;
Begin crumbling the walls of our condiminium,
"Looks like our party has abruptly become over"
"Fret about it later - for now get to cover!"
We hustle and wrestle to get out of the door,
Nudging and tripping to be clear of the roar,
As down came the mortar, the bricks, and the beams;
Down came those rafters to drown out our screams
Beneath the dust and the muck sat a pile of rubble,
Perhaps the karmic sting we received for our trouble;
I recall waking in sunlight, though surrounded in shadow;
With aching noggin and bump, I rose to my elbow;
The zookeepers had snared me in a net (big, it is)
While the others had scattered (scarpered, that is)
Wasting away in an enclosure in the Metropolitan Zoo,
Bored to tears with meagre rations - damn prison food!
But as soon as I regain some more of my strength,
I'll be outta here, man, without serving the length;
It's to do with a plan which I have been hatching
Though the detail's still rough (and the guards are all watching)
But at night in the slammer I still put on a show,
You can be certain it's louder than the planes at Heathrow;
The odour will cause nervous paralysis - it's horrendous,
Akin to the zebra, moose, elephant, hippo and rhinoceros,
Though maybe threefold, perhaps ten, or to be sure,
At least a hundred- or possibly thousandfold - my stinks are that pure!
.