I Woke Up

[lmc71775]

removed

[hillwalker]

You call this an excerpt from a memoir - but having read it there's not much happening in your life that seems worth sharing. Certainly not enough to warrant anyone reading it, hoping to discover some insight on the human condition. It might work as a diary entry or a blog - but it's rather flimsy fare otherwise.

Ok - I'm being unduly harsh. You write well, and I can sense your strong, resourceful personality through your 'voice'.

But telling us about your marital and financial troubles is a bit much unless there's a point to it all. It's such a feature of normal married life for a large portion of the population that your particular take on it has nothing original to offer. Unless..... you 'up your game' and find something new to say.

Good luck with it.

Oh. And, you might consider re-wording the transition from para. 2 to para. 3. As it stands, on first reading the guy with the satchel might be in bed with you! :-)

H

[lmc71775]

Sorry if it was boring to you. It was after all non-fiction. It's removed.