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Delta40
04-09-2011, 07:10 PM
I was curled up in the feeble position
lack toast and tolerant,
when you appeared butt naked.
I battered an eyelid, wild awake
thinking my chickens had come home to roast.
I thought you were a pigment of my imagination,
a night in shining amour who whispered 'cease the day'
Dough eyed, I let my deep seeded love cut to the cheese.

Alas in lame man’s terms, when all tolled,
in the spurt of the moment, I gave up the goat.
You soaked your wild oats then
left my never regions soaping wet.
Whoa is me! This was no curtsey call
more like a deformation of character!
You took me with a pinch assault.

From my vintage point,
you are the flaw in my ointment.
You rained supreme in the mist of my tears
and I am stark raven mad
like a bowl in a china shop
With much adieu over this fairy tail,
we must part waves.

Jerrybaldy
04-09-2011, 07:17 PM
Pun overload! Pun overload! You are a master (sorry mistress) of this style of writing Delta. This would have taken me a bloody age to put together, if ever. You are a night in shining amour. :D

Delta40
04-09-2011, 07:26 PM
I just used your line - sew me!

MorpheusSandman
04-10-2011, 04:12 AM
Pure win and awesome, Delta! I'm with you and Shakespeare in dearly loving puns, and I think you use it to nigh brilliance here. What's so great is that every change makes sense in the context, and it's hilarious and thoughtful at the same time. My favorite may be the first line, and I may have to steal "feeble position" someday. Damn near genius, man!

MystyrMystyry
04-10-2011, 04:57 AM
^ What they said - and I fell off the floor!

hillwalker
04-10-2011, 06:38 AM
Just brilliant.

H

PrinceMyshkin
04-10-2011, 10:30 AM
Wholely cowl!

Delta40
04-10-2011, 05:10 PM
wholey cow...lol

jajdude
04-10-2011, 08:16 PM
That was a treat to read.

qimissung
04-10-2011, 11:38 PM
I think you might be the new Ogden Nash, Delta!

Delta40
04-11-2011, 01:12 AM
It was good fun writing it!

everyadventure
04-11-2011, 10:10 AM
Wow, that must have been hard!

deryk
04-12-2011, 05:17 PM
This was the most fun poem I've read in quite some time. I feel like you've taken a machine-gun to cliches and forced grenades down the throats of boring colloquialisms. Crystal-veined trees sprout up from their smoking remains and throw us all a party. Fantastic.