Bix

[Biggus]

Leon Bismark "Bix" Beiderbecke
(March 10, 1903 – August 6, 1931)

It was said of Bix
That his Cornet spat out notes
Like shooting bullets at a bell
And his solos sounded as sweet
As a girl saying yes.
Bix Beiderbecke was simply the best
He was at the birth of hot music
His light illuminated
The jazz age
His Cornet accompanied
The roaring twenties
He was a romantic legend,
The young man with a Horn
But in keeping with the character
Of the very best of youth
His flame burned very brightly
But equally it burned quickly
And like the most beautiful star
He burned himself out
All too soon
Bix lived for the jazz
But died for the booze

[MystyrMystyry]

I dig Bix!

This is great Biggus, hopefully more people will track him down (there are mp3's!) after reading this - I'm saving this to my special folder!

[MorpheusSandman]

A very interesting/original subject for an elegy. I'm marginally familiar with jazz, but I've never heard of Bix. I think the two similes that open the piece are the strongest part, especially "as a girl saying yes", which is such a lovely sentiment with so many implications. However, from there it gets a bit prose-like, as if you've simply taken factual statements and snapped them into free verse. Something like "he burnt himself out / all too soon" would be better if you build up to it, and removed the "all" part, so the disyllable spondee "too soon" line would echo the brevity of what you're saying and the meter would echo the force. The last two lines seem a bit arbitrary and cliche, especially since you'd never mentioned his drinking habit until then. Anyway, just some things to think about.

[Biggus]

Thanks Mystyry
He was a genius, and completely self taught.

[Biggus]

Thanks Morpheus I will definately revisit it with fresh eyes

Paul